The Darkest Secret

her veins. Spiderwebs winked through her vision, and dizziness bombarded her.

The darkness that had been a part of her for centuries cried out in welcome as the demon High Lord slipped into her little by little. No longer did she have to tug. The demon wanted inside her now, was even aiding her, desperate to crawl in, to be whole again.

Almost over, she thought, hurting so badly tears were streaking down her cheeks.

Suddenly there was a pain of another kind tearing through her neck, her back — Amun started shouting again, perhaps crying, but she hardly noticed. Her insides were too busy burning to ash.

And then she was being pulled away from the former keeper of Hate. She didn’t protest; she had the demon now. All of the demon, and it was zipping through her mind, banging into her skull, filling her up, consuming her.

Haidee, sweetheart. Please. Let me see those beautiful eyes.

Her eyelids fluttered open, and she saw that Amun was looming over her, bathed in red. Blood? But blood had never glowed like that before.

Sweetheart, oh, gods, sweetheart. He’d never looked so tormented.

She opened her mouth to reply, but something warm flowed from her mouth rather than words. Is he dead? She didn’t have the strength to push the words into his mind, but somehow he heard her anyway.

Yes, sweetheart, he’s dead. Tears glistened in his black gaze.

You’re sad? Don’t be sad, baby. We won. She tried to reach up, to brush those tears away, but again, she didn’t have the strength.

Oh, sweetheart. Soft fingers smoothed her brow.

Her heartbeat was slowing, then fluttering, almost nonexistent. Thankfully, though, the cold was returning to her limbs, dousing the fire. Once the ice returned, she thought, she could expel the demon, right? And she and Amun could be together.

Amun had feared she wouldn’t be able to expel the demon, that he would forever be a part of her. If that were the case, she would deal.

He…fought you. He ravaged your throat.

She blinked, not understanding. Sweetheart, you’re…fading.

Fading? The red glow bathing his face was dimming. Did that mean… I’m…dying?

No! I’ll do something. There has to be something. Amun leapt into motion, dragging the backpack next to her. With shaky hands, he reached inside and withdrew bandages and other materials to try and save her. Stay with me, sweetheart. Okay?

She was. She was dying.

She tried to obey him, she really did. Not because she feared the pain that awaited her, but because she wanted to be with this man always. She didn’t want him hurt by images of her death the way she’d been hurt by images of her family. So she fought the cold, the weakness. And while she fought, she realized she could expunge the demon, because a scaled, fanged and clawed creature rose from her skin, its eyes bright red.

Amun watched, horrified. She watched, too, amazed that she hadn’t had to corner him and force him out. Amazed that she didn’t hurt anymore. But when the beast darted out of the cave, roaring hysterically, she found there was nothing left to tether her to her body. Darkness was pulling at her.

Her organs were shutting down, the ice that had saved her now killing her. She knew the feeling well. Had experienced it hundreds of times before. This was the end of her.

I love you, she told Amun.

He never stopped bandaging her wounds. Then stay, damn it. Fight this. Haidee! Do you hear me? Don’t you dare leave me!

I love you, she repeated, and then, because she couldn’t fight any longer, she allowed herself to be pulled the rest of the way into the darkness.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Amun was going crazy. Haidee had died. Died. Her heart had stopped, her ruined body had gone still and her eyes had glazed. She’d had no breath left inside her lungs, even when he’d pumped at her chest for hours, her blood all over his hands. And then she’d disappeared. Simply vanished, as if she’d never existed.

He screamed for hours more — and Secrets screamed along with him.

While Amun had been making love with Haidee that second time, the demon had realized that she would never hurt them, no matter how powerful she was. That she would always strive to make life better for them.

With the realization, affection for her had grown. Not just because she possessed so many secrets, but because of her. Even though she was a demon-slayer, a justice-dealer, she was the demon’s favorite playground.

How could Themis have sentenced such a precious female to die? Where was the justice in such a vile action?

Amun was suddenly happy the goddess was currently rotting in Tartarus with the rest of the Greeks. After everything she’d done, she deserved that and more.

Only, if she hadn’t acted, Amun never would have had this second chance with Haidee. Or even met her at all. She was a gift. His gift. And he’d failed her. In every way that mattered, he’d failed her. Twice she’d died because of him. And she hated to die, feared the pain, the loss of her memories.

My fault, he thought.

The first time had been an accident on his part. This second time, she had rushed headlong into danger to save him. He’d been too focused on slaying their enemy to take note of her plan. Foolish of him. He was the keeper of Secrets, damn it! He should have guessed her intentions, and he should have stopped her.

When she had locked on Hate, Amun hadn’t known what to do or how to separate them. All Secrets had known was that breaking the link between the pair would hurt Haidee far more than letting her finish drawing the demon into herself. But then Hate had begun fighting her, chomping at her, clawing at her, and Amun hadn’t cared about her pain — he’d cared only about saving her life. He’d ripped them apart.

But he was too late.

The wound in Haidee’s neck had been fatal.

Amun paced. If he summoned the angel, Zacharel, he would be escorted home. His demon knew this, sensed it now as if the knowledge had always been there, yet Amun could not force himself to do so. This was the last place he’d seen Haidee, the last place he’d held her, tasted her, and he didn’t want to leave just yet, didn’t want to give up the sweet scent of her that lingered in the air or the chill of her that was wrapped around him like a cloak.

He needed to formulate a plan. Without interference from his friends.

Haidee had told him not to try to find her cave. That, he would ignore. He would find that cave. He would help her through those waves of hate. If she still possessed any hint of the demon inside her, that is. The creature had risen from her, and had seemed intact. Nothing missing.

But even without the demon, she wouldn’t stay dead. She’d said so herself. She would come back to him.

And if she was without even that small piece, she could very well remember him.

Suddenly hope welled within him. First, he had to find her. And he would. She was out there. She had to be out there. If she didn’t remember him and fought him, he would let her go, wouldn’t hurt her, even to save himself. But then what? What if she returned to the Hunters?

He would just have to follow her, guard her from a distance. He’d slipped past her defenses once. He could do so again.