ask him. . . . [Reproachfully.] What? What? You are hoping? You still want to hope? And what am I hoping for? My God! don't make me despise myself! [Drops her head on her arms. RAKITIN comes in from the study, pale and agitated.]
RAKITIN [going up to NATALYA PETROVNA]. Natalya Petrovna.... [She does not stir.] [To himself.] What can have happened with Vera? [Aloud.] Natalya Petrovna....
NATALYA PETROVNA [raising her head]. Who is it? Ah! you.
RAKITAN. Vera Alexandrovna told me you were unwell. ...I...
NATALYA PETROVNA [turning away], I am quite well. ... What made her?. ..
RAKITIN. No! Natalya Petrovna, you are not well, you should see yourself.
NATALYA PETROVNA. Well, perhaps not. . . but what's that to you? What do you want? What have you come for?
RAKITIN [in a voice of deep feeling]. I'll tell you what I have come for. I have come to ask your forgiveness. Half an hour ago I was unspeakably stupid and rude. . . . Forgive me. . . . You see, Natalya Petrovna, however modest a man's desires and . . . and hopes, it is hard, for a moment anyway, for him to keep his head, when they are suddenly snatched away from him; but I have come to my senses. I understand my position and my fault, and I want only one thing . . . your forgiveness. [He gently sits down beside her.] Look at me . . . don't you too turn away from me. Beside you is your old Rakitin, your friend, a man who asks nothing but to be allowed to serve you, as you said ... to help you. Don't deprive me of your confidence, rely on me and forget that I ever. . . . Forget everything that may have wounded you. . . .
NATALYA PETROVNA [who has been all the while staring fixedly at the floor]. Yes, yes.... [Stopping.] Oh! I'm, sorry Rakitin, I haven't heard a word of what you've been saying.
RAKITIN [mournfully]. I said ... I begged you to forgive me, Natalya Petrovna, I asked you whether you would let me be your friend still.
NATALYA PETROVNA [slowly turning to him and laying her hands on his shoulders]. Rakitin, tell me, what's the matter with me?
RAKITIN [After a pause]. You're in love.
NATALYA PETROVNA [slowly repeating it after him]. I'm in love.. .. But it's madness, Rakitin, it's impossible. Can such things happen all of a sudden. . . . You say I'm in love. . . . [Breaks off.]
RAKITIN. Yes, you're in love, poor dear woman. . . . Don't deceive yourself.
NATALYA PETROVNA [not looking at him.] What am I to do?
RAKITIN. I can tell you, Natalya Petrovna, if you promise . . .
NATALYA PETROVNA [interrupting, still without looking at him]. You know that girl, Vera, loves him. . . They are in love with each other....
RAKITIN. If so, a reason the more...
NATALYA PETROVNA [interrupting again]. I've long suspected it, but she acknowledged it herself. . . just now.
RAKITIN [in a low voice, as though to himself]. Poor woman!
NATALYA PETROVNA [passing her hand over her face]. Come. ... I must pull myself together. I believe you were going to say something. . . . For God's sake, Rakitin, advise me what to do. ...
RAKITIN. I'm willing to advise you, Natalya Petrovna, only on one condition.
NATALYA PETROVNA. Tell me.
RAKITIN. Promise that you won't suspect my motives. Tell me that you believe in my disinterested desire to help you; do you help me too. Let your confidence give me strength, or else let me keep silence.
NATALYA PETROVNA. Speak, speak.
RAKITIN. You have no doubt of me?
NATALYA PETROVNA. Speak!
RAKITIN. Well then, listen, he must go away. [NATALYA PETROVNA looks at him in silence.'] Yes, he must go. I'm not going to speak to you of... your husband, your duty. On my lips, such words are . . . out of place. . . . But those children love each other. You told me so yourself just now, imagine yourself now between them. . . . Why, your position will be awful!
NATALYA PETROVNA. He must go. ... [A pause.] And you? You remain?
RAKITIN [confused]. I?... I?... [Apause.] I must go too. For the sake of your peace, your happiness, Verotchka's happiness, both he ... and I ... we must both go away for ever.
NATALYA PETROVNA. Rakitin ... I have sunk so low that I ... was almost ready to sacrifice that poor girl, an orphan entrusted to me by my mother, to marry her to a stupid, absurd old man! I couldn't bring myself to it, Rakitin, the words died away on my lips when she burst out laughing at the suggestion . . . but I have been plotting with the doctor; I have put up with his meaning smiles, I have borne with his grins, his compliments, his hints. . . . Oh, I feel I am on the brink of a precipice; save me!
RAKITIN. Natalya Petrovna, you see that I am right.. . . [She is silent; he goes on hurriedly.] He ought to go ... we ought both to go. ... There is no other way to save you.
NATALYA PETROVNA [dejectedly]. But what to live for afterwards?
RAKITIN Good God, is it as bad as that? . . . Natalya Petrovna, you will get over it, believe me. . . . This will pass. What, nothing to live for!
NATALYA PETROVNA. Yes, yes, what have I to live for when all abandon me?
RAKITIN. But . . . your family. . . . [NATALYA PETROVNA looks down.] If you like, after he is gone, I might stay a few days j ust to . . .
NATALYA PETROVNA [gloomily]. Ah! I understand. You are reckoning on habit, on our old friendship. . . . You hope I shall come to myself, and turn to you again, don't you? I understand you.
RAKITIN [flushing]. Natalya Petrovna! Why do you insult me?
NATALYA PETROVNA [bitterly]. I understand you . . . but you are mistaken.
RAKITIN. What? After your promise, when simply for your sake, your sake only, for your happiness, for your position in society, in fact. . .
NATALYA PETROVNA. Oh! how long have you been concerned about that? Why is it you have never spoken of it before?
RAKITIN [getting up]. Natalya Petrovna, I will leave this place to-day, at once, and you shall never see me again. . . . [Is going.]
NATALYA PETROVNA [stretching out her hands to him]. Michel, forgive me; I don't know what I'm saying. . . . You see the state I'm in. Forgive me.
RAKITIN [turning rapidly to her and taking her by the hands]. Natalya Petrovna . . .
NATALYA PETROVNA. Oh, Michel, I'm unutterably miserable. . . . [Leans on his shoulder and presses her handkerchief to her eyes.] Help me, I am lost without you. [At that instant the door of the outer room is flung open, and ISLAYEV and ANNA SEMYONOVNA walk in.]
ISLAYEV [loudly]. I was always of that opinion. [Stops in amazement at the sight of RAKITIN and NATALYA PETROVNA. NATALYA PETROVNA looks round and goes out quickly. RAKITIN remains where he is, overwhelmed with confusion.]
ISLAYEV [to RAKITIN]. What's the meaning of this? What's this scene?
RAKITIN. Oh . . . nothing . . . it's . . .
ISLAYEV. Is Natalya Petrovna unwell?
RAKITIN. No . . . but. . .
ISLAYEV. And why has she run away so suddenly? What were you talking about? She seemed to be crying.... You were consoling her... . What's the matter?
