punctures—it would get me to the farm if I had to push it by sheer force of will. I swung on to the road and began to pedal my way out of town and on to the road leading to Carmarthen.
The dawn was streaking the sky with light, trees were turning from lavender and grey into green by the time I reached the farm. I’d done a lot of thinking on the way down and had worked out some sort of plan in my head, a plan to get Michael out of the country, perhaps to France or neutral Ireland. Aunt Jessie was in bed but wide awake, worrying.
‘There’s a message from him.’ She handed the crumpled pencilled note to me and my heart was beating fast as I read it. He wanted me to meet him at the barn, the barn we’d slept in like lovers. I felt warm. He knew I would come to his aid, he trusted me, relied on me, not Hari.
‘He wants food and money, all the money we can get together,’ I said. Jessie nodded. ‘You have one of those perm things here?’
Jessie frowned, ‘yes, but…’
‘Cut my hair and perm it, Jessie. I’ll wear lipstick, no one will recognize me.’
‘Who’s to recognize you anyway? I don’t understand.’
‘Those men who came to the house, they saw me as a kid with plaits, they might be outside, watching. Come on, Jessie, the sooner we start the sooner I’ll be ready.’
Some time later, I made my way from the farmhouse and mounted the bike. My backside was raw from the cut of the saddle but nothing would stop me getting to Michael. I could feel that my funny short curls were still damp, my hair had lightened by some chemical reaction to the perm and, with a coating of lipstick and the stolen clothes of a land girl, I knew I looked entirely different to the girl who had left Swansea hours ago.
Over my shoulder was a bag, in it a canteen of tea and some bread and ham; wrapped around my waist, snug and secure was a purse of money, all I and Jessie could find in the house.
There was a soldier guarding the gateway to the road and he waved me down. I stopped cycling and put my booted foot on the dew-wet ground. ‘Lo there, soldier.’ I did my best to imitate the London accent of one of the land girls and smiled up at the uniformed man. He blinked.
‘Any identification, miss?’
I rooted around in my pockets and shook my head. ‘But then I don’t need anything to identify me to the stupid cows. They don’t bleedin’ care who I am so long as I ease their poor udders. I got a dog tag round my neck if that’s any good?’
After a moment the soldier shook his head. ‘I’d be eager to fish for them but I’m a happily married man. Go on then, milk them beasts, rather you than me, lady.’
As I rode away, I was jubilant. The soldier would have been given a description of me, perhaps even a photograph to look at, and he hadn’t recognized me. My disguise had worked. That was one hurdle over.
Michael was nowhere in sight. I took a deep breath and stood waiting in the silent dawn light of the barn knowing he would come. A few minutes later, a plank of wood moved at the back of the building. He was there and I ran to him and threw myself into his arms.
‘I knew you wouldn’t let me down,’ he said thickly. I sat with him on the straw-covered floor and Michael stared at me. ‘God, you look different!’
‘That’s the whole point.’ I gave him the food and the tea and watched him eat hungrily.
He winked at me. ‘The look has improved you no end.’
I hit him across the arm. ‘Don’t be facetious—you could have been captured, shot even. You were reported, obviously.’
‘Mrs Dixon?’ he said.
‘Or Georgie Porgy,’ I said dryly.
‘Look outside.’ He brushed crumbs from his mouth and I longed to kiss that very same sensitive mouth. I went to the barn door and strode outside, I was a land girl wasn’t I? I looked well on the land.
‘All clear,’ I said, not even a cow or a sheep in sight.’
‘I’d better go then.’ He wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on my head.
I stayed for a moment in his embrace then shifted myself. I shrugged out of the overalls and an old skirt of Jessie’s came tumbling out. I straightened it and stuffed the haversack up inside the skirt and tied it around my waist. Then I hid the remains of the meal and lastly I took the ring Jessie had given me and pushed it on my finger.
‘What on earth do you think you’re doing?’ Michael said.
‘Don’t look so gormless. Jessie and I made a plan. I’m your pregnant wife—at least as far as the coast—that way you won’t stand out like a sore thumb.’
‘But…’ Michael waved his arms.
‘But nothing,’ I said fiercely, ‘I’m coming with you and that’s all there is to it.’ He stared at me dumbly and then shrugged in resignation and we left the barn together.
Twenty-Nine
Hari was still in tears the next morning. She was all sorts of a fool for asking Michael to tea, showing off really to Meryl by bringing him to Swansea yet again. Her father held her while she cried and then begged her to tell him what was wrong. ‘Is it Meryl?’ His voice was anxious. ‘She vanished so suddenly after those men came to the house.’
Hari shook her head. ‘No, well… yes.’
‘Where is she now?’ His voice was fearful and Hari knew he was anxious about his youngest daughter; she was afraid for Meryl too.
‘She’s gone, she’s probably in Carmarthen now or captured by the military police.’ Hari felt the tears well up again. ‘It’s my fault, I wanted Michael to come to Swansea. Meryl warned me of the danger but selfishly, I just wanted to see him.’
‘Don’t blame yourself, Angharad—’ her father put his arm around her shoulder—‘you and the boy are in love, it’s only natural you wanted to be together.’
Hari hadn’t credited her father with so much understanding and, impulsively, she hugged him. ‘But about Meryl,’ she began. He shook his head.
‘We mustn’t worry about her,’ he said, ‘our Meryl has a core of steel, she can look after herself.’ And yet his voice shook even as he spoke.
Hari was working nights and before she left the house she made her father corned-beef hash and opened a tin of peas to go with it. She had some dripping in the pan from last week’s pathetically small roast and she used it to mix with flour and potato water to make the gravy. She ate very little and hoped her father wouldn’t notice. Of course, he did.
‘Starving yourself will do no one any good.’ His voice was stern. ‘Come on, girl, eat up. Have some bread to dip in the gravy, it really is very tasty.’
Hari longed to be alone so that she could worry in peace about Michael. Where was he? Had he been caught? She longed to drive down to the farm but knew it would be foolish to take the risk as she might be followed.
It was with relief that she kissed her father’s cheek and climbed into her car and drove away. Although she loved her father dearly, she was becoming tired of sharing her life with him. She was used to being alone, dealing with her problems on her own.
All night, Hari took messages, insignificant messages, and then, when she was almost asleep, the news came through that Italy had surrendered and for a moment hope filled her heart—was the war almost over? Listening hard, Hari heard that Germany had taken over where the Italians had left off and once again her heart was plunged into fear and despair. Would the war, the danger, never end?
Thirty
