Off the Rails
Bryant & May #8
2010, EN
? Off the Rails ?
…
The Old Warehouse
231 Caledonian Road
London N1 9RC
THIS BUILDING IS NOW OCCUPIED BY THE PECULIAR CRIMES UNIT UNTIL FURTHER NOTIFICATION FROM THE HOME OFFICE
STAFF ROSTER: MONDAY
Raymond Land, Acting Temporary Unit Chief
Arthur Bryant, Senior Detective
John May, Senior Detective
Janice Longbright, Detective Sergeant
Dan Banbury, Crime Scene Manager/InfoTech
Jack Renfield, Desk Sergeant
Meera Mangeshkar, Detective Constable
Colin Bimsley, Detective Constable
Giles Kershaw, Forensic Pathology
Crippen, staff cat
STAFF BULLETIN BOARD
‘King’s Cross Executioner’ kills PC, escapes custody
A hired killer who left his beheaded victims on building sites in the King’s Cross area would have fatally undermined public confidence in the multimillion-pound project to re-invigorate the former red-light area if he had not been identified, said an official Home Office report last week.
However, the report went on to castigate the Unit bosses for failing to provide adequate security checks at its temporary headquarters, an oversight that resulted in the escape of the suspect.
The investigation had been conducted by London’s Peculiar Crimes Unit, a little-known police division created in 1940 to handle serious crimes that could be considered a threat to public order and confidence. As a secret wartime department, the PCU was allowed to develop many innovative (and questionable) investigative techniques. In the 1950s the Unit fell under the jurisdiction of the Metropolitan Police. Later, it was absorbed into the British Military Intelligence department MI7 to handle cases involving domestic and foreign propaganda. In the last few months, the PCU has found itself increasingly mired in controversy after being placed under Home Office jurisdiction, and the principles upon which it was founded have been called into question.
Ministers accused the management team of failing to follow accepted procedural guidelines. But the PCU’s senior detectives, Arthur Bryant and John May, remained determined to operate on the London streets using investigation techniques that had been refused approval by present-day government officials. As a result, they successfully brought in a suspect known only as ‘Mr Fox’, a hired killer who admitted carrying out the King’s Cross murders for financial gain.
However, what should have been a cause for celebration turned to tragedy after ‘Mr Fox’ succeeded in breaking out of the Unit’s holding cell and stabbing the officer on duty to death. PC Liberty DuCaine lost his life after being attacked by the accused, who then escaped police custody. To date, the killer has not been recaptured.
Despite their exoneration by an independent judicial body, the PCU’s future is looking less secure than ever before in its contentious history.
Is it necessary to remind staff NOT to provide the press with information about the escape of the so-called ‘King’s Cross Executioner’? We don’t want to give tabloid hacks a reason to go through our dustbins for the next six months. DON’T SPEAK TO ANYONE. If you’re in any doubt, talk to me first.
A word of warning about PC Liberty DuCaine’s funeral; his family don’t want any of you lot going anywhere near them this morning. They already had the mayor creeping round for a photo op, and sent him away with a flea in his ear. Send flowers if you want, but stay away from the service.
Further, the resignation of our Liaison Officer, April May, from the Unit is effective immediately, for health reasons. Following the recurrence of her agoraphobia, April is planning to spend some time with her uncle in Toronto. I’m sure you all join me in wishing her well for the future. I thought we should have a whip-round and collect enough money to get her something nice. By the way, when April said she’d like a gift voucher for a couple of hours in a flotation tank, she was, in fact, joking.
As of this morning we now have fully functional computers and phones. You have John May to thank for this. I don’t know how he did it. No-one tells me anything.
Older members of the PCU will recall a pair of utterly useless workmen who sat in our former offices at Mornington Crescent for months, brewing endless pots of tea instead of getting on with their work. You’ll be thrilled to know that another pair of layabouts, two Turkish gentlemen both called Dave, will be arriving today to restore the electrics, woodwork and plumbing, while no doubt offering unsought-for advice on the policing of the capital. Don’t complain; their estimate for the repairs came in a lot lower than anyone else’s. I daresay we’ll find out why in due course.
By the way, there’s a hole in the floor in Mr Bryant’s office. Don’t go near it.
If anyone sees Crippen can you please butter his paws before letting him out? We don’t want him getting lost in this neighbourhood. He’s put on a bit of weight lately, and there are a couple of dodgy kebab shops on the Caledonian Road that look like they could use the meat.
? Off the Rails ?
1
A Private Feud
CONFIDENTIAL
FROM: THE DESK OF LESLIE FARADAY
HOME OFFICE SENIOR POLICE LIAISON
TO: RAYMOND LAND
ACTING TEMPORARY HEAD
PECULIAR CRIMES UNIT
Dear Raymond,
With regard to your apprehension of the hired assassin operating in the King’s Cross area, this so-called
