speak to someone who has! Put me through to Mr. Berquist.»
The stooge suddenly lost his smile and Jubal thought gleefully that he had at last pinked him. So he pushed on. «Well? Don't just sit there! Get Gil on your inside line and tell him you've kept Jubal Harshaw waiting.»
The face said woodenly, «We have no Mr. Berquist here.»
«I don't care where he is. Get him! If you don't know Gil Berquist, ask your boss. Mr. Gilbert Berquist, personal assistant to Mr. Douglas. If you work around the Palace you've seen Mr. Berquist — thirty-five, six feet and a hundred and eighty pounds, sandy hair thin on top, smiles a lot and has perfect teeth. If you don't dare disturb him, dump it in your boss's lap. Quit biting your nails and move!»
The young man said, «Please hold on. I will inquire.»
«I certainly will. Get me Gil.» The image was replaced by an abstract pattern; a voice said, «Please wait while your call is completed. This delay is not charged to your account. Please relax while — » Soothing music came up; Jubal sat back and looked around. Anne was reading, out of the telephone's vision angle. On his other side the Man from Mars was also out of pickup and was watching stereovision and listening via ear plugs.
Jubal reflected that he must have that obscene babble box returned to the basement. «What you got, son?» he asked, reached over and turned on the speaker.
Mike answered, «I don't know, Jubal.»
The sound confirmed what Jubal had feared: Smith was listening to a Fosterite service; the Shepherd was reading church notices: « — junior Spirit-in-Action team will give a demonstration, so come early and see the fur fly! Our team coach, Brother Hornsby, has asked me to tell you boys to fetch only your helmets, gloves, and sticks — we aren't going after sinners this time. However, the Little Cherubim will be on hand with their first-aid kits in case of excessive zeal.» The Shepherd paused and smiled broadly, «And now wonderful news, My Children! A message from Angel Ramzai for Brother Arthur Renwick and his good wife Dorothy. Your prayer has been approved and you will go to heaven at dawn Thursday morning! Stand up, Art! Stand up, Dottie! Take a bow!»
Camera made reverse cut, showing the congregation and centering on Brother and Sister Renwick. To wild applause and shouts of «
Camera cut back as the Shepherd held up his hand for silence. He went on briskly, «The Bon Voyage party starts at midnight and doors will be locked at that time — so get here early and let's make this the happiest revelry our flock has ever seen; we're all proud of Art and Dottie. Funeral services will be held thirty minutes after dawn, with breakfast immediately following for those who have to get to work early.» The Shepherd suddenly looked stern and camera zoomed in until his head filled the tank. «After our last Bon Voyage, the sexton found an empty pint bottle in one of the Happiness rooms — of a brand distilled by sinners. That's past and done; the brother who slipped confessed and paid penance sevenfold, even refusing the usual cash discount — I'm sure he won't backslide. But stop and think, My Children — Is it worth risking eternal happiness to save a few pennies on an article of worldly merchandise? Always look for that happy, holy seal-of-approval with Bishop Digby's smiling face on it. Don't let a sinner palm off on you something “just as good”. Our sponsors support us; they deserve your support. Brother Art, I'm sorry to have to bring up such a subject — »
«That's okay, Shepherd! Pour it on!»
« — at a time of such great happiness. But we must never forget that — » Jubal switched off the speaker circuit.
«Mike, that's not anything you need.»
«Not?»
«Uh — » Shucks, the boy was going to have to learn about such things. «All right, go ahead. But talk to me later.»
«Yes, Jubal.»
Harshaw was about to add advice to offset Mike's tendency to take literally anything he heard. But the telephone's «hold» music went down and out, and the screen filled with an image — a man in his forties whom Jubal labeled as «cop.»
Jubal said aggressively, «You aren't Gil Berquist.»
«What is your interest in Gilbert Berquist?»
Jubal answered with pained patience, «I wish to speak to him. See here, my good man, are you a public employee?»
The man hesitated. «Yes. You must — »
«I “must” nothing! I am a citizen and my taxes help pay your wages. All morning I have been trying to make a simple phone call — and I have been passed from one butterfly-brained bovine to another, every one of them feeding out of the public trough. And now
«You didn't answer my question.»
«Come, come! I don't have to; I am a private citizen. You are
The man answered tonelessly, «You are Doctor Jubal Harshaw. You are calling from — »
«So that's what took so long? That was stupid. My address can be obtained from any library, post office, or telephone information. As to who I am, everyone knows. Everyone who can read. Can you read?»
«Dr. Harshaw, I am a police officer and I require your cooperation. What is your reason — »
«Pooh, sir! I am a lawyer. A citizen is required to cooperate with police under certain conditions only. For example, during hot pursuit — in which case the police officer may still be required to show credentials. Is this “hot pursuit”, sir? Are you about to dive through this blasted instrument? Second, a citizen may be required to cooperate within reasonable and lawful limits in the course of police investigation — »
«This is an investigation.»
«Of what, sir? Before you may require my cooperation, you must identify yourself, satisfy me as to your bona-fides, state your purpose, and — if I so require — cite the code and show that “reasonable necessity” exists. You have done none of these. I wish to speak to Mr. Berquist.»
The man's jaw muscles were jumping but he answered, «I am Captain Heinrich of the Federation S.S. Bureau. The fact that you reached me by calling the Executive Palace should be proof that I am who I say I am. However — » He took out a wallet, flipped it open, and held it to his pickup. Harshaw glanced at the I.D.
«Very well, Captain,» he growled. «Will you now explain why you are keeping me from speaking with Mr. Berquist?»
«Mr. Berquist is not available.»
«Then why didn't you say so? Transfer my call to someone of Berquist's rank. I mean one of the people who work directly with the Secretary General, as Gil does. I don't propose to be fobbed off on some junior assistant flunky with no authority to blow his own nose! If Gil isn't there, then for God's sake get me someone of equal rank!»
«You have been trying to telephone the Secretary General.»
«Precisely.»
«Very well, you may explain what business you have with the Secretary General.»
«And I may not. Are you a confidential assistant to the Secretary General? Are you privy to his secrets?»
«That's beside the point.»
«That's exactly the point. As a police officer, you know better. I shall explain, to some person known to me to be cleared for sensitive material and in Mr. Douglas's confidence, just enough to make sure that the Secretary General speaks to me. Are you sure Mr. Berquist can't be reached?»
«Quite sure.»
«Then it will have to be someone else — of his rank.»
«If it's that secret, you shouldn't be calling over a phone.»
«My good Captain! Since you had this call traced, you know that my phone is equipped to receive a maximum-security return call.»
The S.S. officer ignored this. Instead he answered, «Doctor, I'll be blunt. Until you explain your business,
