One Coffee With

Before Jordan could find a reply. Professor Quinn noticed that the workman on the guy rope had slackened his hold, and that the sculptured word hovered dangerously close to the wall.

'You there! Watch what you're doing!' he ordered sharply.

The workman turned and glared at him. 'Who you think you bossing what to do?' he cried in heavily accented anger.

'Oh, God!' groaned Quinn, recognizing nemesis in brown coveralls.

'Yah! You should call on God to forgive you!' agreed the workman.

'Listen, you dumb hunky! Watch what you're doing!' cried the suddenly enraged Quinn.

'You call me hunky! You dare, you-you thieving fattyu!'

Sam Jordan was startled by the usually urbane Riley Quinn's loss of composure. This supposedly lofty academic had spoken like a common guttersnipe. But the situation was too perilous to worry about minor cracks in the deputy chairman's facade.

'What the hell's going on!' he yelled at the workman. 'Will you watch what you're doing?'

He was too late.

The dot of the sculpture's lowercase i was a fifteen pound hollow metal ball that hung from the left cross-bar of the capital T by a slender three-foot chain. As the enraged workman shook his fist at Professor Quinn, the chain began to swing like a pendulum. The dot, now converted into a miniature wrecking ball, crashed through a third-floor window, putting a halt to Professor Lowenheim's remarks on unity and coherence.

'See what you make me do?' screamed the workman. 'I kill you for this! I punch your nose in, you rohadt alak!'

A fellow worker from Buildings and Grounds blocked the workman's furious lunge toward Riley Quinn, and the red-haired girl rushed for the guy rope before the steel dot could do further damage.

'I'll have you fired!' Professor Quinn promised, almost purple now with answering rage. 'I've endured all the threats and insults from you that I intend to take!'

Laughter, catcalls and applause from the surrounding windows followed the deputy chairman's stormy withdrawal from the field of battle.

Thus the arrival of the first piece of artwork for the Art Department 's spring faculty exhibition.

At that point, Wednesday morning stopped being normal at Vanderlyn College. Especially for the Art Department.

3

IN a department rampant with egoists, eccentrics and aesthetes, the chairman's secretary, Sandy Keppler, was sensible, efficient and decorative, with long blond hair, fair skin and a smile that began in blue eyes and ended in devastating dimples. But even her considerable tact and charm were taxed by the effort of soothing Professor Quinn's ruffled feathers when he came storming into the Art Department offices on the seventh floor of Van Hoeen Hall shortly after eight-thirty.

Sandy listened to him rage and then put through his telephone call to the office of Buildings and Grounds. Before long Quinn's voice could be heard repeating stridently, 'S-z-a-b-o. Szabo! Mike Szabo. The man's a lunatic! Every time I turn around, there he is, accusing me of the most incredible actions. I want him fired. Yes, I'm aware that unions-yes, I know about due process-damn it, I do have sufficient grounds! Haven't you been listening?'

The official in Buildings and Grounds might have been inattentive, but those members of the department who had come to work early were all ears, drifting in and out of Sandy 's office on flimsy pretexts. Quinn was usually such an imperturbable bastard. A born critic and as such, little loved, he was sharp-tongued and thick-skinned; very seldom could anyone slip a needle under that armor. How a clumsy workman with broken English could make him fall apart was a question that puzzled almost everyone, especially the junior members who didn't know Mike Szabo's history.

It did not puzzle Piers Leyden, however. Not only did Leyden (Assistant Professor, Life Painting) know why Quinn was irritated by the very sight of Mike Szabo, it was Leyden who had spoken to a crony over at Buildings and Grounds and caused Szabo to be hired. He had done it deliberately and with malice aforethought, and now he stood in Sandy 's office enjoying the fruits of his labors.

Quinn caught sight of Leyden 's grinning face through the open office door and with a visible effort drew himself together.

'An interesting phenomenon, laughter,' he observed coldly. 'I shall certainly have to incorporate more of it myself in my new book.'

Quinn's comment was a pointed reminder of the power he, as a critic, had to make or break artistic careers.

It was Leyden 's turn to glower.

Sandy managed to prevent open warfare by reminding Quinn of his nine-o'clock class, but when he popped back in at nine-fifty for the slides he needed for his ten o'clock lecture, he was still in such waspish temper that he insulted two more of his colleagues and sent a graduate assistant home in tears.

By ten-twenty-five, though, the floor was quiet, things seemed almost normal, and Sandy felt she could safely start on her usual trip to the cafeteria for coffee. Although she was really secretary only to the chairman, Oscar Nauman, Sandy considered the whole department her responsibility. She sheltered its people from Administration's hectoring; she typed their essays for scholarly art journals and their subsequent angry rebuttals to the editors of those same journals; she listened with amusement to their jokes and with sympathy to their diatribes; and-as with her intercession between Leyden and Quinn earlier-she trod a fine impartial line between the studio artists and the art historians.

In that uneasy coexistence Sandy Keppler's artful curves were one subject both factions could usually agree on, although Piers Leyden, a neo-realist, thought she could have modeled for Fragonard, while Dumont, a baroque specialist, argued for Tiepolo. It was a spirited battle, but since Sandy 's heart belonged to David Wade, one of the young untenured lecturers, discussion of her body remained purely academic.

To add to her charms, she did as favors tasks that others might have considered demeaning. She wanted a midmorning cup of coffee, and she wanted to drink it in her big, shabby office amid rowdy, disputatious staff and students, so why should she be selfish about it? As long as it was her choice and not something demanded, Sandy was quite willing to fetch refreshments for anyone else.

As she skimmed down the hall to the elevator, she was intercepted by Associate Professor Albert Simpson (Classical Art History) and Lemuel Vance (Associate Professor, Printmaking), who both fumbled in their pockets for change. Vance wanted hot chocolate.

'Tea for you, Professor?' asked Sandy.

'No, I think I'll have coffee today,' said Professor Simpson. 'Black with one sugar, please.'

Lemuel Vance couldn't resist the gleam of Sandy 's long bare legs beneath a spring green cotton skirt.

'Summer must be 'icumen in,'' he grinned. 'Those are the first female legs I've seen since last fall.'

Vance knew all about the practical aspects of pants-their comfort, their convenience, their warmth in cold weather-and one always ran the risk of being called a chauvinist if one expressed a simple admiration of female anatomy, but how lovely were young girls in spring dresses! The pale green and gold of her reminded him of Botticelli's Venus, and he was unwisely tempted into a classical allusion. 'You look as fresh as Aphrodite when she was first fashioned from sea spray!'

Professor Simpson could never let a classical misapprehension go uncorrected. 'Actually she wasn't formed from sea spray, you know,' he told Vance kindly. 'If you'll recall, Cronus mutilated his father, Uranus, and flung the-'

Belatedly the elderly historian remembered that Sandy was a living, breathing girl, not a mythological abstraction. Unwilling to elaborate further on Cronus's unfilial behavior, he broke off in old-fashioned reticence.