one-word answers when I tried to make conversation.
‘How was practice yesterday?’ I asked.
‘Fine.’
I scooched down and put my head on his chest. Nothing. He usually twirled my hair or put his arm round me or tilted his head down and smiled, but not this time. I’d rushed to his house after school and had been really looking foward to seeing him, but now I was begining to wish I hadn’t bothered. I wasn’t even watching the TV, I was just lying there, getting angrier and angrier by the second. I stared at the Nirvana flag on his ceiling, thinking about how annoying this was. I’m a fairly tolerant person and not very many things irritate me. However, there are four things that make me particularly angry:
Mum barging into my room without knocking. She hasn’t ever caught me doing anything, but it’s the principle of it.
Discrimination. Of any kind. It really bugs me.
Bad Thin Lizzy covers. I once heard a terrible cover of ‘The Boys are Back in Town’ at a music festival and felt sick for days. Just because it’s a good song doesn’t mean you have to cover it. Listen to it, appreciate it, don’t rip it to shreds.
Nick’s sulky moods. I’m especially annoyed when he gets into one just before I have to do something important.
We’d been having a silent fight for the past hour – after I’d told him I was going to Dublin for two weeks. It’s not as if I’d told him the full story though. I knew it was crazy. We’d been going out for almost eight months, yet something had stopped me from sharing everything that had happened to me over the last year – communicating with the spirit of Beth Cullen and now Kayla Edwards, and how I was going to help with a Garda operation. I knew everything about him: how he’d cried for three straight days after his gran died, how he was going to be a sound engineer even though his dad said he had to go to university, and how he’d graffitied the wall beside Clancy’s pub, but then swore to Joe that it wasn’t him. And yet, he didn’t know one of the most important things about me…
I sighed. I totally trusted Nick to keep a secret. And I loved him, I really did, but he wasn’t as open-minded as Colin. He was pretty sceptical actually. I used to be too, so I got that. But if I told him the truth now he’d think I was crazy. Certifiably insane. And I didn’t want him to think that – there was no need for him to know just yet anyway. The Gardai had told me not to tell anyone and I’d already told two people. Two was enough, a nice even number that was relatively easy to control.
‘You promised,’ he said suddenly. ‘You said you’d come to my gig next week.’
I sat up on the bed, rested my back against the wooden headboard and sighed.
‘I really need to take this work experience,’ I said. ‘You know they review one unsigned act every month; if I work there, then there’s a good chance they’ll listen to my CD.’ I regretted saying it as soon as I had. It sounded like I valued the slight possibility of getting a review more than going to his guaranteed headline show. Which wasn’t true. But I couldn’t tell him the truth – I would lose him. I would lose him over something I couldn’t explain.
‘But you promised you’d come on Thursday; it’s our first headline gig and you know what a big deal it is to me.’
‘Yes, I know,’ I said. ‘But I can’t miss this opportunity, Nick. It’s
‘You didn’t even tell me you’d applied.’ He looked hurt, which made me feel even worse.
‘I didn’t think I’d get it,’ I said.
The lies were stacking up now. It had become so easy.
‘I’m going to miss you,’ he said. He kissed me on the cheek. I tried not to smile, but I wasn’t capable, my anger was steadily dwindling. I could feel a shift in the air, that moment when you know somebody isn’t mad at you any more. I was relieved. I hated fighting with him.
‘I’ll miss you too,’ I said, lying back down beside him.
‘Then don’t go,’ he said, kissing me on the neck, right on my heart-shaped freckle. He always did it, and it always made me feel safe.
‘I have to,’ I said.
‘Well, in that case, I better give you this today.’ He turned round and opened his bedside locker and, to my surprise, took out a red box with a little bow on it. I wasn’t expecting any presents. He didn’t say anything, just handed it to me. I opened it up to find a red bracelet – a pretty design of woven stainless steel. I took it out of the box and noticed that it felt familiar.
‘Is this made from -’
‘Guitar strings,’ he said, taking the words out of my mouth.
‘That’s so cool!’ I said, examining it more closely. ‘It’s lovely, Nick, but what’s the occasion?’
‘It’s for our eight-month anniversary. Seeing as you won’t be here on the actual day, I thought you should have it now.’
I felt a pang of guilt. I’d forgotten about our anniversary. Nick always remembered – it was so sweet – and the bracelet was gorgeous. It made me so happy when he did things like that.
‘Thanks, Nick,’ I said. ‘It’s lovely.’
‘Sorry for getting upset,’ he said. ‘I just had a whole evening planned, and it’s a weekday so I figured you’d be in Avarna.’
‘I’ll be back before you know it,’ I reassured him. I slipped the bracelet on to my wrist and snuggled into him.
‘You should come over on Sunday,’ he said. ‘Before you go?’
‘I can’t,’ I replied, without looking at him. ‘I think my mum wants to leave really early.’ Another lie to add to my collection. But maybe lies weren’t so bad if they were what people would prefer to hear.
Chapter 4
Getting help from the local healer was another thing that Nick just wouldn’t understand. But Ger Rapple had practically saved my life last year and I needed him again now.
The grass on the mountainside up to Ger’s house was still wet with dew, and white butterflies danced through the air like confetti. I took my grey sweater out of my bag and put it on – it was a bit cold up the mountain for just a T-shirt. The stones on the path crunched under my trainers, and the only other sound I heard was birds singing in the distance. As I turned the corner and saw Ger’s house up ahead, I thought back to last year, to the last time I’d walked up this way. I’ll never forget that day, how I arrived at Ger’s house in a panic, covered in bruises that I couldn’t explain. I’d been scared to death because I couldn’t figure out what was happening to me. He’d been the one to explain everything – that a murdered woman was trying to contact me, and that the phantom bruises were just one of the signs she’d used to get my attention. I’d been so frightened that day and he had helped me. I would be forever grateful.
Even though I’d come a long way since last year, and was now much more in tune with my abilities, he was still the only other person I’d met who totally understood, and the only other person I knew who could also communicate with spirits. I needed his advice again.
When I arrived at the house, I saw Ger sitting in the garden. He spotted me, folded up his newspaper and smiled.
‘Hi, Jacki,’ he said brightly. ‘Long time no see!’
‘Hi, Ger,’ I said, walking across the driveway. The garden looked beautiful – with wild flowers of different colours, and trees in full bloom, their leaves fluttering in the light breeze.
‘Have a seat,’ he said, pointing to the other patio chair. I sat down, taking in the amazing view across Avarna. The lake at the bottom of the mountain shimmered in the sunlight, the ruined castle standing majestically at its shore.
‘Any news?’ asked Ger.
‘Lots,’ I said. ‘You were right. When you said last summer that a unique path had been chosen for me, you weren’t exaggerating. Beth isn’t the only spirit I have to help.’ Ger gave me a knowing nod and I took the blue folder
