design to those below. I unclose my door, my impatient hand now rests upon the polished handle by which I expect to gain access to happiness, when-confusion to all potteries! — a flower-stand that stood upon the window of the landing-place which divided the apartments, touched by my elbow, fell to the ground with a confounded crash which made the house re-echo to the sound. I made a backward movement in order to regain my bed, there to await the issue of this infernal adventure. Who could have contemplated such a d-d mishap?
As I expected, roused by the clamour, Mr. E., grumbling at the disturbance, unclosed his door. He calls, 'Hulloa! what's all this?' No answer. He ascended the stairs, and perceiving the visible cause of the uproar, in the wreck of the accursed flower-stand, muttered to himself,
'How the deuce could this have happened? It's d-n strange! Couldn't fall of itself, that's very clear.'
At last thinking that it might appear suspicious to feign sleep after such a clatter, I opened the door rubbing my eyes and yawning, as one suddenly awakened, and affected great surprise at seeing him in his shirt, but observed at the same time, 'I cannot imagine what it can be that so suddenly disturbed me. I awoke this moment with a ringing in my ears, as if the very house was falling.'
'Ah,' returned he, 'the same noise alarmed me, and look here!' he added, pointing to the shattered garden pots, 'this is a d-d curious occurrence; I can't account for it, anyhow; not a breath of wind is stirring; and even if it was blowing like the devil, the window being closed, why even that couldn't do it. What think you, mister-can you explain it better?'
Although not yet broad day, being in the middle of summer, there was light enough to enable me to perceive that he was eyeing me with a look of keen suspicion, glancing at my neighbour's door as if to satisfy himself that all was right in that quarter. Whatever his thoughts might have been at first, I flatter myself that they were in a moment dispelled, by the look and tone of unconcern with which I answered,
'Most certainly, nothing more easy, when an entrance is attempted through a window, the seat of which is filled with flower-pots.'
His coward cheeks grew pale as death, as trembling he exclaimed,
'Good God! what! do you think that thieves were attempting-but no, it would be impossible to get into the house this way-see how securely that window is fastened.'
'And yet,' I answered, smilingly, 'the entrance has been effected; and see where the grim-visaged thief even now stands glaring on us,' at the same time pointing to a large black cat, who, luckily for me, had taken its station on the lower stairs; a broken pane in the window corroborated my explanation.
He was satisfied, and bidding me good morning, descended the stairs.
Vexed and irritated, I returned to my own solitary bed, until, by the universal stillness which reigned through the house, I concluded that slumber had again sealed up his eyelids; then, with increased caution, I once more quit my chamber and gain the door of Emma's. I try the lock-it yields! I enter. Three easy paces bring me to the bed! The crimson streaks of opening day afforded light barely sufficient to reveal to my admiring gaze the voluptuous form which sleeping lay before me.
The heat throughout the night had been oppressive and consequently during her slumbers she had thrown off every article of clothing; the counterpane alone remained and this had fallen to below her knees.
The splendid picture formed by this sleeping Venus the reader must imagine; words would be too feeble, even were I to write for a month, to do justice to the exciting scene: therefore I at once abandon the attempt.
Unable calmly to endure the sight, I knelt beside her and pressing my lips to hers with energy lightly touched a rosy nipple. She awoke with a slight scream which might have been attended with danger had not the increasing fervour of my kisses delivered with open mouth and penetrating tongue stifled the rising sound, which was not repeated, having been but the effect of momentary alarm; memory soon returning she clasped me to her naked bosom and having rapturously sucked my delighted pizzle for some minutes cried upon me to birdnest her without a moment's delay, and with clutching hands upon my buttocks drove me to the hilt within her pouting proud-faced vulva.
Not till after our fourth act of coition did my powers begin to shew signs of flagging, when the girl's red mouth and clinging tongue were swiftly applied to their delicious task of resuscitation, and under this enchanting stimulus, the member in question soon regained the necessary length and stiffness and repaid the luscious service of her lips by burying himself in her womb.
