never like this before either. I lifted Al, which made my whole body feel like it was ripping and plopped him over the side of the fence. I avoided the gate because it was too close to my meditating friend to chance it.
Al wasted no time and headed right over to his own cute brunette. He sniffed for a while and in turn let himself be sniffed. Then, without even a Barry White soundtrack to set the mood, Al let loose with the Allah-King love-tron.
I’m not sure if you’ve ever seen a basset hound make love to a Corgi, but if you haven’t, don’t rush to. Al was using muscles I’ve never seen him use before, and I swear his brown eyes rolled back just before he closed them for his final drives. Apparently, Al had it going on because Ms. Corgi started to bark in what I could only imagine was some sort of canine bliss. Good for Ms. Corgi, not good for her yogasizing mother and unfortunate for me.
“Oh my God, Matisse!” she screamed. “What has he done to you?”
Al, meanwhile, kind of slumped down in the middle of the park and looked at me like he wanted a Kool Menthol. Matisse ran toward her traumatized mother with what I thought was an extra little spring in her short step.
“You pig, you, you, you… keep that thing away from my Matisse!” she continued to yell, her face flushed and her hair coming out of place. I wondered what happened to her meditative state.
“C’mere, Al,” I said, and Al slowly rose and stretched and then waddled to the fence where I lifted him over and put him back on his leash. I swear he looked up and winked at me. I decided not to try to say anything.
We walked back to the Eldorado, and I noticed the sun was starting to set and thought that it might be a good time to head to AJ’s. Who was I kidding? It was almost always a good time to go to AJ’s.
I wasn’t sure if the Foursome had gotten wind of the news. Coverage was all over the place, but you never could tell what was hitting the brain trust’s radar. My questions were answered the second I walked through the door.
“There he is, our favorite Mick/Polack superhero!” Jerry Number One said before I got a foot in the joint. The four of them gave me a standing ovation.
“Don’t forget his kemosabe, Al, the frog dog,” Rocco said.
“Actually, that would be his Tonto,” Jerry Number Two said.
“Tonto? I know Al’s short, but I don’t think he looks like one of those toy trucks,” TC said.
“No, no, no. Tonto was Dorothy’s little dog in The Wizard of Oz,” Rocco said.
“He wasn’t a basket hound,” TC said.
“That’s bastard hound. Remember, because of the drool? They swim underwater to find explosives,” Jerry Number One said.
“No, they don’t. They’re French, not underwater swimmers,” Jerry Number Two said.
“What do you got against the French and what makes you think the French can’t swim?” TC asked.
“I got plenty against the French,” Rocco said.
“Like what?” Jerry Number Two said.
“First of all, making their bastard hounds swim underwater,” Rocco said.
“Tonto wasn’t French, he was Indian,” Jerry Number One said.
“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you,” Rocco said.
I decided to break in.
“Thanks fellas. AJ, set everybody up with a Jameson and get a cheeseburger going for Al. It’s good to be here-shit, it’s good to be anywhere,” I said.
Kelley had his Coors Light in front of him and he took a sip after we all threw back the Jameson.
“How you feeling?” Kelley asked.
“Like I’m on Mars,” I said.
“Yeah, I think I know what you mean.”
“What happened to Mullings-what was that shit all about?”
“Turns out he was just overanxious to get Howard and was trying to break the case on his own. He was hiding evidence and investigating on his own free time.”
“Is he in big trouble?”
“Probably not a good career move-there will be hearings and whatnot.” We both paused to sip beer.
“Hey, here’s some news. Al got laid this afternoon.”
“That makes one of us.”
“Yeah, the guy interrupts me every time I get close and yet I turn him loose on some hot Corgi in the park.”
“Uh, Duff? Hot Corgi? I’m starting to worry about you,” Kelley said, shaking his head and taking a long chug of beer.
“Starting?” I said.
“Yeah, who am I kidding?”
“Hey Duff, what was the story on the karate kid?”
“He was the kid whose mother’s boyfriend was smacking them around. He’s a goofy kid who I think took on all the karate shit as a persona to make up for the lack of a dad and a real sense of who he is,” I said.
Kelley shook his head.
“Now you’re getting deep on me,” he said.
“Maybe, but you know what I mean. He’s sixteen and a goofy, pizza-faced kid who gets picked on all the time. So he goes into this kind of fantasyland of karate and works hard at it. In his own way, he’s a courageous and tough son of a bitch,” I said.
“I think I got you. The kid becomes a karate guy as a protection and to find some structure in his life. It’s kind of good but kind of sad at the same time-why should a kid like that have to try so hard?” Kelley said.
“Hey, maybe there’s a future in social work for you after all.”
“Yeah, not in this lifetime. That kid saved your ass, though.”
“No doubt. I wish I could pay him back.” I sat and looked at my Schlitz, as the Yanks’ game went on in the background. If it wasn’t for Billy, I’d be dead. Without a doubt, the kid was a hero’s hero and it was important that he feel that somehow.
Then it came to me.
“Kell, I need a favor,” I said.
“What else is new?” he said.
“Go get Billy and bring him here in about an hour.”
“What? Why?”
“Trust me on this, will you?”
“Geez, you’re nuts,” Kelley said and then finished his beer before getting up to go get Billy.
44
I called Dr. Pacquoa and told him what I was thinking. He said he would round up Javier Sanchez for help. Their participation was a must because with the way Billy perceived the world, appearance was going to be important. I filled Rocco in and he was psyched to be part of it-after all he did some hand-to-hand shit in Okinawa when he was in the service and he could bullshit with the rest of them. Most importantly, I went back to the Moody Blue because I had something to find.
The Moody Blue doesn’t come complete with walk-in closets, so when you go to look in your storage, there’s really only a couple of places that you have to look. In the living room that was built as an addition, there’s a small closet and there’s a few boxes where I kept various things in absolutely no order at all. Some things like my first set of gloves really meant something, but I also had an eighth-grade report card that I held on to for no other reason than the fact that I held on to it for years.
It took a while but I found what I was looking for. It was next to an empty Schlitz Tall Boy that I kept from the night in high school I went bush drinking with Delores Boyajin and, well, special things happened that night. I threw Al back in the car and raced back to AJ’s.
Billy and Kelley weren’t back but Dr. Pacquoa and Sanchez were already there and they were standing
