Chapter 14
You notice different things when you get up early. I noticed how Des Butler locked his front door from the outside and double-checked that his sitting-room window was shut before getting into his van. I noticed that Mary Reynolds arrived at her shop at eight o’clock, even though she didn’t open its doors until nine, and I noticed that Patrick Smyth kissed Brigid on the cheek, at the door of the guesthouse, before getting into his car and driving to work. From my position on the bench in the communal garden I could easily view the morning activities on the main street. I enjoyed observing the world, just watching what everybody was doing, without being part of it. It felt nice to be on the outskirts, to be invisible. I wondered if spirits liked doing that. Being able to go through the world unwatched, nobody knowing they were there. Well, apart from a few. People like Ger. People like me.
I loved the garden. I’d decided it was probably one of my favourite spots in Avarna. I felt a sense of security here that I didn’t get anywhere else. And in the early mornings it seemed there was never anybody there. I could happily stay for ages. Relaxing. Watching.
The river glittered in the sunlight. It was beautiful from a distance but when I walked over and looked more closely I could see that the riverbed was a chaotic mixture of rock and stone, in grimy shades of brown, the outer beauty hiding a dark imperfect base. I picked up a flat stone and skimmed it into the water. It bounced along, sending soft waves rippling across the surface. I repeated this over and over again, then bent down and slid the tips of my fingers through the water. The riverbed seemed closer than it actually was. Just like Jane. Yesterday I had grown so sure that I could help her, but the more I thought about it the more I realized how little I knew. All morning I had been reanalyzing my dreams, reliving the attack and trying to identify any other signs she might have given me. The clues swirled around in my head, occasionally slotting together, but still not making an awful lot of sense.
Then I had an idea. I would write down what I knew so far. I took out my hardback notebook and flicked through the pages of lyrics until I found a blank space. I jotted down the few clues I had.
When I wrote the clues down it didn’t look as if there were very many at all. Ger said that there might be a link between the places that Jane appeared, but I couldn’t think of any link between the dark forest and the cute Cupcake Cafe. I didn’t like how there was no single way to solve this. I was used to problems that had a clear formula, a right and wrong answer. I could work out most maths problems in seconds, but I couldn’t even seem to get started on this one. I had the bag, but it hadn’t really offered me any new information. I was pretty sure the bag was vintage, so that would suggest that Jane was murdered some time ago. But I couldn’t be certain. I don’t know why but I also thought that the same person who killed Beth might have killed Jane too. But I knew from my Internet research, and from talking to Colin, that nobody seemed to know who had killed Beth. Maybe her killer was still in Avarna. Still walking around. That thought scared me a little, but it also gave me hope. If the killer was still here, then I had a better chance of finding them. I wondered what Jane had been like. What she’d looked like, what she’d liked to do. I wondered if she’d ever been in this garden, ever sat on this bench.
The gate creaked, bringing my thoughts back to the present. Colin came into the garden, carrying a bin bag and a rubbish picker. He didn’t notice me sitting there. I watched as he picked up cigarette butts from the water’s edge.
‘Hi,’ I said.
He looked over, surprised to see me. ‘What are you doing up so early?’ he asked, coming over and sitting beside me on the bench.
‘Nothing really.’ I closed my notebook and dropped it into my lap. ‘What are you doing?’
‘I told Mary I’d pick up any rubbish lying around here. She wants it looking spotless for the fete on Sunday. Nick was meant to do it for her, but he’s at home sick. She was already stressing about the broken freezer in her shop so I decided to help her out.’
‘What’s wrong with Nick?’ It hurt to say his name, but I wanted to make sure he was OK.
‘Well, supposedly he has a migraine, but I bet he just fancied a lie-in. He was well able to go to the gig in Sligo with us last night. You should have come – it was deadly.’
‘I had something on… So you’re talking to Nick then? I was worried that maybe I’d caused trouble between you two.’ I hoped that what had happened didn’t come between them.
‘I’m talking to him, but he’s still pretty mad at me for almost breaking his nose with the door. He’ll get over it.’
‘Did he say anything about me?’ I was aware I sounded kind of desperate, but I wanted to know.
‘Em… no, not really.’ Colin looked down at his shoes. He was a terrible liar.
‘So he hates me?’
‘Maybe just give him some space for a while. I know he didn’t do anything to hurt you, but… what got into you anyway?’
‘I just… I don’t really want to talk about it.’
‘Ooh, your songs!’ said Colin, seeing ‘Jacki’s Lyrics’ printed on the front of my notebook. He picked it up. ‘Can I read them?’ he asked, having already opened it. To my horror he was looking at my most recent entry.
‘No, give it back.’ I couldn’t let him see it.
I went to grab the notebook, but Colin stood up and stepped backwards, pulling it out of my reach.
‘Colin, please just give it back to me.’
‘What is this?’
‘Nothing just -’
He scanned down the page, his eyes widening. I tried to wrestle it from him, but it was already too late.
‘Jacki, what’s going on? Why do your lyrics look like a detective’s notes?’
‘I can’t tell you. Just please give it back.’
‘Why can’t you tell me?’ said Colin. ‘We’re mates.’
He held the notebook far above my head. I could tell he wasn’t going to give up. This was it. He was going to think I had completely cracked. I took a deep breath.
‘Prepare to think I am absolutely insane,’ I said. ‘Basically… I was getting these really bad headaches, so I went to the doctor -’
‘Yeah, and I – your friend – went with you, remember?’
‘Course, sorry…’
‘And she said you had allergies.’
‘Well, actually… I didn’t really tell you the full story. She told me I might be dealing with something… something supernatural…’
‘What?’ He looked puzzled, his expression flickering between a smile and confusion.
‘… and she sent me to Ger Rapple, the healer. Do you know him?’
‘Yeah, well, I’ve heard of him. People come from all over the country to see him. He’s supposed to be very good. What did she mean by “something supernatural”?’
‘Well… I’m getting to that. At first I didn’t want to go and see Ger, because I didn’t believe in any of that stuff. But then something really weird happened to me in the bedroom at David’s. I felt like I was being attacked, and my body was on the bed, but my mind was somewhere else – like in the forest. After that I got really scared, so I went to see Ger and he told me that a girl called Jane is trying to contact me. She was murdered and her spirit needs my help to move on. I think she wants me to find out who murdered her, so that she can finally be at peace.’ I just blurted it out, aware of how it all sounded. ‘I know you believe in ghosts, but I don’t expect you to believe this. It’s crazy, but I swear it’s true.’
