'I'll leave you both still and sparkling.'
She had already set out plates, cutlery and glasses. She took bowls and dishes from the trolley and set them out in measured symmetry while I wondered whether I should be giving her a tip. She saved a metal cover until last, lifting it with a flourish, revealing a bowl of lamb chops, long bones arrayed to form a many-pointed star. My mouth watered as the smell of rosemary and garlic reached me.
'I'll leave you to enjoy your meal. Leave the trolley outside the door when you have finished, if that's convenient for you.'
'Of course.' I echoed her words.
She bowed and reversed to the door, shutting it almost silently behind her.
'Can I come out?' It was Blackbird, peeping from the bathroom door. 'You pinched my robe.'
'She's gone now. Dinner's here.'
'How long was she here?'
'Long enough to hear you trying to drown me in the bath, I think. We'll be the scandal of the lower stairs.' I slipped the robe from my shoulders and eased her into it so that she could sit at the table and eat. I grabbed some clean pants and a shirt and joined her at the table.
'Would Madame like sparkling or still?'
'Don't. If they hear you they might be offended and I can't bear the thought of tripe.'
I poured her still water as I knew the sparkling would give her gripes. Almost everything gave her gripes. That didn't stop her tucking into the chops though. She had stripped two down to the bones by the time I sat down.
'I could get used to this lifestyle, having people wash, cook and clean for me,' I told her.
'You don't get much privacy, though, do you? Everyone's sifting through your smalls.'
'It's a small price to pay for this sort of comfort.'
'It'll make you lazy and fat. You don't want to be a lard tub, do you?'
'I don't think Garvin will allow that to happen.' I had put on weight since starting Garvin's regime, but none of it was fat.
We settled into gentle conversation, avoiding the events of the day. The food was delicious, the chops still pink in the middle and complemented by crispy roast potatoes and steamed sugar snap peas. I ate sparingly, but Blackbird was apparently famished.
'Don't you like them?' Blackbird nodded to the remaining chops.
'I'm just tired. It's been a strange day.'
She reached forward for another chop.
'You'll be complaining of heartburn in the night.'
She retracted her hand, settling for sucking her fingers. 'You're right. I won't sleep if I eat too much. Being pregnant makes me greedy.'
I smiled at her, remembering the months when she had barely eaten and the very smell of cooked food had her running for a bucket.
We re-stacked the trolley and I left it outside the door. Then we went to bed, Blackbird curled under my arm, the bump resting against my hip. We were both tired and she was quickly asleep. I lay in the dark, the sound of her restful breathing easing my heart if not my mind. Once again, I found myself going back through the events of the past days, trying to figure out what I could have done. I thought about how they had misled me without lying to me, turned aside my demands for information with platitudes. Garvin was right, they knew what they were doing. They must have realised that if Alex was part fey then there was a chance that either Katherine or I was too. They had been ready and they had planned well.
What if they thought Katherine was fey too? They knew I had tried to contact Alex and would assume that she had gained her fey heritage from me, but that didn't mean Katherine wasn't fey too. They would look for signs in both parents, and while they were hunting for me, they would be watching her. Should I warn her? If I did, I would have to explain everything, just when she was starting to trust me again. It would be my fault that Alex had inherited fey blood and all the old wounds would reopen. If I didn't warn her, she would continue to act naturally and normally and they would leave her alone. It was probably better not to bring attention to her, but my conscience still pricked me with guilt. I was shying away from the real problem, which was telling Katherine the truth. I told myself it was for the best.
I thought of my daughter and where she might be. I thought of reaching out through the mirror in the room and searching for her, but I had promised not to. I would do as Garvin said and learn what I could about my daughter's kidnappers before I tested myself against them again. With that thought I drifted finally into sleep.
I knew it was a dream immediately. I had been here before. I shouldn't be here, though. The person who had brought me to this frozen glade was dead, killed by Blackbird's hand. The crisp pine needles, stiff with frost, crunched under my bare feet. The tree branches draped, the long needles dragging across my naked skin as I brushed past them. I knew where this path led.
The glade was empty when I reached it, but then it always was at first. I hesitated. She had caught me here before, leeching the warmth from my bones to feed on my life essence. How could she be here? She was dead. Another like her? There must be others. I turned around. The path behind me had vanished, the trees clustering closely where I had walked only moments ago.
I stepped into the glade where the sky opened into a black bowl pierced with crystal pinpricks. The stars never blinked here, no matter what evil transpired.
I turned around, half expecting to see a grey figure in a long dress: Solandre, the shade who had brought me here to feed on me. Nothing stirred. No wind brushed the pines, no animal crept in the dense brush. There was a noise, a distant banging. I turned, trying to locate the source. It shifted direction, coming first from behind me, then from the sides. Then I was awake.
The banging was coming from the door to our rooms.
Blackbird groaned. 'Tell them we don't want any.'
I slid out of bed, my skin chill in the darkness, and pulled on the white robe that Blackbird had used earlier.
The hammering repeated itself. 'OK, I'm coming.' I opened the door.
Tate was poised to resume hammering. 'Garvin wants you downstairs, five minutes ago, dressed for combat,' he said.
'Do you know what time it is?'
'No more than two minutes. I'll wait.'
'What does he want?'
'You. Now.' Tate's eyebrows raised slightly as if he was surprised by the question.
'Is this some sort of drill?'
'No. One minute forty-five seconds.'
I closed the door. The light clicked on behind me.
'What does he want?' asked Blackbird.
'Search me. I have to go. I'll be back later.'
I pulled drawers open. Tate had said fighting clothes. That meant boots, heavy trousers, tight T-shirt. Nothing to encumber or snag. I dressed inside a minute and went back to the bed.
'Try and get some sleep. I'll tell you what this was about later.' I kissed her forehead.
'I'm awake now.'
'Don't worry. Snuggle down. I'll be back in a bit.'
'Be careful.'
'It's nothing. Go back to sleep.'
I slipped through the door and found Tate leaning against the wall. He pushed himself forward and didn't break stride as he walked away.
'Will you tell me what this is about?'
'No.'
'Because you can't or because you won't?'
'Both.'
I followed him downstairs to the practice room. All the Warders were there. Amber lounged against the wall
