'Not bad enough to let him beat you,' Patrick said.
'No,' I said. 'Not that bad.'
Chapter 44
My uncle Cash put out a pan of ice water and told me to soak my hands.
'Otherwise they'll swell up,' he said.
My father sat opposite me at the kitchen table.
'Keep your hands in there, long as you can,' he said. 'Then take 'em out, let 'em rest and put 'em back in. Goal is twenty minutes or so.'
I nodded.
'Jeannie came and got you,' I said.
'Yep.'
'What did she say?'
'Told us there was a bunch of kids gonna hurt you,' my father said. 'I asked her how many. She said twenty.'
'Twelve,' I said.
'You counted,' my father said.
'Yes.'
My father nodded once like that was a good thing to have done. I took my hands out of the ice water. They were numb with cold.
'Put your hands back in as soon as you can,' my father said.
'Jeannie's a good kid,' I said.
'She is,' my father said.
'She wants me to be her boyfriend,' I said.
My father nodded.
'You want that?'
'No,' I said. 'I don't. I like her, but I don't like her that way.'
'Can't love somebody just because they want you to,' my father said.
'Dad,' I said. 'I'm only fifteen.'
'I loved your mother,' my father said. 'When I was fifteen. Probably loved her when I was five.'
I nodded.
'I feel bad for her, though,' I said.
'That's not enough,' Cash said.
'Don't do her any favors,' Patrick said. 'You let her think you love her, and in a while she'll know you don't, and you won't be enough.'
'So I'd be hurting her by trying not to hurt her,' I said.
