Austentatious

Sipping the warm chocolate, I walked cautiously back down the hall to my room, my heart pounding out a drumbeat as I considered the fraught-with-crazy potential of an overnight, personalized reply from my very own life coach.

I suspect you know it’s mushroomed beyond magical

Et tu, Fairy Jane? It was simply too much to process this early in the morning.

I slid the snarky little book back onto the shelf, to the left of Sense and Sensibility, on what I imagined to be the “Sense” side. I was keeping it far, far away from Persuasion—it certainly didn’t need any help in that quarter; it was becoming quite adept at influencing me all on its own. So basically I’d turned into a superstitious kook, although still sufficiently detached to manage an eye roll for my own crazy antics. That was something, I supposed. Naturally I slipped the key into the cupcake tin in the cupboard beside the stove and pretended everything was normal.

On my way out the door, my eye caught on yesterday’s valentine-red daisies now livening up the kitchen table, and a smile curved my lips. On impulse, I snatched a single bloom from the grouping and snipped a few inches off the stem before tucking it jauntily in the top buttonhole of my cropped navy blazer. Who said I couldn’t be spontaneous?

13 I suspect you know it’s mushroomed beyond magical

I got an unexpected number of compliments on my flower, but that didn’t stop me from ditching it behind my computer just before Brett stopped by my cube for lunch. The last thing I wanted was to overshadow our lunch with shades of Sean MacInnes. My intention was not to think about him at all, to tune my romantic antennae on Brett and see how things played out with the Epitome of Sensible Romance. No pressure.

While lunch wasn’t quite tinged with the whole first-date vibe, my heart rate was speeding slightly as I followed Brett downstairs, out through the lobby, and across the parking lot to his car. His silver Audi was sleek and spotless, and Brett oozed competence as he slid into the driver’s seat across from me. It was slightly awkward to hold my feet in the air while he repositioned my floor mat for maximum coverage, but really, fastidiousness was just fine with me.

“So ... ?” I finally started, lunging into the silence. “Where should we go?”

After cautiously (and silently) backing out of his parking spot, Brett turned to me with a grin. “Pizza Garden.” Not so much a suggestion as a done deal. Luckily it was one of my favorite lunch spots.

“Sounds good,” I said.

“They have a great lunch deal,” he said, easing into a left turn, more serious than I would have thought necessary.

“They do,” I agreed.

Awkward silence, Take One. Luckily the restaurant was only minutes away.

Quickly seating us at a scarred wooden table near the window, our waitress recited the day’s pizza specials (today’s were Greek, Texas Fajita, and Basilica) and left with our drink orders, promising to return momentarily to take our orders.

“What are you getting?” I asked, flashing a smile.

“Texas Fajita.”

“Never tried it. I’m getting the Garden pizza.”

My smile faltered just slightly in the face of Brett’s disbelieving stare.

“But it’s not one of the specials.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s more expensive, but it’s a little bigger too. Six inches instead of four. I take the leftovers home.”

“But even if you factor in the additional size of the pizza,” Brett protested, “it’s not nearly as good a deal. And you don’t get a salad.”

“You’re right.” Maybe he just needed to know I’d done the math. “But it’s my favorite, and it’s loaded with vegetables, so I’m happy to splurge.” I could have jumped into a cost breakdown / nutritional analysis, but I didn’t think anyone wanted that.

“Okay,” he said, with a baffled, slightly concerned little shake of his head.

“Don’t worry, I can afford it,” I teased, linking my fingers, laying my palms flat on the table, and forcing myself to keep smiling.

Awkward Silence, Take Two.

The remainder of our lunch date was actually quite pleasant (if we didn’t count Brett’s quickly masked disapproving glance as my Garden pizza was slid onto the table in front of me). As expected, we had a lot in common, both past history and future goals, and I felt the tight coil of uncertainty in my chest begin to unfurl. This was what I’d expected, how I’d imagined my romantic life would be. Two compatible people blazing a sensible trail through life. My grin just kept on giving.

Right up until the check came.

We both reached for it, but Brett snatched it cleanly away.

Biting my lower lip, feeling a little thrill zip through me, it was on the tip of my tongue to thank him for lunch.

Thank God I controlled the urge, because two seconds later, he slid the bill back in my direction.

“Since I got the special, it’s not going to be an even fifty-fifty split.” Pulling out his wallet, Brett went for one final gloat. “I tried to tell you... .”

“You did,” I snapped, pulling the bill toward me and retrieving my own wallet. I yanked out several bills, including a generous tip, and placed them on the table, really hoping the topic was now officially closed.

He didn’t say a word as I packed up the remains of my pizza in the cardboard to-go box, his jaw busy crunching every last bit of ice in the jumbo-sized glass he’d drained of iced tea. What could I say, the man liked to get his money’s worth.

Awkward Silence, Take Three.

But no butterflies, no queasiness, and no surprises. There was something to be said for quiet companionship. But it definitely wasn’t “Wowza!”

Trapped on the test floor an hour later, my daisy defiantly back in place, I was bored senseless and figured it was as good a time as any to get the lowdown on Gabe’s burgeoning romance with my impressionable young mentee. Fishing my phone from the crowded pocket of my smock, I texted an opener.

NJames: Any luck convincing Beck to show you her tattoo?

Exactly seven parts ran through the full test suite at minus forty degrees before Gabe responded.

GVogler: i’m building up to it. what’s up?

NJames: I went out last night.

GVogler: WHAT??? NOT with the dude from the band?

NJames: Beck didn’t tell you?

This was my sly attempt at deducing just how chummy they’d gotten in the last two days.

GVogler: i see her tonight. spill!

Interesting ...

NJames: Yes, him. Where?