Ghost Story

2

After the other two had left, Ricky stayed behind, telling them that he was in no hurry to get out into that cold. Lewis had said, 'It'll put blood in your cheeks, Ricky,' but Dr. Jaffrey had merely nodded-it really was unseasonably cold for October, cold enough for snow. Sitting alone in the library while Sears went off to freshen up their drinks, Ricky could hear the ignition of Lewis's car grinding away in the street. Lewis had a Morgan which he'd imported from England five years before, and it was the only sports car Ricky had really liked the looks of. But the canvas top wouldn't be much protection on a night like this; and Lewis seemed to be having a lot of trouble getting the car to start. There. He'd nearly got it. In these New York winters, you really needed something bigger than Lewis's little Morgan. Poor John would be frozen by the time Lewis got him home to Milly Sheehan and the big house on Montgomery Street, around the corner and seven blocks up. Milly'd be sitting in the semi-dark of the doctor's waiting rooms, keeping herself awake so that she could jump up as soon as she heard his key in the door, help him off with his coat and pour a little hot chocolate into him. As Ricky sat listening, the Morgan's engine coughed into life-he heard them drive away and pictured Lewis clapping a hat on his head, grinning at John and saying, 'Didn't I tell you this little beauty would perform?' After he'd dropped John off, he'd leave town altogether, zipping along Route 17 until he was out in the woods, and go back to the place he'd bought when he had returned. Whatever else Lewis had done in Spain, he had earned a lot of money.

Ricky's own home was literally just around the corner, not a five-minute walk away; in the old days he and Sears had walked to their office in town every day. In warm weather they sometimes still did: 'Mutt and Jeff,' as Stella said. This was directed more at Sears than himself-Stella had never actually liked Sears. Of course she had never let this submerged dislike interfere with her attempts to dominate him a little. There was no question that Stella would be waiting up with hot chocolate: she'd have gone to sleep hours ago, leaving only a hall light burning upstairs. It was Stella's conviction that if he was going to indulge himself at his friends' houses and leave her behind, he could knock around in the dark when he got home, bumping his knees on the glass and chrome modern furniture she had made him buy.

Sears came back into the room with two drinks in his hands and a freshly fired-up cigar in his mouth. Ricky said, 'Sears, you're probably the only person I know to whom I could admit that sometimes I wish I'd never got married.'

'Don't waste your envy on me,' Sears said. 'I'm too old, too fat and too tired.'

'You're none of those things,' he answered, accepting the drink Sears gave him, 'you just have the luxury of being able to pretend you are.'

'Oh, but you pulled out the prize plum,' Sears said. 'The reason you wouldn't say what you've just said to anyone else is that they'd be stupefied. Stella is a famous beauty. And if you said it to her, she'd brain you.' He sat back in the chair he'd occupied earlier, stretched his legs out and crossed them at the ankles. 'She'd slap a box together, dump you in it, bury you in five seconds flat and then run off with an athletic forty-year-old smelling of salt water and bay rum. The reason you can tell me is that-' Sears paused, and Ricky feared that he'd say, I sometimes wish you'd never married too. 'Is it that I am hors de combat, or is it hors commerce?'

Listening to his partner's voice, holding his drink, Ricky thought of John Jaffrey and Lewis Benedikt speeding away to their houses, of his own redecorated house waiting, and was aware of how settled their lives were; of how much they had found a comfortable routine. 'Well, which is it?' Sears asked, and he replied, 'Oh, in your case hors de combat, I'm sure,' and smiled, stingingly aware of their closeness. He remembered what he had said before, all change is change for the worse, and thought: that's true, God help us. Ricky suddenly saw all of them, his old friends and himself, as on a fragile invisible plane suspended high up in dark air.

'Does Stella know you have nightmares?' Sears asked.

'Well, I didn't know that you did,' Ricky answered, as though it were a joke.

'I saw no reason to discuss it.'

'And you've been having them for-?'

Sears leaned further into his chair. 'You've had yours for-?'

'A year.'

'And I. For a year. So have the other two, apparently.'

'Lewis doesn't seem ruffled.'

'Nothing ruffles Lewis. When the Creator made Lewis, he said, 'I am going to give you a handsome face, a good constitution and an equable temperament, but because this is an imperfect world, I'll hold back a little on brains.' He got rich because he liked Spanish fishing villages, not because he knew what was going to happen to them.'

Ricky ignored this-it was all part of the way Sears liked to characterize Lewis. 'They started after Edward's death?'

Sears nodded his massive head.

'What do you think happened to Edward?'

Sears shrugged. They had all asked the question too many times. 'As you are surely aware, I know no more than you.'

'Do you think we'll be any happier if we find out?'

'Goodness, what a question! I can't answer that one either, Ricky.'

'Well, I don't. I think something terrible will happen to us. I think you'll bring down disaster on us if you invite that young Wanderley.'

'Superstition,' Sears grumbled. 'Nonsense. I think something terrible has already happened to us, and this young Wanderley might be the man who can clear it up.'

'Did you read his book?'

'The second one? I looked at it.'

This was an admission that he had read it.

'What did you think?'

'A nice exercise in genre writing. More literary than most. A few nice phrases, a reasonably well-constructed plot.'

'But about his insights…'

'I think he won't immediately dismiss us as a bunch of old fools. That's the main thing.'

'Oh, I wish he would,' Ricky wailed. 'I don't want anybody poking around in our lives. I want things just to keep on going.'

'But it's possible that he will 'poke around,' as you say, and end by convincing us that we are just spooking ourselves. Then maybe Jaffrey will stop scourging himself for that blasted party. He only insisted on it because he wanted to meet that worthless little actress. That Moore girl.'

'I think about that party a lot,' Ricky said. 'I've been trying to remember when I saw her that night.'

'I saw her,' said Sears. 'She was talking to Stella.'

'That's what everybody says. Everybody saw her talking to my wife. But where did she go afterward?'

'You're getting as bad as John. Let's wait for young Wanderley. We need a fresh eye.'

'I think we'll be sorry,' said Ricky, trying for one last time. 'I think we'll be ruined. We'll be like some animal eating its own tail. We have to put it behind us.'

'It's decided. Don't be melodramatic.'

So that was that. Sears could not be swayed. Ricky asked him about another of the things on his mind. 'On our evenings, do you always know what you're going to say in advance, when it's your turn?'

Sears's eyes met his, marvelously, cloudlessly blue. 'Why?'

'Because I don't. Not most of the time. I just sit and wait, and then it comes to me, like tonight. Is it that way with you?'

'Often. Not that it proves anything.'

'Is it like that for the others too?'

'I see no reason why it shouldn't be. Now, Ricky, I want to get some rest and you should go home. Stella