Imogen wanted to tell them they didn’t know what he was really like, but there had been more than enough interest in her relationship with Tom. She was fairly sure that a lot of those there were hoping that there would be some juicy titbit of gossip in his speech.
‘Here he is now,’ she heard someone say, and she turned to see Tom filling the doorway, looking stern and massive and gorgeous. Imogen’s heart ripped at the sight of him. How did he do that? All he had to do was stand there and look like that, and her breath caught and longing snarled in her like barbed wire.
Across the room his eyes met hers for a long, jarring moment, then he was looking away, inclining his head to hear something the Director of HR was saying. He nodded, and then stepped up onto a dais at the front of the room.
Imogen was being nudged forward too. She knew what to expect. She had been to enough excruciating farewell bashes. There would be an awkward speech, the presentation of a jokey present and a gift token of some kind, and then it would be her turn to make a speech. Well, there was nothing to be done but hope that it was over as soon as possible.
But what if Tom left as soon as the speeches were over? She wouldn’t have a chance to say goodbye to him properly, Imogen realised in a sudden panic. She didn’t want to say it in front of everyone after all. She wanted to tell him what he had meant to her, but how could she do that with them all watching?
Someone was chinking a glass, and the room fell silent while Imogen was still feverishly trying to work out how she could tell Tom what she felt. All at once it was imperative that she did. How could she have even thought she could go away without saying anything?
She barely heard the Director of HR introducing Tom, but she saw Tom take a step forward and clear his throat. He looked very grim, as if he would rather be almost anywhere else, and Imogen didn’t blame him.
Tom looked at the sea of faces turned expectantly towards him. They were all waiting for him to deliver the usual tribute: always ready with a smile…will be much missed…wishing her all the best on her travels, blah, blah, blah. Tom had it all ready but, as he opened his mouth, he realised that he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t trot out some bland speech to Imogen. He couldn’t pretend that she was just like everyone else when his heart was seething with the truth.
‘You’re all here because, even though Imogen hasn’t been here very long, she’s become part of the company,’ he began slowly. ‘She’s been a good colleague to you and I’m sure you’re going to miss her, but you’re not going to miss her the way I will. When Imogen walks out of the door tonight, it’s going to be like a light in my life that’s been switched off.’
There was a sudden riveted silence in the room as everyone did a double take and checked with their neighbour that they hadn’t misheard.
‘The thing is, I’ve got used to her smile, to the way she sucks in her breath when she’s annoyed.’ Tom could hardly believe what he was saying, but the words just kept coming. ‘I’ll miss how she laughs on the phone, the perfume that she always wears. I’ll miss the way my heart stops whenever she walks into the room, and how the day seems brighter and better when she’s there.’
The room had fallen utterly silent by now, but Tom had forgotten everyone else. His attention was fixed on Imogen, who had been pushed to the front and was staring at him, blue eyes enormous. Now that he had started, it was easy, he realised. All he had to do was tell her everything that had been churning inside him since they’d returned from Coconut Island.
‘I’m sorry if I’m embarrassing you,’ he told her. ‘If it’s any comfort, I know I’m making the most colossal fool of myself too, but I just can’t let you go without telling you how I feel. I’ve tried not to need you. I told myself that I would soon get used to it once you’d gone, but it’s too late for me now. If you’re not there, I can’t get comfortable, nothing seems quite right, and when I look at what my life will be without you, I don’t see success, I just see a flat, empty tundra I have to get across somehow.’
Imogen was still staring incredulously. Tom didn’t blame her. He had never taken such a risk before, had never felt as if he were at the mercy of forces beyond his control the way he did now. He was terrified.
‘I love you,’ he told her, without taking his eyes from hers. ‘There, I’ve said it! I didn’t want to fall in love with you-I didn’t think I
‘I wasn’t going to say anything,’ he went on after a moment. ‘I thought it would be awkward and embarrassing for both of us-as indeed it has been!’ he added with a rueful smile. ‘But you told me once that sometimes we have to be prepared to fail, and I guess that’s what I’m doing now, but I don’t want you to go without telling you what you’ve done for me. You’ve changed my life. I didn’t understand when you told me that you were looking for someone who would complete you, but I do now. You’ve made me realise that I don’t have your warmth and your laughter and that without them, without
He hesitated, wondering if he was making sense. ‘I thought I was comfortable before. I thought I knew exactly what I wanted and what I needed to do, but the truth is that knowing you is the only thing that makes my life feel worthwhile.’
To his horror, Tom saw tears shining in Imogen’s eyes. ‘You don’t need to worry,’ he hurried on. ‘I’m not expecting you to say anything. I know you’ve got plans, and I hope you’ll have a wonderful time. You deserve to be happy. I just wanted…just wanted to thank you,’ he said, losing the thread at last. ‘For everything you’ve been, and everything you’ve done. I’ll never forget you.’
There was another deafening silence. Nobody moved. They were clearly all waiting to see if he was planning on humiliating himself some more.
Imogen opened her mouth and then closed it again, unable to speak.
‘Anyway,’ said Tom too heartily, ‘I believe we have a present for you.’ He picked it up from the table and stood holding it, not sure what to do with it next.
He felt as if he had jumped off the edge of a cliff and was still bracing himself for a crash landing. It was a little late to realise that he had absolutely no idea of how he was going to get himself out of here.
But Imogen was moving at last. She stepped onto the dais while the entire room held its breath.
‘I don’t want a present,’ she said very clearly, finding her voice at last. ‘You’ve just given me everything I could ever want or ever need.’
Half the women in the room sighed.
Was that a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth? Hope began to beat wildly against Tom’s ribs as he looked into Imogen’s blue, blue eyes.
The Director of HR cleared his throat. ‘I think perhaps Mr Maddison would like to say goodbye to Imogen alone,’ he said firmly. ‘The rest of us can continue the party in the pub.’
Reluctantly, people began to leave, looking over their shoulders at the scene at the front of the room, where Tom and Imogen stood facing each other, apparently oblivious to the room emptying.
Even when the door had closed behind the last of them and cut off the buzz of speculation outside, neither of them moved immediately.
‘Sorry,’ said Tom. ‘Was that very embarrassing?’
‘Very,’ said Imogen unsteadily. ‘And very beautiful.’
Stepping closer, she took the present from his nerveless hands and put it carefully on the table.
‘Did you mean to say all that tonight?’ she asked him.
He shook his head. ‘I had another speech entirely prepared but, when it came to it, I realised I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t say goodbye to you like that. I can’t say goodbye to you at all.’
‘Then don’t.’ Imogen closed the distance between them at last. Putting her arms round his neck, she pressed her face into his throat. ‘Don’t say goodbye, Tom. I can’t bear it if you do.’
Instinctively, Tom’s arms closed around her and he drew her hard against him, breathing in the scent of her, savouring the warmth and softness of her, his head reeling with the relief of holding her again.
‘Imogen…does that mean you’ll stay?’
‘I will if you want me.’
‘Want you?’ Tom laughed raggedly. ‘Imogen, you have no idea how much I do! I’m so in love with you, I don’t know what to do with myself. You’ve turned my life upside down, and now you’re the only one who can put it all
