campaigning for better behaviour.
ALBERTO
The unsalubrious landlord of the Red Parrot Hotel, Bogota.
AMBROSE
Principal guest conductor, RSO, known as the ‘fat controller’ — a bitchy old queen.
ANATOLE
A tempestuously talented Russian contestant in the Appleton Piano Competition.
SISTER ANGELICA
A beautiful nun.
ASTRID
Boris Levitsky’s stunning Scandinavian au pair.
LADY BADDINGHAM
Much admired ex-wife of Tony Baddingham, the fiendish ex-chairman of Corinium Television.
BENNY BASANOVICH
A very tiresome Russian-French pianist who can only play fortissimo.
BARRY THE BASS
Principal Bass, RSO.
MRS BATESON
A music lover who befriends Marcus Campbell-Black.
JAMES BENSON
A very expensive private doctor.
BIANCA
An adorable Colombian orphan.
MRS BODKIN
Rupert Campbell-Black’s ancient housekeeper.
ROSALIE BRANDON
A bossyboots attached to the London office of Shepherd Denston, the music agents.
MILES BRIAN-KNOWLES
Detested deputy-managing director of the RSO, a snake in furry caterpillar’s clothing, who is after Mark Carling’s job.
DAVIE BUCKLE
A beaming bruiser and RSO timpanist.
EDDIE CAMPBELL-BLACK
Rupert’s father, an unreformed rake, just emerged from a fifth marriage and raring to go.
RUPERT CAMPBELL-BLACK
Ex-world show-jumping champion, now one of the world’s leading owner-trainers. Still Mecca for most women.
TAGGIE CAMPBELL-BLACK
Rupert’s wife — an angel and the apple of his once roving eye.
MARCUS CAMPBELL-BLACK
Rupert’s son by his first marriage. A pianist whose path to the top is only impeded by asthma and nerves, both chiefly induced by his father.
TABITHA CAMPBELL-BLACK
A ravishing tearaway. Rupert’s daughter, also by his first wife.
CANDY
A comely rank-and-file RSO viola player.
LINDY CARDEW
The mettlesome wife of Rutminster’s planning officer.
MARK CARLING
Beleaguered managing director of the RSO.
HAN CHAI
A very young Korean contestant in the Appleton Piano Competition.
TONY CHARLTON
The indefatigable and perennially cheerful stage manager of the RSO. Known as ‘Charlton Handsome’.
MISS CHATTERTON
Marcus Campbell-Black’s piano teacher, known as ‘Chatterbox’.
LADY CHISLEDON
A lusty old trout and member of the RSO board.
CHRISSIE
An obsequious Northern Television minion.
CLARE
Another very pretty RSO rank-and-file viola player, also the orchestra Sloane.
CLARISSA
Principal Cello, RSO.
CLIVE
Rannaldini’s sinister black-leather-clad henchman.
THE BISHOP OF COTCHESTER
