Never Knowing

“Call and arrange for her to stay longer, we’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Ten minutes later tires crunched on gravel. I peeked out the front window — I’d been lurking in the living room, as far from the box as I could get — and watched as a black Chevy Tahoe pulled up, with Billy at the wheel. It was barely parked before Sandy climbed out. Even though it was cloudy, they were both wearing sunglasses.

I whipped open the front door. “You have to get that box out of here.”

Billy said, “We’ll be as quick as we can.”

Inside the house, they pulled on gloves and examined the box and the earrings while I sat at the table. Moose rested his round bottom on my feet, growling at the police under his breath.

My cell phone rang on the table. Sandy and Billy turned and looked at me.

“It’s probably Evan.” I picked it up and checked the call display, then jumped to my feet. “I think it’s him.” I held the phone out like I was hoping one of them would answer.

Sandy’s voice was clipped. “Is it the same number as before?”

“I don’t think so. But the prefix looks the same — I don’t know how he got my cell number.”

The ringing stopped.

I said, “What do we—”

Sandy grabbed the phone out of my hand and checked the call display.

“Pen?”

“Drawer behind you.”

She yanked open the drawer, found a pen and paper, and scribbled something down. She handed Billy my cell, then went into the other room with her phone. She was talking quickly into it, but I couldn’t hear the words. Her hand moved in the air in rapid jerks.

I sat back down with a thud and stared at Billy. “It’s him. I know it.”

Now Billy checked the call display on my cell. “Let’s just wait and see if he calls back.”

“What if he senses you’re here and flips out and—”

“One step at a time. Looks like he might’ve called from a cell this time, so right now Sandy’s contacting a service provider. Hopefully, they’ll be able to triangulate the call.”

“Triangulate?”

“If he’s in a populated area near multiple cell phone towers we can narrow down his location to within a two-hundred-meter radius, about the length of two football fields. But if he’s in a remote area where there’s only one tower, or on the move, that zone could be several miles. If he calls back, just take a deep breath, pretend we aren’t here, and let him do the talking. It’s going to be fine. You can handle this, Sara.” Sandy moved farther into the living room. Her voice sounded angry.

I said, “Those are Julia’s earrings. They have silver leaves, just like she said. He took them from her when he—” I covered my mouth with one hand.

Billy said, “You okay, Sara?”

I shook my head.

“Take a couple of really big breaths in through your nose, try to imagine the air going deep into your lungs, then blow out through your mouth until there’s nothing left.”

“I know how to breathe, Billy. What if the earrings have blood on them and—”

“Take a deep breath.” His voice was firm.

I took a quick one. “I’m just saying he might have ripped them from her and—”

“Right now your body is going into fight-or-flight. You need to calm down or nothing I say will register. Put your hand on your chest and focus on it lifting as you breathe. Don’t think about anything but your hand. It will help, Sara.” “Fine.” I did as he suggested, holding his gaze while my chest rose and fell, my eyes conveying I’m only doing this because you’re making me.

He smiled and motioned for me to do it again. Finally he said, “I was right, wasn’t I?

I actually did feel a lot better, but I said, “Just give me a minute.” In the downstairs bathroom I splashed cold water on my face. Then I stared in the mirror at my watering eyes and flushed face, at my hair. His hair. I wanted to shave it all off.

Sandy and Billy were waiting in the kitchen. Sandy paced, Billy leaned against the counter with Moose in his arms. Moose squirmed at the sight of me and Billy let him down, saying, “All right, all right.”

Sandy smiled. “Feel better?” But the smile didn’t reach her eyes and her body radiated tension.

The earrings were in a plastic bag on the counter beside Billy. So was the box.

Evidence.

Billy got me a glass from the dish tray and ran me some water. As he handed it to me I said, “Thanks.”

He nodded and crossed his arms across his chest and leaned back against the counter. Sandy’s phone rang again and she picked it up.

“What?” Her face flushed as she said into the phone, “That’s not fucking good enough.” She frowned as she listened, running her hand through her hair until it was sticking up.

With my arms wrapped around my body, I leaned against the counter near Billy.

“I can’t believe this is happening.”

Billy said, “It’s a lot to take in.”

“Ya think?”

Sandy flashed us a look, then stalked off to the living room.

Billy lowered his voice and said, “We’ll also have someone check into the depot the package was sent from. Now that we know he has your cell number, we’ll tap it as well. Someone will be monitoring any calls to your landline or cell twenty-four hours a day.” As Billy filled me in on the process, giving me lots of details and facts, my mind began to settle and I felt my confidence come back. Billy was right, I could handle this. Then my cell rang.

Billy grabbed the phone. Sandy closed hers and ran back.

Billy said, “Same number.” Sandy nodded and Billy handed the phone to me.

Sandy said, “Okay, Sara. You can answer it now.” But I couldn’t.

It continued to ring. They stared at me.

Sandy raised her voice. “Answer the phone.”

Billy said, “It’s okay, Sara, just like we talked about. You’ve got it in the bag, you’re ready to go.”

I looked down at the phone in my hand. Every ring clamored in my head. All I had to do was pick it up. Pick it up. Pick—

The ringing stopped.

Sandy said, “Shit! We lost him.”

Billy said, “Sandy, let’s just give her a moment, okay? He’ll call back.”

“If he doesn’t, we lost our only chance to stop him.”

“I’m sorry. I just — I panicked.”

Sandy looked like she was forcing herself to sound patient. “That’s all right, Sara, most likely he’ll call back.” She tried to smile, but I was sure she wanted to slap me. She held out her hand for the phone. “When he calls I’ll pretend to be you.” Billy said, “Do you think that’s a good idea, Sandy? He’s heard her voice.” Sandy glared at him, but he just said, “Don’t worry, you’ll get your chance to rip him apart. When we catch him I’ll leave you alone in the room with him for a couple of hours.” To my surprise, Sandy started to laugh, then pretended to throw her phone at Billy, which made me laugh. The tension faded from the room and I leaned back against the counter. It was okay. If we could still laugh, it was okay.

Billy turned to me. “Sara, I know you’re scared. But I also know you can do it, or we wouldn’t ask. You just have to get over the initial fear — once you start talking you’ll do great. Got any coffee?”

Just as I pointed to the stainless-steel flask behind them on the counter, the cell rang. They spun around.

“Remember, you can do this.” Billy’s voice was low and steady and rang with conviction. “Now pick up the phone!”

I took a deep breath and answered my father’s call.