Bad Love

narcissistic, I know, but I figure I'm not doing them much good if I'm fading away. My wife, on the other hand, doesn't mind. She's a real artist with it. Great mom, too.'

We walked to the cafeteria, had coffee and donuts, and chatted for a while about other places he could take his son. As we headed back to the auditorium, I asked him about his connection to the de Bosches.

'Andres was my teacher,' he said, 'in England. I did a fellowship eleven years ago at Southwick Hospital – near Manchester. Child psychiatry and pediatric neurology. I'd toyed with the idea of working for the government and I wanted to see how the Brits ran their system.'

'Neurology?' I said. 'Didn't know de Bosch was interested in the organic side of things.'

'He wasn't. Southwick was heavily biological- still is- but Andres was their token analyst. Kind of a…' He smiled. 'I was about to say 'throwback,' but that wouldn't be kind. It's not as if he was some sort of relic. Quite vital, actually- a gadfly to the hard-wire boys, and don't we all need gadflies.'

We entered the conference room. Ten minutes until the next speech and the place was nearly empty.

'Was it a good year?' I said after we were seated.

'The fellowship? Sure. I got to do lots of long-term depth work with kids from poor and working-class families, and Andres was a wonderful teacher- great at communicating his knowledge.'

I thought: it's not genetic. I said, 'He is a clear writer.'

Rosenblatt nodded, crossed his legs, and looked around the deserted auditorium.

'How's child analysis accepted here?' he said.

'It's not used much,' I said. 'We deal mostly with kids with serious physical illnesses, so the emphasis is on short-term treatment. Pain control, family counseling, compliance with treatment.'

'Not much tolerance for delayed gratification?'

'Not much.'

'Do you find that satisfying- as an analyst?'

'I'm not an analyst.'

'Oh.' He blushed around his beard. 'I guess I assumed you were- then how'd you get involved in the conference?'

'Katarina de Bosch's powers of persuasion.'

He smiled. 'She can be a real ball-breaker, can't she? When I knew her back in England she was just a kid- fourteen or fifteen- but even then she had a forceful personality. She used to attend our graduate seminars. Spoke up as if she was a peer.'

'Daddy's girl.'

'Very much so.'

'Fourteen or fifteen,' I said. 'So she's only twenty-five or -six?'

He thought for a moment. 'That's about right.'

'She seems older.'

'Yes, she does,' he said, as if coming up with an insight. 'She has an old soul, as the Chinese say.'

'Is she married?'

He shook his head. 'There was a time I thought she might be gay, but I don't think so. More likely asexual.'

I said, 'The temptation to think Oedipally is darn near irresistible, Harvey.'

'For girls it's Elektra,' he said, wagging a finger with amusement. 'Get your complexes straight.'

'She drives one, too.'

'What?'

'Her car's an Electra- a big Buick.'

He laughed. 'There you go- now if that doesn't convert you to fervid belief in Freud, I don't know what will.'

'Anna Freud never married, either, did she?' I said. 'Neither did Melanie Klein.'

'What, a neurotic pattern?' he said, still chuckling.

'Just presenting the data, Harvey. Draw your own conclusions.'

'Well, my daughter's damned boy crazy, so I wouldn't get ready to publish just yet.' He turned serious. 'Though I'm sure the impact of such a powerful paternal-'

He stopped talking. I followed his gaze and saw Katarina heading toward us from the left side of the auditorium. Carrying a clipboard and marching forward while looking at her watch.

When she reached us, Rosenblatt stood.

'Katarina. How's everything going?' There was guilt in his voice- he'd make a very bad liar.

'Fine, Harvey,' she said, looking down at her board. 'You're up in two minutes. Might as well take your place on stage.'

• • •

I never saw either of them again, and the events of that autumn soon faded from memory, sparked briefly, the following January, by a newspaper obituary of Andres de Bosch. Cause of death was suicide by overdose- prescription tranquilizers. The eighty-year-old analyst was described as despondent due to ill health. His professional achievements were listed in loving, inflated detail, and I knew who'd provided them.

Now, years later, another spark.

Good love/bad love. De Bosch's term for mothering gone bad. The psychic damage inflicted when a trusted figure betrays the innocent.

So Donald Dell Wallace probably wasn't behind it. Someone else had picked me- because of the conference?

Someone with a long, festering memory? Of what? Some transgression committed by de Bosch? In the name of de Boschian therapy?

My co-chairmanship made me seem like a disciple, but that was my only link.

Some kind of grievance? Was it even real, or just a delusion?

A psychotic sitting at the conference, listening, boiling…

I thought back to the seventy strangers in the auditorium. A collective blur.

And why had Becky Basille's murderer howled 'bad love'?

Another madman?

Katarina might have the answer. But she hadn't had much use for me back in seventy-nine, and there was no reason to believe she'd talk to me now.

Unless she'd gotten a tape, too, and was frightened.

I punched 805 information. There was no Santa Barbara listing for either the de Bosch Institute or the Corrective School. Neither was there an office number for Katarina de Bosch, Ph.D. Before the operator could get away, I asked her to check for a home number. Zilch.

I hung up and pulled out the latest American Psychological Association directory. Nothing there, either. Retrieving some older volumes, I finally found Katarina's most recent entry. Five years ago. But the address and number were those of the Santa Barbara school. On the off chance the phone company had messed up, I called.

A woman answered, 'Taco Bonanza.' Metallic clatter and shouts nearly drowned her out.

I cut the connection and sat at my desk, stroking the top of the bulldog's head and gazing at the coffee stain on the brochure. Wondering how and when enlightenment had given way to enchiladas.

Harvey Rosenblatt.

Half past one made it four-thirty in New York. I got the number for NYU's med school and asked for the department of psychiatry. After a couple of minutes on hold, I was informed that there was no Dr. Harvey Rosenblatt on either the permanent or the part-time clinical staff.

'We do have a Leonard Rosenblatt,' said the secretary. 'His office is out in New Rochelle- and a Shirley Rosenblatt in Manhattan, on East Sixty-fifth Street.'

'Is Shirley an M.D. or a Ph.D.?'

'Um- one second- a Ph.D. She's a clinical psychologist.'

'But no Harvey?'

'No, sir.'

'Do you have any old rosters on hand? Lists of staff members who've retired?'