Need more examples of differences between sports.sh and keepers? Read on:
A woman who commands respect is a keeper; a woman who lets men get away with disrespecting her is a throwback.
A woman who is dressed appropriately has her goodies reasonably covered, but is still sexy, is a keeper; a woman who is scantily clad and dripping sex is a throwback.
A woman who won't let you feel all over her body while you're dancing is a keeper; a woman who drops it like it's hot and puts on a dance.oor performance that would make video vixen Karrine Steffans blush is a throwback.
A woman who takes a man's number but doesn't give him her own is a keeper; a woman who hands out her home, work, and cell phone numbers and e-mail and home addresses to a man who's done nothing more than buy her a drink and ask how he can reach her is a throwback.
A woman who can hold a respectful, respectable conversation with a man and his mother is a keeper; a woman who shudders at the prospect of having to talk to the matriarch of a man's family is a throwback.
A woman who can adapt to any situation thrown at her she can hold her own at the PTA meeting, in the boardroom, in a restaurant, at a sporting event is a keeper; a woman who can't put together a coherent sentence or makes it clear she has no interest in doing so is a throwback.
A woman who knows she wants to be married and raise a family and lets a man know this up front is a keeper; a woman who doesn't have a plan for her relationship life beyond next weekend is a throwback.
A woman whom we can introduce to our friends and family is a keeper; a woman we don't even bother introducing to our friends or family is a throwback.
A woman who smiles and takes care of herself and is generally happy with her life is a keeper; a woman who doesn't take care of herself and is sour all the time, has an attitude wider than all the ocean, and doesn't hesitate to lay somebody out for the slightest transgression is a throwback.
A woman who shows her appreciation for all that you do for her is a keeper; a woman who acts like nothing you do can make her happy is a throwback.
A woman who is loyal is a keeper; a woman who always has her eye out for the next best thing is a throwback.
A woman who understands that a man validates his manhood by who he is, what he does, and how much he makes, and who knows how to.nesse her relationship so that her man feels like he's handling his business is a keeper; a woman who wields her paycheck and in.uence like a sword and belittles his career and.nancial contributions is a throwback.
If his conversation with you is extremely super.cial, and never seems to graduate beyond the surface, he's sport.shing; if he genuinely seems interested in your needs, life, desires, and future, then he's looking for a keeper.
If he laughs off your requirements and standards, then he's sport.shing; if he seems willing to abide by your rules, and actually follows through on them, then he's looking for a keeper.
If he takes your phone number but waits longer than twenty-four hours to call, he's sport.shing; if he calls you right away, he's showing that he's genuinely interested in you, and is most likely looking for a keeper.
If he takes you out on a date and lets you pay, or only kicks in his portion of the bill, he's sport.shing; if he pays the bill, he's showing that he's willing to provide for you, which means he's likely looking for a keeper.
If he tells you he's going to be somewhere at a certain time, and he consistently shows up late without so much as the courtesy of a phone call, he's probably sport.shing; if he shows up when he's supposed to, he's looking for a keeper.
If you never meet his friends, family, co-workers, or other people who are important to him, he's sport.shing; if he introduces you to his people, he might be looking for a keeper.
If he keeps offering up excuses for why he can't meet your friends and family, he's sport.shing; if he agrees to go to the family barbecue or a social event where he will be introduced to family, friends, and co-workers, he might consider you a keeper.
If he cringes at the mere mention of children, he's sport.shing; if he's willing to meet your kids and shows up with gifts and can relate to them in a way that makes them comfortable with him, then he might consider you and your kids keepers.
If he does not have himself together.nancially, emotionally, and spiritually, he may be sport.shing; if he is capable of providing and protecting his potential family the way a real man should, then he might be searching for a keeper.
If he lobbies for an open relationship and says he's cool with you seeing other people, then he's sport.shing; if he wants your relationship to be exclusive and he agrees to date only you, he considers you a keeper.
7
Every day on the Steve Harvey Morning Show, my cohost Shirley and I have a really popular segment called Strawberry Letter 23, during which we invite our listeners to let us help them solve their problems. We get all kinds of e-mails and letters from people desperate for advice on how to handle wild kids, overly demanding bosses, cheating boyfriends, out-of-control baby's mommas, money-grubbing family members, horrible friendships you name it, we hear about it. Some of the questions are extremely sad, some of them are so surprising they make you want to clutch your chest, and some of them just make you shake your head and wonder how the person asking for advice made it through. The people who write those letters aren't doing it in a vacuum; for every problem addressed in Strawberry Letter 23, there are thousands of listeners out there dealing with the same drama in their own lives. We give our opinions on the situation, and some sound suggestions for how they can get out of the mess they're in with the hope that the advice we're passing on helps not only the person who wrote us, but the legions of fans also looking for answers.
A lot of the Strawberry Letters touch me, but one that stood out to me recently was from a woman who wrote an attention getter in the subject line: Did I Marry a Man or a Boy? She went on to say that she's a thirty-.ve-year- old woman who is married to a thirty-year-old man she'd dated for ten years before they got married about six months ago. She claimed that although their relationship is great, his controlling mother is driving her crazy. Here's some of what she wrote:
She controls my husband like he is a little child. She calls on him to do everything. She calls my house late at night and I can hear her through the phone, screaming at him about something that she may not have agreed on. She calls on him for money, to paint her house, to pick her up from the movies, to cook for special occasions, and even wash her clothes. What prompted me to write this letter is the fact that it is now 10:42 P. M., and I am home alone because my husband was just called by his mother to come to her house to help bake cakes for a fund-raiser tomorrow. I had plans to spend time with my husband tonight, but once again, his mother got in the way. Don't get me wrong: I love the fact that he respects and helps his mother, but sometimes I feel left out. My kids and I are often put on the back burner because he is always doing something for his mother. All these years I have kept my thoughts about this to myself, but I don't know how much more I can take… his mother is always taking away from our family. I sometimes feel like I didn't marry a man… I need him to be a man and take control.
Now I sympathize for Did I Marry a Man or a Boy? I hear from all too many women who face the same problem: their men are excessively attached to their mothers at an age where you expect the sons to be totally independent it's a bond that allows the mothers of these men to exert all kinds of control over their lives, usually to the detriment of romantic relationships. The mother says, Jump, the son asks, How high and when do you need me to be back? and the girlfriend/wife rolls her eyes and sits in the corner with her mouth poked out, wondering (a) why this grown man just can't.x his mouth to say no every once in a while, (b) why this woman holds so much power over her man, and (c) what kind of tool can she buy/ rent/borrow/invent to detach the two of them so that she and her man can get back to the business of building a life together. No matter what they say, no matter what they do, no matter how many different ways they slice it, women like Did I Marry a Man or a Boy? feel like they just can't compete with The Other Woman the mother. Those same women will toss up more motives than a DA to
