Even The Vampires Get The Blues

'That's nice of him. Can you heal this?' I asked Paen.

'Yes. How is your shoulder? Did you hit your head?' He flinched as I tried to dab up the blood, taking my hand in his to stop me. No fussing.

Why? I like fussing over you.

Why do you like doing that? he countered.

I don't know. Because it makes me feel—I stopped before I could say something I wasn't prepared to admit to myself yet, let alone him.

Aha! I knew it! You're falling in love with me, aren't you?

Would I do something like that to you? I asked, innocence brimming out of me.

He gave me a dark look. Gratefully, I let the matter go.

'I'm OK, and yes, I hit my head, but only just a little,' I said, rubbing a knot on the back of my head. 'What did Clare mean about me being immortal? I'm not immortal. I never have been. I just have a longer life span than most people.'

'It'll stretch into centuries now,' Finn said with a slight smile.

'I'm lost. Why on earth would you think I'm immortal?' I asked him.

He raised his chin and sniffed the air. 'Believe me, I know. Welcome to the family.'

'Huh?' He just smiled at me. I turned back to Paen, who was standing with his eyes closed, concentrating fiercely on healing his wounds.

'You're Paen's Beloved,' Finn said. 'Thank you for that, by the way. It's nice to see him with a soul.'

'Yes, it is,' I said, watching as the redness in Paen's face faded slightly, the wound closing itself. The swelling in his eye went down enough for me to see a bright silver glint when he opened his eyes to meet my stare. His new soul shone like a miniature sun within him. 'You want to explain all this to me now?'

'Not really, but I suspect you won't allow me to get away without an explanation.'

'Damn straight,' I said, crossing my arms and leaning my butt against the desk. 'I'm all ears.'

A little zipper of excitement had me quivering for a moment as he glanced at my ears, but I pushed that down as something to indulge in later.

'We were attacked, evidently by your old friend Pilar. You foolishly threw yourself in front of a bolt meant for me. While I was trying to carry you inside, Pilar attacked again. Finn got the crossbow from him, but couldn't stop him from cracking me a few times with a hunk of wood while I was trying to protect you. He left before Finn could disable him. It's noon now, or else Finn would have been able to track him. Everyone is fine. End of story.'

'Oh, not even,' I said, my arms still crossed. Paen's eye was almost down to normal, and although he was still covered with blood, at least the gaping cut on his temple had closed up and stopped bleeding. 'I have lots of questions, like why Pilar would switch from attacking Clare to you? That question aside—'

'You are absolutely certain it was Pilar? Finn had never seen him before today, and I didn't get a good look before he attacked me,' Paen asked, interrupting me.

'Yes, I'm sure it was him, although I didn't get a good look at him since I was too busy trying to shove you out of the way. Back to major confusion—your brother says I'm your Beloved, but we tried those seven steps, and you didn't get your soul back. What changed?'

'You sacrificed yourself for him,' Finn said, stealing a kiss from Clare, who was bustling around gathering up bloody cloths. 'It's necessary for a Beloved to be willing to sacrifice everything in order to redeem her Dark One's soul.'

I narrowed my eyes at Paen. 'You left that out of the list of steps.'

He shrugged. 'I didn't think it was pertinent.'

'You didn't think—' My tiny little hairs on the back of my neck hackled up.

He held up a hand to stop the coming diatribe. 'I meant that I did not think it was pertinent in the steps to Joining. My father said he hadn't been Joined until Mum offered herself up in his place, but I didn't connect that with us.'

'So I was right after all,' I said, feeling a warm glow of happiness at the thought of Paen having his soul back.

'Yes, you were right.' He avoided looking at me, as if he wanted to hide something.

'Well, don't thank her or anything, brother,' Finn said, rolling his eyes. 'Talk about ingratitude.'

'It's all right, he doesn't have to thank me.' I examined his face, looking for some other sign that we were now bound together. There was nothing, no miraculous… something. I had no idea what I was expecting to see, but I felt a strange sense of loss that the indescribable something wasn't there. 'I told him I would be happy to help him regain his soul.'

'Yes, but—'

'Leave it, Finn,' Paen said, shooting a look full of unspoken comment at his brother. 'If you're feeling better, Sam, perhaps we can move ahead with our previous plans?'

The sense of something missing heightened. 'Sure. Um. Just a second… I'm sorry, I guess I'm a bit more addled than I thought. We're Joined now, right?'

'Yes,' Paen said curtly, using one of the damp cloths that Clare left to wipe the blood off his face.

'So I'm… what? I'm a vampire?'

'No, you're a Beloved,' Finn answered, smiling when Paen scowled at him. 'Someone has to tell her, Paen, and it's clear you're falling down on the job.'

'I'm just trying to get a handle on this,' I said with a faint apology. 'I'm not a vampire, but I'm… what exactly? Still me or different?'

'You're no different than you were with the exception of being immortal,' Paen said, tossing the now soiled cloth in the trash.

'Paen, that's not really fair… right. None of my business. You two work it out yourselves,' Finn said, holding up his hands when Paen shot him yet another potent glance. 'I'll just say this, Sam—there are three sorts of Moravians: Dark Ones, who have no souls until redeemed, Moravian men like me who were born with a soul, and females, who all have souls. Beloveds are more or less the same as female Moravians.'

'Ah. Do the women…' I picked up a staple remover and made biting gestures toward my neck.

'Drink blood? They can, but they don't need to in order to live like we need to.'

'That sounds rather unfair,' Clare said, patting Finn on the arm as she made pouty lips. 'All that biting you have to do that they don't.'

He grinned at her. 'Ah, but you like it when I bite you.'

'So the females and down the line Moravians have souls, but the Dark Ones don't? Why are the males and females so different?' I asked.

'Ask him,' Finn said, nodding toward Paen. 'He's been researching the history of our people for decades.'

'It has to do with the manner in which the first Dark One was created,' Paen said. 'No one knows for certain just how he ended up damned, but I hope to uncover the details soon.'

'Ah. Sounds fascinating. But about this immortality thing—that's like payment for giving you back your soul?' I asked.

'Of a sort, yes. Any other questions?'

One. Why aren't you happier about getting your soul back?

I told you before—I don't need a Beloved. This changes nothing between us, Sam.

Oh, I thought it did, but this was clearly not the best moment to have a discussion about the new definitions of our relationship, so I let his comment slide and went over to my own desk, pulling out my phone book. 'I'll call Mr. Race and see if he has time to talk with us.'

'Thank you.'

'Mr. Race? Our client?' Clare asked as she reclaimed her desk. Finn spun her client chair around so it was backward and sat next to her, allowing her to murmur soft little things to him every now and again.

Paen explained what he had been told while I worked my way through the hotel hierarchy of voice mail to leave Owen Race a message. I was just finishing when he picked up the phone, somewhat breathless. 'Hello? Miss Cosse? Sorry, I was just coming into the room when I heard you leaving a message. Have you found it?'