“No! But we can’t take Chase away from John David!”
“But he has another father! A real father!”
“Maybe John David
We both took a deep breath. “I say we burn this piece of paper,” I said. I looked at my sister-in-law steadily.
“I say we should sleep on it and talk to Aubrey tomorrow,” Melinda countered, neatly reversing her trend of a few moments before.
I was sorely tempted to grab it from her hand and rip it to shreds, as I had the repulsive pictures. Why the hell had I remembered the cushion on the chair? John David would never in a million years have messed with that cushion. If it had crinkled when he sat on it, he still wouldn’t have opened it up, an opinion I based simply on John David’s being a man.
Well, the deed had been done, and we were the possessors of yet another piece of unpleasant knowledge.
Chapter Eleven
When I got home that evening, cooking was the bottom thing on my list of desirable activities. The day after Thanksgiving is just not a day to slave over the stove. That’s pretty much been done. So I was delighted to discover, among the messages on my answering machine, one from Robin inviting Phillip and me out to dinner. I almost dropped the phone in my haste to punch in his number so I could accept.
Phillip, back from a day out with another teenager, was less excited. The company of three adults seemed less appealing to him after a long afternoon with Josh, eyeing girls at the mall. I suspected my brother was lapsing back into his normal self, becoming more relaxed around me, rather than being so anxious to mind his manners and be helpful. He’d absorbed the fact that I wasn’t going to throw him out.
“Can’t I just stay here and eat leftovers?” he said in a voice suspiciously close to a whine.
“No, you can not,” I said in a voice suspiciously close to a direct order. I wondered again why my father hadn’t called to set up the return of Phillip.
Robin’s message was the third I’d listened to. The first two had been from, respectively, Cara Embler (who said she had found Moosie and would keep him at her house until we decided what to do with the cat), and the Clean Scene guy, Zachary Lee (who hoped we had found his service satisfactory and would recommend him to our friends). I looked at my watch and decided not to listen to my remaining messages. I was dusty, dirty, and badly in need of a general cleanup. I was thrilled Moosie had been found, and I made a mental note to call John David the next day and tell him the whereabouts of the little cat.
I told Phillip he looked fine. He hadn’t any more clothes anyway, and I hoped Robin would take that into consideration when he picked out a restaurant. I threw my clothes into the hamper, reflected that laundry day would have to be really soon, and tossed the small Wal-Mart bag I’d brought home with me onto the bathroom counter. Maybe tomorrow morning, I thought. Now was the worst time in the world.
The shower was blissful. I was clean all over, and relaxed, and much more optimistic when I emerged. I looked at myself in the mirror carefully. My bosom looked a little different, the aureoles darker, and when I put on my bra, I noticed that I was very sore indeed.
It took all I had to walk past the small bag, leaving it unopened.
Corinne was really fond of Italian food, and there was a new Italian restaurant about halfway between Lawrenceton and the interstate, an area that was beginning to run together in a big blur of commerce. Actually, the restaurant was not too far from the Grabbit Kwik, the filling station where Sandy Wynn had filled her car’s tank with gas on Monday.
I pushed the death of Poppy out of my mind. I tried not to think of all the unpleasant things Melinda and I had learned today. I forced myself not to think of the bag on the counter of my bathroom.
All that not thinking left my mind pretty empty. I’m afraid I wasn’t a very good conversationalist that night. I made an attempt to be a good listener, to encourage Corinne to talk, so I wouldn’t seem stupid by my silences. And I asked Robin a lot of questions. Phillip decided to talk about drug use in his school in California, to impress us unworldly southerners, I suppose. Robin reminded him in a few well-chosen anecdotes that he had spent the past two years living in Los Angeles among the movie crowd, and any stories Phillip chose to tell, Robin could easily top.
Corinne, as it transpired, had left her Chihuahua and her toy Manchester in the care of one of her daughters, and she had called to check on their well-being that very afternoon. Corinne was one of those women who had to have something to mother; for all I knew, that made her like most women. Now that her children were very much grown and gone, and her grandchildren visited from time to time but not for days in a row, the dogs had filled that gap for her. Though she was intelligent enough to realize not everyone wants to listen to detailed animal stories, she was besotted enough not to care, and we heard many anecdotes about Punky’s little trick with the bouncy ball, and Percy’s little wake-up routine.
That reminded me that I hadn’t laid eyes on Madeleine in a couple of days, and during a lull in the dog worship, I asked Phillip if he’d seen the massive old cat.
“No,” he said. “Maybe she didn’t like me and so she’s staying away until I leave.”
“Nothing would make Madeleine miss a meal,” I said.
“Was your cat named for the little girl in the books?” Corinne asked brightly.
“No, for the poisoner,” I answered, abstracted. “Madeleine Smith, Glasgow, 1857.”
“Oh,” Corinne said.
We didn’t hear any more dog stories for a while.
When Robin dropped us off, Phillip loped ahead to get in the house to watch some television show he was dying to see. Robin came in the foyer with me and shut the door behind him. He had a big, long, smoochy kiss on his mind, but when he pulled me to him, my sore chest protested.
“Not so tight,” I said, trying to smile.
“What’s wrong?” Not too surprisingly, he was bewildered. I’d been Passionate Woman the night before, and now I was practically pushing him away. But I was so averse to the idea of sex that I would have kicked him in the shins if he’d suggested it. I answered him by bursting into tears.
“What?” Terrified, Robin gripped my elbows. “What’s wrong? Are you upset about Poppy? Madeleine? I’ll look for her tomorrow, I swear, baby.”
“No, not that.” I wanted to tell him about my long, unpleasant day, and I wanted to tell him what I was beginning to suspect might be the truth. But this wasn’t the place, and his mother was waiting out in the cold in the car for him to return.
“Your mom leaves Monday?” I sobbed.
“No, I forgot to tell you. Before she left home, she changed her reservation, because the airline called her with a last-minute cancellation,” Robin said. “She leaves tomorrow afternoon. One of her best friends lost his son in an accident overseas, and the memorial service is scheduled for Sunday afternoon. Mom wants to be back for it. It’s just amazing she was able to get a seat on the plane. She was on the phone for hours, she told me, but she got it done.” He sounded admiring. “But tell me what’s wrong.”
“I can’t tell you right now,” I said. I wasn’t actively crying anymore, just kind of giving the occasional sob or gasp. This was crazy. I had no control over it whatsoever. I was just along for the ride. “Lots of stuff happened today. We need to talk tomorrow, after you take your mom to the airport. Call me.”
“Sure,” he said. Hesitantly, he leaned over and gave me a peck on the forehead. That was easier for him to reach anyway.
I was almost too tired to take off my clothes. I wished my brother good night, asked him to check the doors before he went to bed, cast a disconsolate look at Madeleine’s food bowl-still full-and tucked myself into bed. I thought I might lie awake a little and rehash the day, but the minute my head came into contact with my pillow, I was out.
Someone was shaking me.
