Katherine, to your parents, to your friends, your old addresses, anyone who knows you. They will build up a profile of your habits, your likes and dislikes, your loves and hates, your strengths and weaknesses. They will seize your bank accounts, trace your credit cards, interview your friends, grill your enemies. They will want to know as much as they can before they come looking for you.'
'Let them come. I'm ready for them.'
'No, you're not. This isn't the first time that the Feyre and mankind have come into conflict and one thing you can say for humanity is that they learn. As far as they are concerned you are a threat to security. You'll be on every terrorist list, every warning screen. They will use everything at their disposal. They will monitor CCTV, intercept communications, watch your house, your friends, your family. When they find you they will come armed with guns loaded with soft iron bullets specifically designed to kill fey. You're a threat to them and they will want you dead.'
I looked to Blackbird, but she just shrugged, confirming his words.
'You're crashing around like a pig at a goose fair and it'll get you nowhere. They will block you at every turn, anticipate your every move, and wait for their opportunity to eliminate the threat. Am I getting through?'
'I can't leave her there. I just can't.'
'If you'd come to me, we might have been able to steal her from them before they realised what we were doing. Now you've kicked the hornet's nest there's no chance. If you want to rescue her you are going to need help. We are the Warders. We watch each other's backs. We look after our own and even though you are not a full Warder yet, that still includes you. You have taken the oath, you are sworn to protect the council. I want to help you, Niall, but I have other things on my plate and in case you haven't noticed, you and Blackbird are homeless. I would have thought that concern for your unborn son was high on your list.'
'You don't need to remind me.'
'Don't I? Were you thinking of Blackbird and your son when you froze an entire forest?'
'That was different. I didn't intend…'
'Whether you intended to or not, the effect was the same. You want Alex back. I understand, and I will help you. But right now you're just making it worse – worse for you, worse for Blackbird and worse for Alex.'
I turned back to the view across the valley. I could feel the need to do something like a knot between my shoulder blades. He was right, though. I had messed this up badly.
I turned back. 'When? When will you help me?'
Garvin looked at the ceiling. 'What do you want me to do, Niall? Make you an appointment?'
'How long…' The knot was getting tighter. 'How long does she have to stay there?'
'You will get one chance at this, Niall. If you do it wrong you will either end up captive yourself or you will force them to dispose of Alex.'
'Dispose! What do you mean, dispose?' I was shouting.
His voice was calm in the face of my anger. 'You know perfectly well what I mean. If you back them into a corner you will force them to make a decision. Eliminating the risk is an option. You getting angry won't change that, it will only make it worse. Right now she's useful to them and while she's useful they will look after her. It's not perfect but it's the best alternative for the meantime.'
'You said that before. You said I should leave her there.'
'I was trying to persuade you not to antagonise them any further. It's bad enough as it is.'
'You're asking me to sit on my hands and wait.'
'There is plenty you can do. You can complete your training, for a start. Even basic tactics should tell you that you learn everything you can about your target before you make contact. Discover their weaknesses, assess their resources, watch their tactics. Find out about them while they're finding out about you. You've been learning, Niall, but it's been slow. You haven't pushed yourself beyond what you think you're capable of. Now you have an incentive.'
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He was talking sense. I needed to do this once and do it right.
'When can we start?'
'We can start tomorrow. Tonight you need some rest and to think about what I said.'
'Very well, but we start tomorrow.'
'Food will be brought up to you. The council are meeting tonight, so stay in your rooms and keep your heads down. They'll be gone by the morning and we can start extending your training. Until then, no more experiments, OK? Get some rest. You'll need a clear head tomorrow.' He turned and left, closing the doors quietly behind him.
I stayed looking out at the darkened countryside while Blackbird inspected the room. Our clothes had been carefully hung up in separate wardrobes and our personal belongings sequestered in chests and drawers. Someone had done our moving in for us.
I felt Blackbird's hand on my back, stroking softly downwards. 'The important thing is that you haven't lost her.'
'I haven't got her back, either.'
'You will.'
'Yes. I will.'
'Want a bath? I could do with it. We both smell of smoke.'
'OK. You go ahead.'
'It's big enough for two.'
I turned and there was a hesitancy there. I thought about what she had said while we sat on the sofa, about pushing her away and keeping her at a distance. I wondered how much she was hurt by that.
'Is it big enough for three?' I asked.
There was just a hint of a smile as she stroked her hand down over her tummy. 'He doesn't mind sharing.'
We ran a deep bath with lots of bubbles and sank into the water, filling the bathroom with steam. The warmth of the water eased my tired muscles and I was able to relax a little for the first time since the news about Alex. Closing my eyes, I found myself going through what had happened again in my head, until Blackbird leaned forward and took a scoop of bubbles, clapping her hands together in front of my nose so that they exploded in my face.
I spluttered, wiping away the foam.
'You're doing it again,' she said.
'Right,' I said. 'In that case…' I caught her foot from under the water and tickled her toes as she splashed and wriggled, persisting until she begged for mercy, claiming that I would make the baby ticklish. We called a peace and she soaped my back and then I hers. Finally she got out and sat on the stool to get dry. I washed my hair to rid myself of the last of the smoky taint then pulled the drain plug.
Once dry I took the body butter that I had bought in a moment of paternal inspiration and rubbed it into her stretched belly, smoothing it over her pale skin and easing it into the stretch marks. The baby liked this as he moved around at first and then settled, letting Blackbird relax under my hand.
I was only allowed to put the balm away after I had massaged it into her feet and hands as well and then rubbed her back and shoulders.
'I should make you do that every day. It was wonderful.'
'I live to serve, Mistress,' I told her.
She punched me gently in the buttock, but some of the tiredness had gone out of her and I began to wonder if I should do exactly that.
'I'll go see if I can rustle us up something to eat,' I told her.
I opened the bathroom door, then closed it again as I realised that our needs had been anticipated again. There was a young woman standing in our room with a trolley. I grabbed a towelling robe from the back of the door and wrapped it quickly around me, then slipped through the gap where Blackbird was still naked behind me.
'Good evening. My name's Angela. Mullbrook sends his compliments and asks if you would like wine with your meal, or water, or something else perhaps?'
She was dressed in austere white cotton, her doublebreasted top buttoned up around her neck and an apron around her waist.
'Just water, if that's OK?'
