34
Jason met Dawn at the bus stop every morning and walked her to her locker and first class. They ate lunch together with other members of the CCC youth group, then met every afternoon, after their last class. Filling their backpacks with textbooks and homework assignments, they’d head for the parking lot and drive to the library. They’d find a small, empty table and sit opposite one another. When she had trouble with math assignments, Jason moved his chair beside hers, leaning close and whispering help. The brush of his shoulder against hers and warmth of his body made her blood race. She savored the exquisite torture of being so close to him. When he looked at her, she studied the gold flecks in his eyes, the black depths of his widening pupils.
Dawn was disappointed, but not surprised, when Jason said they couldn’t study at the library anymore. “I’m not getting my work done, and I’ve got to keep my grades up.”
They hung out at school every day, and he called her every night on his work breaks. Sometimes he called when he got home, but his mother never allowed him to talk long. Dawn could hear her. “You need your sleep, Jason.” “You have to get up at four thirty tomorrow morning to finish that report.” “You’ll see her in school. Get off the phone!”
Sometimes he called her back. “Mom’s asleep. We can talk now.” And they did, for two hours sometimes.
Pastor Daniel came by. Jason fumed over the telephone. “Mom must have called him. He said rebellion against God leads to a ruined life.”
“You haven’t rebelled against God.”
“I told him that, but he’s right, too. I’m not exactly where I was a year ago. I can’t go to youth group because of work, and I’m not reading my Bible every day like I was. I’m not praying like I did either. Other than getting my homework done, all I think about is you.”
“Maybe we both have a problem.” Dawn rolled over and tucked her arm beneath her pillow. “We’ll bring our Bibles to school and find a nice quiet place where we can be alone and study. Do you think that will help?”
He gave a hoarse laugh. “When I’m with you, the last thing on my mind is studying.”
The sound of his voice stroked her senses, and she knew hers did the same to him. Stirring him up stirred her as well. She liked the rush of blood in her veins, the warmth in her belly. “I wish you were here, Jason.”
“Imagine I am.”
“Dawn?”
Dawn jumped a foot off the bed. “Christopher!” She hissed in annoyance. “You scared me!”
Her little brother stood in the doorway in his pajamas. “I had a bad dream.”
She wanted to tell him to go back to bed, to leave her alone, but he looked so distressed, she stretched out her arm. “Speaking of dreams, I think my little brother just had a bad one.” She made room for him. “He likes to curl up in bed with me when that happens.” Christopher climbed in and snuggled close.
“Lucky Christopher.” He wished her a good night and hung up. She tucked the telephone back in its cradle on her bedside table.
“You love Jason, don’t you?” Christopher pressed tight against her.
“More than anyone.”
“More than Granny and Papa? More than Mom and Dad and me?”
“It’s a different kind of love, Chris. It doesn’t take love away from anyone else.” She pushed down the palm tree of hair tickling her nose and kissed his head. “Now, go to sleep.”
On Thanksgiving Day, Granny and Papa arrived for the annual gathering. Mom and Granny acted like polite strangers. No one mentioned Oma. Before the table had even been set, Granny said she wanted to have the family come out to Jenner by the Sea for Christmas. Mom said she’d think about it. Granny said she had all the rooms ready and decorated. Mom and Mitch could have the downstairs apartment with Christopher in the small sitting room.
“I’ll put a nice little tree downstairs with ornaments and lights.” Dawn would have the blue bedroom upstairs, of course, just as she always did. Mom kept laying out silverware, not saying anything.
“Well, Carolyn?”
“I said I’d think about it.”
“I know what that means.” Granny stood by the table, fiddling with the silverware Mom had carefully laid out. “Why don’t you ask Dawn what she wants to do?”
Dawn hated to be pulled into the middle of the argument. When Mom glanced at her, she winced. She didn’t want to tell her grandmother she’d rather stay home. She knew Jason would be working extra hours over Christmas break, but she still wanted to be at home in case he had time to see her.
“It’s not up to Dawn.” Mom laid out the last set of silverware and left the dining room. Dawn heard her telephone. She’d turned the volume up on the ring so she wouldn’t miss it. Excusing herself quickly, she ran down the hall, swinging her door shut before she grabbed the phone.
“Hello.”
“You sound like you’ve been running,” Jason said.
“It’s crazy around here. Granny and Mom are circling one another with me right in the middle.”
“We’re going over to the Archers’ for dinner.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because he talked to me last night after the meeting.” Pastor Daniel had done a lot of talking about relationships over the last few youth group meetings. He said if anyone thought they were standing strong, they’d better be careful not to fall. Sometimes he’d look right at her when he talked. Last night, Pastor Daniel called her aside after the kids dispersed. Sharon cast a worried glance and said she’d wait in the car.
Pastor Daniel got right to the point. “Georgia tells me you and Jason are seeing a lot of each other.”
Dawn felt her cheeks heating up. She had met Jason’s mother only once. She’d sensed Georgia Steward didn’t like her very much. “We see each other at school. That’s about it.” Pastor Daniel didn’t say anything, but Dawn could tell he was waiting for more of a confession than that. “And we talk on the telephone.” Clearly, he already knew that.
“My intention wasn’t to upset you, Dawn.”
“I’m not upset.” What did he want her to say? “We haven’t done anything wrong.”
“I didn’t say you had. You’re members of our youth group, and I care about you both. I’ll see you next week?”
She forced a smile. “Sure.” She watched him walk away. His words had seemed bland enough, but she felt a stab of guilt. Hadn’t he read last week that Jesus said thinking about sinning was tantamount to committing the sin? Well, then she sinned all the time! Not a day passed that she didn’t wonder what it would be like to make love with Jason.
“What’d Pastor Daniel say?”
“He said he heard we were seeing each other. I got the impression he thinks I’m some kind of Delilah tempting Samson.”
Jason didn’t laugh. “Mom must have talked to him. She told me the other day she thinks I’m losing my focus.”
“And that’s my fault?”
“She didn’t say that. She just reminded me that I have to keep my focus on where I want to be in five years. We’ve had this same conversation a hundred times before you and I started hanging out.”
She could hear Jason’s mother speaking in the background. “You need to get off the phone, Jason. We have to go. You can talk to her at school…”
“I’ve got to go, Dawn. Can I call you tomorrow?”
“I don’t know.” Her voice choked up. “
