realized his addiction was back in full force; only this time it was sex rather than drinking. Her eyes pricked with tears, for she knew that she was the one who had pushed him over the edge. He was okay before she screwed everything up with Collins.
Her mind replayed the scene from yesterday, reliving the pain, like a bruise she couldn’t keep from touching. She went to him during rehearsal, early in the day. Since the incident, he had not so much as touched her, and a part of her knew it was over, but she had to try.
He had been standing apart from the others, just watching the scene around him. She noticed with a jolt that just like her, he had stopped his unconscious constant drumming. The rhythm they both lived with had disappeared.
“Richard?” She tried so hard to sound casual; she didn’t know why she even bothered. It wasn’t as if they could hide anything from each other. “I was wondering if you,” she stopped and licked her lips nervously. “I was wondering if we could be together tonight.”
Richard looked down uncomfortably and right then Charlotte knew she was in trouble. “I don’t think so, Char,” he had mumbled.
“’Kay,” she had responded, trying to hold in the hurt and keep an appearance of cool indifference.
“Char,” he said, his voice rising slightly. “I’m sorry.” His eyes looked at hers with a sadness that she didn’t understand.
Charlotte shrugged. “No big deal,” she lied. “I was just looking for a fuck.” She turned away and walked out for a cigarette.
She had four cigarettes before she was ready to return. When she did, she saw Richard already talking up a girl. Her rejection was complete. He had discarded her. Nicely, as gently and humanely as he could, but in the end, it was all the same. He had dumped her, and somewhere, somehow, he had come to mean more to her then she had ever realized.
And the horrible thing was, despite the pain she felt, despite the fact that she knew it was over, despite the fact she could see he was sick and damaged, she still loved him. She wished she didn’t. It would have made it so much simpler. He was giving her every chance to walk away, making it as easy for her as he could, and she couldn’t. She loved him, and with that love, she knew she was damned.
Winnie met the women and Alex at the airport. She smiled at them, leading them to a waiting limo. “So, how was your flight?” she asked brightly.
“It was fine,” Jane smiled back.
“Great!” she replied. “When we get to the set, I’ll introduce you to George and then we’ll get you into makeup and wardrobe.”
“George is the director?” Elizabeth asked.
“Yes, George Wickham,” Winnie explained. “He’s going to be directing this video, and the next one. He’s very good. I think you will really like him.”
“Great,” Elizabeth said with an embarrassed laugh. “I’m a little nervous, I was worried he would be hard to work with.”
Winnie smiled reassuringly. “Oh, no, Lizzy. George is very easy to work with. He’s very patient. And he understands that you’re a musician, not an actress. In fact, he used to sing himself.”
“Really?” Elizabeth asked.
“Yes, didn’t you know? He used to be in Slurry.”
“No,” Elizabeth looked at Jane and Charlotte to find similar expressions of surprise on their faces. “I had no idea.”
Winnie grinned at their reaction. “I don’t know all the details, but it’s true. He left the band about three years ago and started directing music videos instead,” she said with some indifference. “But the point is that he understands singers and you shouldn’t worry.”
Elizabeth smiled and looked forward with curiosity to meeting this man from Slurry’s past.
Darcy knocked on the door to Caroline’s room for their morning meeting. The tour personnel were given two days’ furlough to relax, but he was still working. He heard a soft giggle as the door opened.
Caroline stood there, looking content. She turned her head and Darcy saw with whom she was laughing; Faust was farther back in the room, clearly preparing to leave.
“Good morning, Darcy,” Caroline said brightly. “You’re right on time.” She closed the door and walked over to Faust.
“Good morning,” Darcy replied quietly. He was surprised, and more than a little uncomfortable, by what he saw. He realized with bitter irony that everyone on the tour was getting more action than he was. He tried to maintain a look of indifference.
Caroline laughed happily. “We were just saying I have to get back to the ‘grind.’”
Faust touched her shoulder and said, “I’ll see you later.” He passed Darcy with a nod and left the room.
Darcy looked at Caroline with frank curiosity. “Do you want to tell me something?”
Caroline refused to let Darcy ruin her good mood. “Nope,” she replied as she sat down at the table. “Shall we begin?”
Darcy’s hard stare didn’t change as he moved closer to the table.
Caroline grew annoyed. “Let’s make a deal; I’ll tell you everything about Faust and me, just as soon as you tell me
Darcy’s expression broke and he looked away. “I’m sorry, Caro. I was out of line. I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately.”
Caroline smiled and accepted his apology. “It’s all right. I really didn’t mean to rub it in your face like that. We’re all a little fried from the tour. Luckily, we have a couple of days off, then two more weeks of tour, then a nice long break. I think that will do us all some good.”
Darcy nodded; he was looking forward to the break. Looking forward to Georgie’s graduation and getting to spend some time with her. To getting to forget about being Fitzwilliam Darcy, rock star, for four weeks and just be himself.
“So, what are you going to do today?” Caroline asked him pleasantly.
Darcy frowned. “I have a teleconference scheduled with Misty at two, but that’s all. Maybe I’ll do some composing.”
“Charles told me he is going Jet Skiing on the lake. You might want to join him.” She tilted her head. “It’s been awhile since you two did anything together.”
Darcy had to agree with that. Between Charles’s whirlwind relationship with Jane, Darcy’s concerns over Georgie, Richard’s behavior, and the tour, he had barely even seen his best friend outside of their performances. He found that he missed spending time with Charles. “I’ve never been Jet Skiing,” he said quietly.
“Oh, Charles can teach you,” Caroline replied with a smile. “It’s not that hard.” She watched as he considered it. She might not be carrying a torch for Darcy anymore, but she still cared about him, as both a friend and an employer, and she knew he needed to stop brooding and get out and do something fun.
Darcy smiled briefly. “I’d like that.” His expression became more serious. “Now, what have you got for me?”
Caroline nodded and slipped into work mode. She quickly updated him on their schedule and how the tour was doing. Then she took a deep breath. She knew that Darcy was aware of everything she was going to say, but it had to be said. “What are you going to do about Richard?”
“What about him?”
Caroline frowned, seeing he wasn’t going to make this easy. “He’s blown off rehearsal three times in the last week, and last night he held up the show by eight minutes.”
“Eight minutes, Caro?” he said, lifting an eyebrow.
Caroline fixed him with a hard look. “He’s losing control again.”
Darcy looked away. “What’s going on with him and Charlotte?”
Caroline pursed her lips. “As far as I know,” she qualified, “it’s over. They haven’t been together since Thursday.”
“But we’ve been on buses most of that time. What about last night?”
