'I just wanted to tel you that.' Austin shifted to face me.
A smart-ass, snotty reply rose to my lips, but didn't come
out. 'You don't have to apologize. We've been divorced
for years.'
When he reached for my hand, I shouldn't have been
surprised. It was the perfect moment, after al. Soft music,
expensive hot drinks, the scent of cheap body spray
wafting from the gaggle of out-too-late teens in the corner
and the rise and fal of their laughter al wove a John
Hughes–film mood. It was the perfect time to have my ex-
husband kiss my knuckles, look deep into my eyes and
say, with utmost seriousness,
'So, I didn't jerk off the other night. Just like you said.'
I yanked my hand from his. 'Austin!'
'What?' He looked genuinely confused. 'You said not to.'
'I know what I said.' My heart became a bird, my ribs the
cage it beat against.
He sat back, frowning, and crossed his arms over a chest I
couldn't help noticing was broad and muscled under his T-
shirt. 'And?'
I frowned, too. 'I thought you were trying to be nice.'
'I am being nice! I bought you coffee!'
'You asked me here to get me into bed!' I'd turned heads
with my raised voice. I stood and glared down at him.
'That was the only reason?'
Austin looked guilty. Then he shot me a cunt-seeking
missile of a grin. 'That's not the only reason.'
I jerked my chin at him and flipped my hair. Yeah, very
high school, but we had a history. 'Fuck you.'
'I'm hoping.'
I didn't want to smile or laugh, so I bit down on my
tongue. Hard. 'It's late. I have to work tomorrow. Good
night, Austin.'
night, Austin.'
I was gone before he could register the fact I meant it.
What Austin didn't know was that it wasn't that I didn't
want to take him to bed and screw the living daylights out
of him. I wanted that very much. But there was a part of
me, smal though it was, that knew this couldn't be good
for either one of us.
We had history, and a past, and al of that meant he knew
how to push my buttons just right. It didn't mean we
should keep pushing those buttons. Like Def Leppard
said, it was time to stop treating each other like an act of
war.
I made it al the way to the sidewalk before he was out
after me. Austin grabbed my elbow and I turned to face
him, my mouth already open to say something cutting. He
stopped it with his tongue. He walked me up against the
bricks, hard on my back. Him hard on my front.
