Magic's Promise

'But you won't look for new friends either. Or love. Van, you're making a serious mistake.'

'It's mine to make.'

'I can't stay,' Tantras said, after a long silence. 'I have to courier messages back. I only waited to tell you.'

Vanyel nodded, grief too profound to be purged with one spate of weeping rising to block his words. 'Duty; we all have it. That's what kept me, Tran, that, and finally figuring out what I'm doing here. And that's what Jays died for - duty, and protecting the ones we all love.' He stared at a spot on the opposite wall while his eyes burned and blurred. 'Thanks for waiting to tell me.'

Tantras eased off the bed, and squeezed his hand. 'Rest. When there's more to tell, we'll get the word to you.'

'Thank you,' he murmured, closing his eyes. He heard soft footsteps crossing the floor; heard the door open and close. Then knew nothing more for a very long time.

The Healer had done his best, but the wound Father Leren's knife had left was only half healed, and still very sore. Vanyel had just discovered that getting from his bed to the chair beside his table was a sweating and pain- filled ordeal. The Healer had sternly warned him about the consequences of tearing open half-healed tissues, and Vanyel was inclined to take him very seriously, given the way he was hurting. He didn't want to make a bigger mess of his midsection than it already was. As it was, he'd have an L-shaped scar for the rest of his life. Gut wounds were definitely not on his list of favored ways to earn a little rest.

Getting dressed had been an ordeal, too, but the Healer had said he could have visitors, and he wasn't going to see them bundled in bed like an invalid.

He eased himself down into the chair with a hiss as someone knocked on the door to his room. 'Come,' he called, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand.

It was not anyone he had expected. It was Melenna.

A much subdued, sobered Melenna.

'I came to see if you were really all right,' she said, shyly, “and to ask Herald Vanyel for a favor, and some advice.'

Herald Vanyel. Not Van. And the fear is in her, too.

'Please, Melenna, sit down. I can't imagine why you'd want my advice, but -'

She remained standing. 'Vanyel,' she said softly. 'You - and me. There's no hope, is there?'

He looked up, and the honest longing in her eyes made his heart go out to her, the anger and frustration of the past few weeks evaporating. The gods knew, he knew exactly how it felt to long for something you'd never have - or never have again. 'I'm sorry, Melenna, but I won't lie to you. It was hopeless from the start. A woman can never be anything more than my friend. I do value you as a friend, and the mother of my very young friend Medren, but I can't offer you any more than that.'

She bent her head, and quickly wiped her eyes, all coquettishness gone. 'I - you know how I feel. Couldn't you - pretend? It would make Lady Treesa and Lord Withen awfully happy. And I wouldn't mind, really I wouldn't.'

He looked away from those sad, sad eyes. The offer was terribly tempting. But ultimately, a lie. 'I know it would make them happy, but I'm a Herald, Melenna. I can't tell lies - how could I live one? And you would care, eventually. It would make you very unhappy. There are other men - shay'a'chern - who've talked with me, who tried just what you're suggesting. In the end, instead of two people who were only moderately happy most of the time, there were two people who were desperately unhappy all the time. The wife was jealous of his lovers, and his lovers were jealous of her, and it went downhill from there.' He shook his head. 'No, my friend, it won't work. I'm sorry.'

She wiped another tear away. 'I'm sorry, too,' she said. 'But to tell you the truth, I'm mostly sorry for myself, and a little bit for Treesa.' She sighed. 'Can I - ask you a favor? And you can say no. It's about Medren.'

'If it's about Medren, the answer is probably 'yes,' ' he said. 'Your son is a delight to any musician, and a charmer all by himself.'

'Would you - sort of be his guardian until he's settled? He's never been away from home at all. I know he isn't shy, but that's the problem. He seems a lot older than he really is, and that's my fault, I guess. He could get in with a faster crowd than he can handle.'

He stared at her, astounded. 'You'd trust me - ?”

She returned his astonished stare levelly. 'I'm not very clever, sometimes,' she replied, 'but I listen, I listen a lot. You're very honorable, and in all the stories about you and - others, there's only been men. Not boys. Besides, Medren told me how he offered to pay for lessons, and how you