For three hours locked in each other's arms, we envied not the gods their famed Elysium!
On the following day, I was greatly astonished at the extraordinary conduct of my charming Bessy, for notwithstanding our late rupture, she could not betray any signs of anger in the presence of Emma without exciting her suspicions; I consequently took advantage of an opportunity which presented itself on seeing the two ladies together of walking in as though no unpleasant squabble had ever taken place, when the look of reproach with which she eyed me left no doubt upon my mind as to her being perfectly aware of the preceding night; and as her reserve grew less upon each succeeding day, I became the more confirmed in this opinion; more particularly as on one occasion, I being rather depressed in spirits, she, with a look of peculiar meaning, continued to sing-as though unconsciously amusing herself, portions of an old ballad, the burthen of which runs thus:
Oh, I could tell you how, love, and when, The very first hour, and the place, While I vowed I'd ne'er heed the oaths of men.
You prevailed, and I mourn my disgrace.
In short, her allusions became so very pointed that one day, being alone with her, I ventured to demand an explanation. Notwithstanding her assumed cheerfulness, a tear involuntarily starting dimmed the lustre of her sparkling eye. She at length informed me, that for a long time my attentions to Emma had excited her suspicion and having heard me enter her apartment so shortly after my last offence she felt persuaded that Emma had found a way to console me for what I might term my own unkindness; she acknowledged also, that the torturing pangs of jealousy had kept her awake throughout the whole of that eventful night; and although I had used the utmost caution in my movements, nothing had escaped the acute fineness of her sense of hearing-nay, such was the particular manner in which she depicted the most minute incidents of my frailty, that, perfectly astounded, it was some moments ere I could gain sufficient assurance to assert my innocence, and even then the protestation was made in such bungling terms that my confusion only added to my conviction and at once proclaimed my guilt.
Clearly detected, I endeavoured to palliate my crime, urging the powerful incentives I had experienced and vowed a thousand times that love for Emma had not induced me to act, but that, maddened by my disappointed hopes and fearing that my offence was beyond forgiveness, I had recourse to drink, till urged on by grief, despair, revenge, intoxication, and convenient temptation I had fallen.
At length my Bessy, like a pitying angel, moved by my tears and visible remorse, awarded pardon to her suffering penitent; at the same time kindly pledged her word that the knowledge she had so artfully obtained should be forever confined to her own breast; before we parted, however, she extorted from me a promise that the guilty commerce should never be repeated, for which she rewarded me with a delightful kiss, and we parted, if possible, better friends than ever.
Not wishing to hurt the feelings of the kind and gentle Emma by an appearance of indifference, I took an opportunity of informing her that I had reason to believe that Mr. E. entertained suspicions that an improper intimacy had taken place between us; and, in order to remove this impression and preserve her reputation, it would be
expedient to affect a distant carriage towards each other; she appreciated my motives, and feigning a slight quarrel we ultimately succeeded in deceiving the penetration of Bessy, to whom I certainly kept my word as sacred-as possible-for my intercourse with her rival was discontinued forever-in her house.
Shortly after this Mr. E., still eagerly intent upon his favourite pursuit of accumulating money, determined upon letting one of his parlours, and his wife-for reasons best known to herself-prevailed on him to request that I would make it my sleeping room, urging as a motive that being on the same floor with themselves it would be much more convenient for her to attend to, as it would save much trouble and she need not then be continually running up and down stairs; that as I was not often at home until late at night they could have the apartment during the day; the upper room which would thus become vacant would immediately be let, and we then should appear to be forming one family, his gains of course increasing in proportion; this latter argument at once decided him, and the same evening he proposed the project in a very roundabout manner and concluded by asking if I had any objection to an exchange.
I at once perceived the cunning motive of my jealous Bessy, which was in fact merely to remove me from the dangerous vicinity of my fair neighbour; but as I foresaw also numberless advantages to myself (which in the one
