?Are you going to give up work if you keep it?? The only reason I can ever think of for having a baby is all the time off work you get. Actually it?s quite a compelling one. Although you?d also need a nanny, wouldn?t you, otherwise you?d spend all your free time having to look after a baby instead of doing nice things. But if Candy doesn?t get married, who?s going to pay for the nanny?
?Work?? says Candy thoughtfully, as if it?s something she hasn?t even considered. ?Oh, I?m sure I won?t have to work.?
I look at her uncertainly.
?I mean even if . . . well, even if we didn?t get married, which I?m sure we will, I?m sure Daddy would increase my allowance if I needed it,? she continues.
?Really?? I?d forgotten about Candy?s allowance.
?God yes. He?d hate it, of course. But he?d definitely make sure we had enough money. . . .?
I smile sweetly. It?s so unfair. Why can?t I have a nice trust fund or something? I feel the beginnings of Candy- envy creeping up through my body. I used to get this all the time?being friends with Candy is not good for anyone?s health. But I realize that I now have a really good way of dealing with it. I just picture Candy with stretch marks and a large stomach and I start to feel much better. It?s like the old technique for giving presentations: imagine everyone with just their underwear on. Except this image is actually going to happen.
?What about the father? Is it one of your investment banker admirers? Is it someone I?ve met? And are you going to have a huge big wedding? Oh, Candy, tell me,? I beg, but she shakes her head.
Instead, I slurp my coffee while Candy tells me about a house she?s seen in Kensington (a flat is just not suitable to have a baby in) and about schools in the area, great clothes shops for pregnant women and the possibility of having a quick tummy tuck after the birth?naturally I advise against it.
I keep looking for an opportune moment to tell Candy about my stuff, but somehow the fact that after all this time Mike seems to really fancy me doesn?t really warrant much airspace when Candy?s about to become a mother.
I look at my watch. We?ve been sitting in the coffee shop for nearly an hour now and I know more about pregnancy than I ever thought possible. Certainly more than I want to know. Surely it must be okay to talk about Mike for a bit now. Actually, Candy would probably really appreciate me changing the subject and talking about something other than babies. But how can I gradually introduce Mike into the conversation?
?So, anyway,? I venture, ?it looks like Mike is up to his old tricks again!? Hmmm, not really what I was looking for, but it?ll have to do.
Candy looks at me strangely. ?Meaning what, exactly??
?Well, I think he might want me back,? I say gleefully, delighted to finally get an opportunity to tell my story. ?I mean, he?s been calling and e-mailing, and then we went out for a drink last night and he was all over me! Nothing happened, of course?I?m, you know, with David now, but it?s a funny old world isn?t it!?
It?s all come out wrong. I wanted her to tease the facts out of me, and only suggest that Mike has been flirting with me. But at least I?ve opened up the subject for discussion. I look up at Candy expectantly, waiting for her to tell me to stay away from Mike so I can explain that this time it?s him doing all the chasing and that actually I?m notreally interested, but instead she just says ?You went out last night??
I suddenly remember that Candy may be cross on behalf of David. She did introduce us, after all. And the last thing I want is for her to say anything to him. God, why didn?t I think of that before?
?Well, it was more of a chance meeting really,? I say uncertainly, backtracking furiously. ?We just had a quick drink. You know, for old time?s sake.?
Candy looks at me accusingly. ?There?s nothing in it,? I say quickly. ?I think Mike?s just made a real success of things and is realizing too late that it?s no fun if you haven?t got anyone to share it with.?
It feels good to be saying this. I have wanted to be able to say this ever since Mike walked out on me. I?m not entirely sure it?s true, but it?s near enough.
Candy does not look pleased. ?Georgie, I thought you were going out with David? Or have I missed something here? For God?s sake, you go for one drink and now you think he wants you back? When are you going to grow up and realize that Mike is just not interested in you and never was??
It?s obviously bad timing. I shouldn?t have brought up my men issues. Candy is pregnant, and that?s far more important than my stupid ruminations on whether or not my flirting with Mike is completely wicked or just a bit of innocent fun.
But doesn?t she realize that Mikeis interested in me? That things have changed? I?m going to have to leave the subject, but I wish she?d been there. You know, to see that he was all over me. That I wasn?t just imagining it.
?I?m sorry, Candy, I didn?t mean it, really. Of course I?m going out with David, and I?m completely over Mike?you know that. It?s not my fault if he calls, though, is it??
I give her a smile, but am disconcerted to see that there are tears in her eyes. God, what have I done?
?Candy, honestly, forget it, it?s nothing,? I say hurriedly. ?Look, I?m sorry I even brought it up. You haven?t even told me when the baby?s due or about names or anything! We could go to Mothercare or something!?
But it?s too late. Candy is gathering up her things. ?Candy?? I look at her in alarm. Is she really that upset? Can pregnancy hormones make you that temperamental?
?Look, I?m really sorry, George, I?ve got to go now,? says Candy, sniffing. ?I . . . I?m just a bit emotional, you know. It was nice seeing you, and I?ll give you a call. Okay?? She gets up and starts walking out of the coffee shop very quickly.
?Look after yourself!? I manage to yell after her.
I look around the shop convinced that people are staring at me. This is awful. I haven?t seen Candy for about two years, and within an hour or so I?ve managed to upset her so much that she?s actually walked out on me.
Of course, if I?d really thought about it I?d have seen this coming. Candy always thought Mike was bad news where I was concerned. I mean, the two of them do get on very well?they?ve known each other for years?but she
