count. However, she soon regretted her discreet conduct, for the moment Labordette had gone the baker reappeared, though it was barely half-past two, and with many loud oaths roughly settled himself on a bench in the hall. The young woman listened to him from the first floor. She was pale, and it caused her especial pain to hear the servants' secret rejoicings swelling up louder and louder till they even reached her ears. Down in the kitchen they were dying of laughter. The coachman was staring across from the other side of the court; Francois was crossing the hall without any apparent reason. Then he hurried off to report progress, after sneering knowingly at the baker. They didn't care a damn for Madame; the walls were echoing to their laughter, and she felt that she was deserted on all hands and despised by the servants' hall, the inmates of which were watching her every movement and liberally bespattering her with the filthiest of chaff. Thereupon she abandoned the intention of borrowing the hundred and thirty-three francs from Zoe; she already owed the maid money, and she was too proud to risk a refusal now. Such a burst of feeling stirred her that she went back into her room, loudly remarking:
'Come, come, my girl, don't count on anyone but yourself. Your body's your own property, and it's better to make use of it than to let yourself be insulted.'
And without even summoning Zoe she dressed herself with feverish haste in order to run round to the Tricon's. In hours of great embarrassment this was her last resource. Much sought after and constantly solicited by the old lady, she would refuse or resign herself according to her needs, and on these increasingly frequent occasions when both ends would not meet in her royally conducted establishment, she was sure to find twenty-five louis awaiting her at the other's house. She used to betake herself to the Tricon's with the ease born of use, just as the poor go to the pawnshop.
But as she left her own chamber Nana came suddenly upon Georges standing in the middle of the drawing room. Not noticing his waxen pallor and the somber fire in his wide eyes, she gave a sigh of relief.
'Ah, you've come from your brother.'
'No,' said the lad, growing yet paler.
At this she gave a despairing shrug. What did he want? Why was he barring her way? She was in a hurry--yes, she was. Then returning to where he stood:
'You've no money, have you?'
'No.'
'That's true. How silly of me! Never a stiver; not even their omnibus fares Mamma doesn't wish it! Oh, what a set of men!'
And she escaped. But he held her back; he wanted to speak to her. She was fairly under way and again declared she had no time, but he stopped her with a word.
'Listen, I know you're going to marry my brother.'
Gracious! The thing was too funny! And she let herself down into a chair in order to laugh at her ease.
'Yes,' continued the lad, 'and I don't wish it. It's I you're going to marry. That's why I've come.'
'Eh, what? You too?' she cried. 'Why, it's a family disease, is it? No, never! What a fancy, to be sure! Have I ever asked you to do anything so nasty? Neither one nor t'other of you! No, never!'
The lad's face brightened. Perhaps he had been deceiving himself! He continued:
'Then swear to me that you don't go to bed with my brother.'
'Oh, you're beginning to bore me now!' said Nana, who had risen with renewed impatience. 'It's amusing for a little while, but when I tell you I'm in a hurry--I go to bed with your brother if it pleases me. Are you keeping me-- are you paymaster here that you insist on my making a report? Yes, I go to bed with your brother.'
He had caught hold of her arm and squeezed it hard enough to break it as he stuttered:
'Don't say that! Don't say that!'
With a slight blow she disengaged herself from his grasp.
'He's maltreating me now! Here's a young ruffian for you! My chicken, you'll leave this jolly sharp. I used to keep you about out of niceness. Yes, I did! You may stare! Did you think I was going to be your mamma till I died? I've got better things to do than to bring up brats.'
He listened to her stark with anguish, yet in utter submission. Her every word cut him to the heart so sharply that he felt he should die. She did not so much as notice his suffering and continued delightedly to revenge herself on him for the annoyance of the morning.
'It's like your brother; he's another pretty Johnny, he is! He promised me two hundred francs. Oh, dear me; yes, I can wait for 'em. It isn't his money I care for! I've not got enough to pay for hair oil. Yes, he's leaving me in a jolly fix! Look here, d'you want to know how matters stand? Here goes then: it's all owing to your brother that I'm going out to earn twenty-five louis with another man.'
At these words his head spun, and he barred her egress. He cried; he besought her not to go, clasping his hands together and blurting out:
'Oh no! Oh no!'
'I want to, I do,' she said. 'Have you the money?'
No, he had not got the money. He would have given his life to have the money! Never before had he felt so miserable, so useless, so very childish. All his wretched being was shaken with weeping and gave proof of such heavy suffering that at last she noticed it and grew kind. She pushed him away softly.
'Come, my pet, let me pass; I must. Be reasonable. You're a baby boy, and it was very nice for a week, but nowadays I must look after my own affairs. Just think it over a bit. Now your brother's a man; what I'm saying doesn't apply to him. Oh, please do me a favor; it's no good telling him all this. He needn't know where I'm going. I always let out too much when I'm in a rage.'
She began laughing. Then taking him in her arms and kissing him on the forehead:
'Good-by, baby,' she said; 'it's over, quite over between us; d'you understand? And now I'm off!'
And she left him, and he stood in the middle of the drawing room. Her last words rang like the knell of a tocsin in his ears: 'It's over, quite over!' And he thought the ground was opening beneath his feet. There was a void in his brain from which the man awaiting Nana had disappeared. Philippe alone remained there in the young woman's bare embrace forever and ever. She did not deny it: she loved him, since she wanted to spare him the pain of her infidelity. It was over, quite over. He breathed heavily and gazed round the room, suffocating beneath a crushing weight. Memories kept recurring to him one after the other--memories of merry nights at La Mignotte, of amorous hours during which he had fancied himself her child, of pleasures stolen in this very room. And now these things would never, never recur! He was too small; he had not grown up quickly enough; Philippe was supplanting him because he was a bearded man. So then this was the end; he could not go on living. His vicious passion had become transformed into an infinite tenderness, a sensual adoration, in which his whole being was merged. Then, too, how was he to forget it all if his brother remained--his brother, blood of his blood, a second self, whose enjoyment drove him mad with jealousy? It was the end of all things; he wanted to die.
All the doors remained open, as the servants noisily scattered over the house after seeing Madame make her exit on foot. Downstairs on the bench in the hall the baker was laughing with Charles and Francois. Zoe came running across the drawing room and seemed surprised at sight of Georges. She asked him if he were waiting for Madame. Yes, he was waiting for her; he had for-gotten to give her an answer to a question. And when he was alone he set to work and searched. Finding nothing else to suit his purpose, he took up in the dressing room a pair of very sharply pointed scissors with which Nana had a mania for ceaselessly trimming herself, either by polishing her skin or cutting off little hairs. Then for a whole hour he waited patiently, his hand in his pocket and his fingers tightly clasped round the scissors.
'Here's Madame,' said Zoe, returning. She must have espied her through the bedroom window.
There was a sound of people racing through the house, and laughter died away and doors were shut. Georges heard Nana paying the baker and speaking in the curtest way. Then she came upstairs.
'What, you're here still!' she said as she noticed him. 'Aha! We're going to grow angry, my good man!'
He followed her as she walked toward her bedroom.
'Nana, will you marry me?'
She shrugged her shoulders. It was too stupid; she refused to answer any more and conceived the idea of slamming the door in his face.
'Nana, will you marry me?'
She slammed the door. He opened it with one hand while he brought the other and the scissors out of his pocket. And with one great stab he simply buried them in his breast.
Nana, meanwhile, had felt conscious that something dreadful would happen, and she had turned round. When
