jogging.”
“Turn around!” Arbuthnot snapped.
“Aren’t you worried about our germs?”
“That’s why I want you to turn around. I just tested, and the breeze is blowing from that direction. I want you to turn around and change places with me. That will put you downwind. Come on-snap it up!”
Max and 99 and Arbuthnot changed places. Arbuthnot moved to the street, and Max and 99 took his place on the porch of the hotel.
“Now, we’ll jog,” Arbuthnot informed them. He pointed. “We’ll go that way with the wind. You lead and I’ll follow. Not too fast, though. Too fast is running, not jogging. Ready?”
“Just a minute,” Max objected. “I think, according to the rules, you’re allowed to lock us up again or assassinate us. But jogging is out. That’s an indignity that I insist on being spared. Suppose somebody I know saw me jogging around town at the crack of dawn? It’s all right with me if
Arbuthnot shrugged. “Well, I always jog at this time in the morning,” he said, “and I have no intention of disrupting my routine. So,” he said, raising his pistol, “I guess I’ll just have to assassinate you.”
“I’ll jog,” Max decided.
“That-a-way!” Arbuthnot said, pointing downwind.
Max and 99 jogged down the steps from the porch, then jogged up the street, with Arbuthnot a few steps behind them.
“Right at the bank,” Arbuthnot ordered. “Then left at the jail, right again at the bakery, another right at the blacksmith’s shop, left at the cafe, left, right, left at the watering trough, general store and saloon, then right again at the stable. Got that?”
“I don’t think so,” Max replied, continuing to jog. “Maybe you better come up here and lead and we’ll go back there and hold the gun.”
“Don’t get smart, Smart!”
Max and 99 turned right at the bank, then a few minutes later, took a left at the jail.
Keeping his voice low, Max said, “I think I know how to get out of this, 99. If we play it right, we can lose Arbuthnot. Remember the instructions he gave us? Well, where he told us to jog, instead, we’ll jag.”
“I don’t think I quite understand that, Max.”
“When we get to the bakery, where he told us to turn right, we’ll turn left, instead,” Max explained. “Then left at the blacksmith’s shop, and right at the cafe, right, left, right at the watering trough, general store and saloon, then-”
“Max,” 99 broke in, “when we get to the saloon, rather than turning right, why don’t we go in?”
“That would disrupt the routine, 99. If jogging is going to do you any good at all, you have to establish a regimen for yourself and stick to it. Consistency is the secret to-”
“Max! It’s Arbuthnot who’s interested in jogging, not us. We’re interested in the Coolidge-head penny. And the penny is in the saloon.”
“All right, then,” Max said, “instead of a left at the blacksmith’s shop, we’ll take- Better yet, 99, just follow me. When we reach the bakery, I’m going to take a left. After that, I’ll play it by ear, always keeping firmly in mind, of course, that our ultimate destination should be the saloon.”
“I’ll be right behind you, Max.”
A few seconds later, they reached the bakery. Max cut sharply to the left, and 99 stayed right behind him.
“Stop!” they heard Arbuthnot shout angrily. “You’re disrupting the routine!”
“This way!” Max called, racing around a corner. “Are you still with me, 99?”
“I’m here, Max!”
“Now, through the blacksmith shop!” Max said. “Then around the watering trough, past the general store, through the jail, and into the saloon!”
“I’m right with you, Max!”
Running as fast as he could move, Max led the way around the blacksmith shop, then through the watering trough-which, fortunately, was dry-then around the general store, then into the jail and into a cell.
“Max, that window has bars on it,” 99 pointed out.
“You’re right, 99. Back the other way.”
They whipped around and ran in the other direction. But not far. Two feet later they crashed into the closed and locked cell door. On the other side, facing them, was Arbuthnot.
“Max! What happened!” 99 wailed.
“Evidently we took a left when we should have taken a right,” Max replied. “It could happen to anybody, 99. I’ve never jogged in this town before.” He looked puzzledly at Arbuthnot. “But how did you know you’d find us here?” he asked.
“It had to happen,” Arbuthnot replied. “When I saw you jogging through the watering trough, I said to myself, ‘Anybody with a brain like that, he’s going to trap himself in a cell over in the jail house.’ So, I just trotted over here, and here you were.”
“You have a very frank way of putting things,” Max told him. “You’d make somebody a terrible wife.”
“I’m sorry I can’t stay,” Arbuthnot said, leaving. “But old jails are usually crawling with germs.” He went out the doorway, then closed the door behind him.
“Locked in with all these germs,” Max muttered.
99 went back to the window. “I can see the hotel from here, Max,” she reported. “There’s Arbuthnot. He’s going inside.”
“99. .”
She turned toward him. “Yes, Max?”
Max pointed to the cot, the only item of furniture in the cell. “It just moved,” he said.
“Max. . you’re imagining. .”
“I tell you, it just- See that! It did it again!”
“Yes! I saw it, too!” 99 said, staring wide-eyed at the cot. “Max, do you think the cell is haunt-” She suddenly brightened. “Max, of course! It’s probably the old prospector! We can’t see him because he’s disappeared! But he’s here! He’s here with us!”
“A lot of good that does,” Max said.
“I guess you’re right,” 99 agreed gloomily. She went back to the window. “Look, Max,” she said. “One of the KAOS assassins just came out of the hotel and he’s carrying a tray of food and heading this way.”
Max joined her at the window. “Arbuthnot probably sent him to feed us,” he said. “We wouldn’t be very valuable as hostages if we starved to death. Listen, 99, when that assassin gets here, let’s try to lure him into the cell. Then we can overpower him and escape.”
“We can try,” 99 said. “He probably won’t even speak to us, though.”
“99, don’t judge all KAOS assassins by Arbuthnot,” Max said reprovingly. “That’s not fair. Frankly, in general, I’ve found most KAOS assassins to be genial, friendly, polite and genuinely interested in other people’s welfare- assuming, of course, that those other people aren’t marked for assassination.”
“Maybe so, Max, but-”
At that moment, the jail door opened, and the KAOS assassin, a young, blond, smiling young man, entered, carrying a tray of food. “Hi y’all,” he grinned, moving to the cell door. “The boss man told me to tote you over some victuals. He figures you must have a powerful hunger by now.” He frowned, looking into the cell. “Why, that’s a terrible place in there,” he said. “You got no carpet on the floor, the whole shebang needs a new coat of paint, that window hasn’t got nary a curtain on it, and that-” He shook his head in sorrow. “It’s too terrible even to talk about. Say, how’d you like to have some new furnishings? Maybe a couple nice comfy overstuffed chairs and some nice reading lamps and-” He got a key from his pocket. “Hold it a minute-I’ll come in there, and we’ll plan on what we can do to redecorate the place.”
“See how nice they can be,” Max said to 99, as the KAOS assassin opened the door and then entered the cell. “Now, aren’t you ashamed of yourself for thinking what you were thinking?”
“I suppose so, Max,” 99 nodded. Then she whispered, “Don’t forget. . we’re going to over-”
