some ancient eruption. She was also dressed in more ostentatious style than most Spartan matrons, with an ankle- length linen tunic of blinding white, a wide sky blue girdle, and a cloak folded and draped around her shoulders. Her ears shed pendants of gold hanging from filigreed rosettes. It was the kind of kit designed to arrogate all the attention to herself, provoking furtive glances from the Spartan men and outright hostility from the women.
“I suppose you’ll want to give that to me,” she said to him in lieu of a greeting. It was the first time he heard her voice in years.
“I think so.”
“Come walk with me,” she said, taking the plaque under her arm. “I have something to tell you.”
As she led him away from the sanctuary, he saw that she wasn’t alone. Two helots-one female and one male-detached themselves from the background to follow them. The latter, who was dressed in a short household tunic with one shoulder bare, revealed his curiosity with nervous, darting glances from the ground to Antalcidas and back again. The female was dressed to match her mistress, though with only a thin girdle and no cloak, and had perfected the ancient helot art of being physically available while mentally elsewhere.
When they were well outside the village, Damatria ordered the servants out of earshot. Turning to Antalcidas, she said nothing at first as she regarded his naked body from head to toe, then reached out to feel the veneer of olive oil applied to his skin for the ceremony. Damatria had not planned to touch him; it was an act done out of impulse, sparked perhaps by surprise at his unexpected maturity. She never lost track of how old he was, of course-that was difficult in a city divided into age-classes. But that knowledge counted little against her recollection of the small boy she had given up eleven years before. In the end she allowed her face to reflect her approval. Despite the coarseness of his face, he had grown up well.
“I am going to say something to you, and I want you to keep your peace until I am finished.”
He kept his peace.
“Well then…” she began, now tempted to delay despite the importance of her charge. “You should know first that you have fulfilled your duty so far. Molobrus would have been pleased…”
He glanced down at the plaque at her side. It occurred to him that she had yet to as much as glance at the inscription.
“What pride you must have! What vindication against your cold, uncaring mother! Yes I think you must feel that, though that all may change when I tell you something that will… surprise you. Understand that I say this not to diminish what you’ve done. If it is worth diminishing, that is for you to decide. I tell you because, as you know, an Equal must always look truth in the face.”
He wondered if she took him for a weakling. For why else would she hesitate? When have mere words ever harmed a man of any courage? He opened his mouth to interject, but she cut him off.
“You are not of Molobrus’ blood. That is something not even he knew.”
She paused to watch him. In his detestable, servile face, that reflection of an original that still came to her in her nightmares, she saw nothing but a brief flash of confusion, a momentary flickering in his eyes. His mouth softened, as if something mildly foul had passed down his throat.
“I can’t tell you who your father was. All you need to know is that he was a helot, and that he is dead. What matters more now, I think, is what you choose to do with this knowledge.”
Despite the years of training, the relentless drum-beat of injunctions to honor his gods, his ancestors, and his elders, Antalcidas felt the impulse to mock the stranger standing before him. The impulse manifested in a mildly ironic edge to his voice:
“So tell me, what would you say I do with this?”
“Don’t take that tone, boy! If I tell you the truth it doesn’t make me the fraud. Nor does it undo all that you have done-necessarily.”
“Does anyone else know?”
“Not yet. But how long do you believe it would take for it to become obvious? Aren’t there reasons why Spartiates rule helots-reasons that show in their quality as men?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know if it would show. Maybe not for a long time… maybe never.”
“And even if you manage to hide it, how long would you force me to keep your secret? What a cruel thing to expect of me, to go on lying in this way!”
She lifted her hand to wipe away a well-timed tear.
“Like I said, that is your decision to make. Endius tells me you have a good mind, so you must already see your choices.”
All he could see at that moment was the web of creases, spread over the left side of her face, marring what was still a formidable beauty. It was the beauty seen on the faces of cult statues, Athena-the-Protectoress or Aphrodite-the-Warlike or Artemis-the-Right-Way. He was fortunate that she had only one eye, because he could not bear the scrutiny of another.
“You might sacrifice yourself,” she continued. “In truth, that is a course that would reflect well on you.”
Though he could not believe his ears, she appeared to be speaking in all seriousness.
“How you do it is your business. You could accomplish it in the field, against our enemies. You know now that you cannot become a true Spartiate, though you might learn to act like one. That would probably be best…”
“Who are you?” he asked her. “Is this the way a mother speaks?”
“Is this how a son honors his mother, with interruptions? If you kept silent, you would hear another option that may please you more. Do you want to hear it?”
He shook his head, the accumulating absurdities beginning to crack his reserve. Sweat was beginning to mix with the oil on his skin.
“You should know that your brother Epitadas is properly the son of Molobrus. For some time now I have been arranging for his advancement. I won’t say how, but you may well guess. What I suggest is that you become my partner in this task.”
“Your partner?”
“I want you to support him, to do all you can to advance his interests. Devote yourself to his success. I would think that would hardly be a burden at all for a brother! Do what you would do anyway.”
“What can I do for him? I hardly know him.”
“I trust that you’ll know what to do when the time comes.”
“And what of the secret that is too terrible for you to keep?”
She smiled. “I’m asking you to serve, which should be entirely in your nature. As for myself-knowledge of Epitadas’ safety would come as a great relief-if you take my meaning.”
Her meaning, to exchange her silence for his support of Epitadas, was clear. What was also clear was her ignorance of the fact that, of his own free will, Antalcidas had already done his fraternal duty to Epitadas by covering for him in the Thibron affair.
For Damatria’s part, she could see from the dyspeptic expression on his face that he needed to hear nothing more. She wondered what he was thinking, but decided that beyond assuring that he did as she asked, it didn’t matter. She turned to the helots.
“You! Come here.”
The male came forward.
“Should you choose what is best for your family, your family has a gift for you,” she said to Antalcidas. “Now that you have finished the Rearing, you may have your first attendant. Helot, introduce yourself.”
The helot lifted his eyes only long enough to pronounce his name, “Doulos.” Antalcidas looked at him: he was young, perhaps no older than himself, and he was short and thin, with the pale skin and soft hands of someone who had never driven plow or spear.
“There’s not much to the boy, I agree,” said Damatria. “But you’ll see that he has certain talents… that is, if you agree to my proposal. Should he stay with you, then?”
Now both his mother and the helot were looking at him. Under the circumstances Antalcidas thought it was absurd to expect him to agree to anything. He heaved his shoulders in a gesture as much of despair as of assent. Pleased, Damatria held out the back of her hand to him.
“Good! Now give your mother a kiss.”
Looking at her standing there, so splendid and terrible, his urge to perversity mastered him at last. Her assurance maddened him; he wanted to spring a striking revelation of his own, though he had none to make. Instead of kissing her, he spat on those shapely knuckles and golden rings. Doulos’ eyes widened in panic.
