head up over the desk.
'Jeeves,' I said, and if there were tears in the eyes, what of it? We Woosters are not afraid to confess honest emotion, 'there is none like you, none.'
'It is extremely kind of you to say so, sir.'
'It was all I could do to keep from leaping out and shaking your hand.'
'It would scarcely have been judicious, in the circumstances, sir.'
'That's what I thought. Your father wasn't a snake-charmer, was he, Jeeves?'
'No, sir.'
'It just crossed my mind. What do you think will happen when old Stoker gets to the Dower House?'
'We can only conjecture, sir.'
'My fear is that Brinkley may have slept it off by now.'
'There is that possibility, sir.'
'Still, it was a kindly thought, sending the fellow there, and we must hope for the best. After all, Brinkley still has that chopper. I say, do you think Chuffy is really coming down?'
'At any moment, I fancy, sir.'
'Then you wouldn't advise my eating his breakfast?'
'No, sir.'
'But I'm starving, Jeeves.'
'I am extremely sorry, sir. The position at the moment is a little difficult. Later on, no doubt, I may be able to alleviate your distress.'
'Have you had breakfast, Jeeves?'
'Yes, sir.'
'What did you have?'
'The juice of an orange, sir, followed by Cute Crispies – an American cereal – scrambled eggs with a slice of bacon, and toast and marmalade.'
'Oh, gosh! The whole washed down, no doubt, with a cup of strengthening coffee?'
'Yes, sir.'
'Oh, my God! You really don't think I could just sneak a single sausage?'
'I would scarcely advocate it, sir. And it is a small point, but his lordship is having kippers.'
'Kippers!'
'And this, I fancy, will be his lordship coming now, sir.'
So down once more into the lower levels for Bertram. And I had hardly fitted myself into the groove when the door opened.
A voice spoke.
'Why, hallo, Jeeves.'
'Good morning, miss.'
It was Pauline Stoker.
I must say I was a bit peeved. Chuffnell Hall, whatever its other defects, should, as I have pointed out, have been entirely free from Stokers. And here they were, absolutely overrunning the place like mice. I was quite prepared to find something breathing in my ear and look round and see little Dwight. I mean to say, I was feeling – bitterly, I admit – that if this was going to be an Old Home Week of Stokers, one might as well make the thing complete.
Pauline had begun to sniff vigorously.
'What's that I smell, Jeeves?'
'Kippered herrings, miss.'
'Whose?'
'His lordship's, miss.'
'Oh. I haven't had breakfast yet, Jeeves.'
'No, miss?'
'No. Father yanked me out of bed and had me half-way here before I was properly awake. He's all worked up, Jeeves.'
'Yes, miss. I have just been having a conversation with Mr Stoker. He did appear somewhat overwrought.'
'All the way here he was talking about what he was going to do if he ever found you again. And now you tell me he did find you. What happened? Didn't he eat you?'
'No, miss.'
'Probably on a diet. Well, where has he got to? They told me he was in here.'
'Mr Stoker left a moment ago with the intention of visiting the Dower House, miss. I think he hopes to find Mr Wooster there.'
'Somebody ought to warn that poor sap.'
'You need experience no anxiety for Mr Wooster, miss. He is not at the Dower House.'
'Where is he?'
'Elsewhere, miss.'
'Not that I care where he is. Do you remember my telling you last night, Jeeves, that I was thinking of becoming Mrs Bertram W.?'
'Yes, miss.'
'Well, I'm not. So you needn't save up for that fish slice, after all. I've changed my mind.'
'I am glad to hear that, miss.'
So was I. Her words were music to my ears.
'Glad, are you?'
'Yes, miss. I doubt whether the union would have been a successful one. Mr Wooster is an agreeable young gentleman, but I would describe him as essentially one of Nature's bachelors.'
'Besides being mentally negligible?'
'Mr Wooster is capable of acting very shrewdly on occasion, miss.'
'So am I. And that is why I say that, no matter if father does tear the roof off, I am not going to marry that poor, persecuted lamb. Why should I? I've nothing against him.'
There was a pause.
'I've just been talking to Lady Chuffnell, Jeeves.'
'Yes, miss.'
'Apparently she has had a little domestic trouble, too.'
'Yes, miss. There was an unfortunate rift between her ladyship and Sir Roderick Glossop last night. Now, I am glad to say, her ladyship appears to have thought matters over and decided that she made a mistake in severing relations with the gentleman.'
'One does think things over, doesn't one?'
'Almost invariably, miss.'
'And a fat lot of use that is, if the severed relation doesn't think them over too. Have you seen Lord Chuffnell this morning, Jeeves?'
'Yes, miss.'
'How was he looking?'
'Somewhat worried, it seemed to me, miss.'
'He was?'
'Yes, miss.'
'H'm. Well, I won't keep you from your professional duties, Jeeves; smack into them right away, as far as I'm concerned.'
'Thank you, miss. Good morning.'
For some moments after the door closed I remained motionless. I was passing the position of affairs under thoughtful review. To a certain extent you might say that relief was tingling through the veins like some rare wine, causing satisfaction and mental uplift. In the plainest possible language, weighing her words and speaking without dubiety or equivocation, this girl Pauline had stated that not even the strongest measures on the part of her father
