Here Comes The Bride

‘The brutal truth is that I need the money,’ she went on, with less of an edge to her voice. ‘And I want to prove myself, too. I’ve never had a chance to work like this before. Everything is much more professional and high- powered.’

‘In what way?’ asked P.J.

‘I’ve got a very demanding boss. She always looks immaculate, and I’m supposed to look the same.’ Nell’s mouth turned down at the corners as she thought about Eve and the impossible standards she set. ‘It’s all about the company’s image, she says, but it’s a bit of a strain having to look perfectly groomed the whole time.’

P.J.’s blue eyes rested for a moment on Nell in her jogging pants and trainers and old sweatshirt, and his mouth quirked.

Nell flushed. He didn’t need to say anything. ‘I change when I get there,’ she told him a shade defensively. ‘I had an accident last year and broke my ankle and my wrist. I’m fine now, but walking long distances is hard except in sensible shoes, so I tend to wear these for the commute and put on my work shoes when I get there.’

‘Very sensible,’ said P.J. gravely, but his eyes danced in a way that made Nell feel distinctly ruffled.

‘Normally I’d be dressed properly by now,’ she told him, even as she wondered why she was bothering to justify her appearance to him. ‘But I’ve got an important meeting this afternoon, and I’m going to pick up my suit from the dry-cleaner’s on the way in.’

If she hadn’t overslept, she would have had her makeup on by now, too. It wasn’t fair. If she had to bump into P.J. she could at least have been looking her best. That was just typical of her life at the moment, thought Nell fatalistically. It was about time something started to go right for a change.

‘How is your ankle now?’ he asked.

‘It’s fine,’ she said truthfully. The rest had done it good, and she could only feel a slight throb now. ‘I won’t have to walk much further on it today, anyway. We’ve got an important meeting this afternoon, but fortunately my boss is a great believer in taxis, so we’ll probably get driven door-to-door.’

P.J. looked interested. ‘What’s the meeting about?’

‘I don’t know much about it, to tell you the truth,’ Nell admitted. ‘I know that we’ve got an important contract to recruit someone for a senior position in some big company, and Eve-my boss-seems to think that if we do a good job, we’ll be in a good position to do a lot more recruitment work for them. She wants me to go along and learn the ropes about finding out what they really want-which is apparently not always what they say they want! Fortunately I’m not going to be called upon to do more than look cool and professional and as if I know what’s going on.’

‘And won’t you?’

‘No,’ said Nell frankly. ‘I’m terrified that someone will ask me a question, but I’m hoping that if I keep my mouth closed and look enigmatic enough, it won’t be too obvious that I haven’t got a clue about what’s happening.’

‘Ah, then you have already learnt the secret of professional success!’ said P.J., amused. ‘I can tell you’ll go far!’

They both laughed, but found their smiles fading at exactly the same moment, as if both unnerved by how quickly they had slipped back into the old, easy ways.

Constraint seeped back into the air. Nell stared desperately out of her window at the commuters streaming out of the tube station they were just passing. She was one of them usually. That was her life, not sitting in this luxurious car, cocooned in comfort with P.J. beside her. She belonged in the crowd, glancing enviously at those who could travel in such comfort. She didn’t belong with P.J., not now.

She must remember that.

It would be too easy to forget if she were to spend any longer in P.J.’s company. The tug of attraction, the tug of the past, was very strong. Nell was conscious of having to dig in her heels mentally to stop herself falling back under the old spell, the one that made it seem as if everything were easy and natural between them.

But how could it be after all this time? This was just a chance encounter, a brief interlude, and it would be a mistake to pretend that it could always be like this. P.J. was a different man, one whose assurance and attractiveness had left her feeling flustered and more disturbed than she wanted to admit. Things might feel the same, but they weren’t, and if she forgot that it would make going back to her real life so much harder. The past was the past. Better if it stayed that way.

As the silence lengthened in the car, and the memory of their shared laughter thrummed in the air, P.J. drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and thought about what Janey had said.

‘You’ll never move on until you’ve got Nell Martindale out of your system. Look her up. She won’t be the same pretty young girl, and you won’t feel the same about her.’

P.J. hadn’t wanted to do that. He hadn’t wanted to see that Nell had grown older, or to think that she had lost her charm. He hadn’t wanted to face the fact that the old dream had died.

But now fate had put her in his way, and she was older, just as he had feared. Older and warier, with faint lines starring her eyes, but she was still beautiful, and the warmth and the charm were still there. Why not see if the spark could be rekindled?

They were edging over Waterloo Bridge now. They would be in the city soon, and then this strange meeting would be over. Why not take advantage of coincidence?

‘What are you doing tonight?’ he asked, breaking the silence so abruptly that Nell started in her seat.

‘Tonight?’ she echoed a little breathlessly.

‘I was wondering if I could take you out to dinner to make up for almost knocking you over,’ said P.J., hating himself for sounding so stiff and awkward. This was Nell, for heaven’s sake. They had been friends and lovers for years. He ought to be able to ask her to dinner without stumbling over his words or making up an excuse to want to see her again.

‘I can’t tonight.’ Nell didn’t know whether to be glad or sorry that she had a real excuse. ‘I’ve got a date.’

‘A date?’

P.J. looked so taken aback that Nell was ruffled. ‘There’s no need to sound so surprised!’ she said shortly, wondering if he had been expecting her to fall at his feet with gratitude at his casual invitation. ‘It’s allowed. I’m a free agent.’

‘I didn’t mean that…’ P.J. wasn’t sure what he had meant. He had always thought of Nell as essentially homely, he supposed. She was someone warm and comfortable to curl up with on a sofa, not someone who dressed up and went out on dates.

‘It’s just that you said very firmly that you hadn’t married again,’ he tried to explain, ‘and I assumed…’

‘…that I was too old?’ Nell finished his sentence for him, and P.J. could tell from the brilliance of her smile that he had somehow made things worse for himself.

‘No, of course not-’

‘I am only thirty-seven,’ she said huffily. ‘Not all men fantasise about eighteen-year- old girls, you know. Some even find women my age attractive and desirable.’

‘I know. I’m one of them.’ It was P.J.’s turn to be provoked. He had just asked her out, hadn’t he?

There was an antagonistic pause.

‘So, who’s your date tonight?’ he asked after a moment, wanting to sound casual but afraid that he might have sounded belligerent and sulky instead.

‘His name’s John.’ Nell was feeling spiky and defensive for some reason.

‘Have you been seeing him long?’

There was a distinct edge to P.J.’s voice now, which only made her more determined not to admit that John was a blind date. She didn’t need to account to P.J. for what she did, or whom she met, did she?

‘No, not long, but it’s going very well,’ she said, spotting an opportunity to impress on P.J. that she stood in no need of charitable invitations to dinner from him or anyone else. She wasn’t a sad divorcee, desperate for a night out, whatever he thought.

A muscle tightened in P.J.’s jaw. ‘So, what’s he like, this John?’

‘He’s lovely,’ said Nell, improvising freely. ‘Very kind and funny and intelligent. We get on really well.’ At least, Thea had said that they would. ‘I’m beginning to think he might be the one for me. We’ve started to talk about the future, and, well…it’s still all very new, but I feel quite excited.’

Which would be news to poor John.

‘How did you meet this paragon?’ asked P.J. tightly.

‘Through Thea.’ It was a relief to get back to the truth. ‘She actually set us up on a kind of blind date.’ Nell even