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Today your task is to explore how you respond to people around you. Think about how much you learn from the words and actions of others, good and bad. Are you paying attention to what is going on outside of yourself? Do you soak up outside influences, or do you prefer to cast your influence on others?
It’s important to strike a good balance between what you take in and what you give off. Think of yourself as a light bulb. You give off light and heat, but you also need to bring in energy (or inspiration) in order to shine. You do not want to be imprudent about who you imitate. Not everyone is living the kind of life you want to emulate. You also do not need to impose your own criteria for successful living on others. They might have different priorities that don’t necessarily match your own.
Dr. Joyce Brothers brings up an excellent point in the quote above. Listening may be the sincerest form of flattery. If you truly want to give someone respect, listen to them. You can make your own choices later, but it is almost never a bad idea to hear someone out. You may find you disagree with their views. You don’t have to imitate them.
Listen to the people you come in contact with today. Respect their views. Learn from them. It does not mean you have to agree or follow their lead. Practice collecting information and reserve judgment for a later time. “That’s interesting,” is a great phrase to incorporate into your conversation. It does not mean you concur, but it does mean that you heard the other person’s view. Open your ears and close your mouth today.
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Far too many individuals believe that they must stomp on the heads of their competition in order to achieve success. That is a completely false assumption. People who are truly successful and comfortable in their talents do not belittle others. They lift them up.
There is not a single first-place trophy that will be bestowed upon one individual at the end of this race. The potential number of people who will achieve success in the world is limitless. Every single one of us can finish first. It is critically important to realize that you do not have to push someone else down in order to pull yourself up the ladder.
You are not truly successful if your accomplishments are made to the detriment of someone else. Do you struggle with that concept? Does your competitive side long to beat out the competition? Address your beliefs starting today. Divide a page in your journal into two columns. In the left column, write down the instances when you belittled others. Did you point out a coworker’s mistake without providing a useful alternative? Did you make fun of someone behind their back? Write down every time you remember raising yourself up by putting someone else down. In the right column, put down the times when you lifted someone up. When did you help a friend or encourage a family member? Did you teach anyone a new skill or congratulate them on a job well done? Now, your ongoing task is to increase the right column and decrease the left column.
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Cameron thought he had it all figured out. He had a very specific plan to climb the corporate ladder, and he took every opportunity to further his career. Cameron stuck his head in the office of his CEO at quarter to eight and congratulated him profusely on winning a new contract. That accomplished two things in Cameron’s mind. It showed the CEO he had arrived at work fifteen minutes early, and it also laid on a thick coat of flattery that Cameron hoped would benefit him later. At a lunch meeting, Cameron did everything he could to shoot down a new proposal one of his peers presented. He scoffed and raised numerous questions so that the man was unable to complete a sentence and thoroughly explain his ideas. That accomplished another important task in Cameron’s mind—picking off the competition. It was a good day . . . in Cameron’s mind.
Was Cameron fooling anybody? Probably not. Flattery and insults are empty of substance. Successful people realize they are useless information and give them very little weight. What did Cameron really want? He wanted to
