Oh, is he going to take you for a nice drive?
ALGERNON
He's going to send me away.
CECILY
Then have we got to part?
ALGERNON
I am afraid so. It's very painful parting.
CECILY
It is always painful to part from people whom one has known for a
very brief space of time. The absence of old friends one can endure with
equanimity. But even a momentary separation from anyone to whom one
has just been introduced is almost unbearable.
ALGERNON
Thank you. [Enter MERRIMAN.] MERRIMAN The dogcart is at the door, sir. [ALGERNON looks appealingly at CECILY.]
CECILY
It can wait, Merriman . . . for . . . five minutes. MERRIMAN Yes, Miss. [Exit MERRIMAN.] ALGERNON
I hope, Cecily, I shall not offend you if I state quite frankly and
openly that you seem to me to be in every way the visible personification of
absolute perfection.
CECILY
I think your frankness does you great credit, Ernest. If you will allow me I will copy your remarks into my diary. [Goes over to table and begins writing in diary.]
ALGERNON
Do you really keep a diary? I'd give anything to look at it. May I?
CECILY
Oh no. [Pitts her hand over it.] You see, it is simply a very young girl's record of her own thoughts and impressions, and consequently meant for
publication. When it appears in volume form I hope you will order a copy.
But pray, Ernest, don't stop. I delight in taking down from dictation. I have
reached 'absolute perfection.' You can go on. I am quite ready for more. ALGERNON [Somewhat taken aback.] Ahem! Ahem! CECILY
Oh, don't cough, Ernest. When one is dictating one should speak fluently and not cough. Besides, I don't know how to spell a cough. [Writes as ALGERNON speaks.]
ALGERNON [Speaking very rapidly.] Cecily, ever since I first looked upon your wonderful and incomparable beauty, I have dared to love you wildly, pas
sionately, devotedly, hopelessly.
CECILY
I don't think that you should tell me that you love me wildly, pas
sionately, devotedly, hopelessly. Hopelessly doesn't seem to make much
sense, does it?
ALGERNON
Cecily!
[Enter MERRIMAN.]
MERRIMAN
The dogcart is waiting, sir.
ALGERNON
Tell it to come round next week, at the same hour. MERRIMAN [Looks at CECILY, who makes no sign.] Yes, sir. [MERRIMAN retires.]
CECILY
Uncle Jack would be very much annoyed if he knew you were staying
on till next week, at the same hour.
ALGERNON
