years. We have to put all of it behind us if we're ever going to make it something better. And that includes the Nina Milyukins of this world.'
The more I thought about it the angrier I became.
You know what you did? You said what Mikhail Milyukin had purposely left unsaid. He knew she was spying on him, but he chose to stay silent. He felt it was better to have her reporting what he did to the KGB than not to have her at all.'
I shook my head sadly. You've thrown away a valuable life,' I told him. I hope you can live with that.'
After that I stayed out of his way for a while, liaising with Vladimir Voznosensky at the State Prosecutor's Office and busying myself with the preparation of the numerous cases we had against the Georgians and the Ukrainians. But at Sasha's funeral he came up and took me aside for a minute.
You were right,' he said. There was no need to say what I said. It was unforgivable.'
I wasn't right,' I said, and told him how I had been planning to see more of Nina Milyukin. But maybe we were both wrong.'
They gave Sasha a burial with full honours. A militia detachment fired a salute over his grave. And the city council gave his widow a cheque for two thousand roubles. It was just four months' pay.
After the funeral several of us went back to Nikolai's house for a drink. It wasn't much of an evening. At an early stage Nikolai lifted a glass and said Good health', and Grushko glowered at him and replied, Are we drinking, or talking?' But gradually, as more vodka was consumed, things eased up just a bit and Grushko described how his daughter seemed determined to go and live in America.
Why should anyone want to go and live in America?' he said. That's what I'd like to know. Then he looked at me meaningfully and added: 'At least here you can always blame someone else when something goes wrong.
25
As my reverie ended, the compartment door opened with a rush of air and noise and the carriage attendant came to offer us tea from her samovar. As if to atone for my poor company I paid for two glasses and handed one carefully to my attractive travelling companion. Then the door closed, leaving us alone once again.
She smiled. Thank you.'
Where are you from?' I asked her. For a moment she was silent, her hands cupped around her glass as she sipped the steaming hot tea.
From Moscow. I'm a ballerina. I was with the Kirov, but now I'm going back to the Bolshoy. What about you?'
I'm a policeman.' Briefly I described my trip to St Petersburg.
I wondered whether or not to add that I had really been sent to St Petersburg as part of an undercover investigation, to look for any evidence of corruption in Grushko's department. Perhaps these things are best left unsaid, even today when there is so much honesty and openness in government. Some people find it hard to understand this kind of work. But with all investigations into police corruption you have to put duty ahead of personal relationships. Like the time I had to pretend to be corrupt myself in order to trap another policeman. That wasn't pleasant. The man, who lost his job and went to prison, had a wife and family. Besides, it was not as if I had found any evidence that Grushko and his men were on the take. Far from it. To me, it seemed that Kornilov had merely wished to be quite certain that his men were thoroughly honest. That was understandable. The nature of Grushko's work made him and his men vulnerable to corruption. So I had little to feel too guilty about. After all, as Grushko himself would have agreed, an honest police force was the only way that the Mafia would ever be broken. Even so, I could have wished that there had been an opportunity for more honesty between us, although right to the last I think Grushko had always suspected who I was and what I was really up to.
I shrugged. Now it was me trying to make conversation. I would have been driving back to Moscow now, except that the head gasket went on my car again.'
Again?'
Yes, I'd just got it back on the road after the last one went.'
She laughed, shook her head and the air was filled with the smell of her perfume which was like nothing I'd ever encountered before. That's too bad.
Well, at least I've had the chance of meeting you.'
Oh, there's nothing much interesting about me.'
No? I should have thought being a dancer was interesting.'
She grimaced. Hard work.'
I love the ballet. Someone in Central Board offered to get me tickets for the Kirov, only I never found the time to go.'
I'll arrange some tickets for you to come and see me at the Bolshoy, if you like.'
Just the one would be fine.'
She took out a notebook and a pencil. Tell me your address and I'll send you one.'
I thought for a minute. I could always stay with my mother and my sister for a few days, but I couldn't see how I could go and live there permanently any more than I could have gone back to my wife. I explained about how my wife and I were seeking a divorce and that she had better send the tickets to the police headquarters on Petrovka.
She made a note of the address and then looked concerned.
But where will you live?' she asked.
I'll find somewhere I expect,' I said and changed the subject. Are you married?'
Divorced.'
You know,' she added tentatively, if you're looking for somewhere, there's a spare room you could have.'
Really? No, I couldn't.' But my thoughts were already racing ahead to something altogether more connubial. Did beautiful ballerinas ever fall for policemen outside of the movies? I thought it more likely that my tone-deaf daughter would become a concert pianist. Could I?'
It's not much of a place,' she said. Besides, it might be handy to have a policeman around. After all, it's not very safe these days.' She showed me the air-pistol she carried in her handbag. You know, I often come back quite late at night.'
Look, are you sure? I mean, you don't really know me. I mean, I could be absolutely anyone.'
But she had convinced herself of the merit of her idea.
Yes,' she said thoughtfully. It might be quite nice to come home and know that there was a policeman in the place.'
Well, you know what they say,' I said. It's a lot cheaper than owning a dog.'
THE END
