“But you’re a girl. Girls love horses.”
“Not me. She’s too big. She’ll bite me. Or worse.”
“I see,” Izzy said. “Wait here.”
Seconds later she was back with one of the barn cats in her arms. “This is Alfredo. Are you good with cats?”
“I like cats.” Heidi moved toward her and gently stroked Alfredo. “He’s small.”
“He’s still a kitten. He was born here in the barn. Now I think you’re bigger than Alfredo.”
Heidi actually giggled. “Well, yeah. He’s a cat.”
“Good. Now remember that.” Izzy put Alfredo down.
“What are you doing?” Heidi shrieked. “He’ll be killed.”
“He’ll be fine. Horses and cats usually get along. Watch.”
Izzy couldn’t see very much, but she’d grown up around barn cats and horses. She knew that Alfredo would be fearless in the stall. Sure enough, a few seconds later, Heidi gasped.
“Flower likes him. She’s kind of petting him with her nose. He’s drinking her
“Really? So maybe now you’re not so afraid of Flower?”
“Maybe. But I don’t want to ride her. It’s too high. What if I fall?”
“Then you lie on the ground feeling stupid. Trust me, I’ve done it a thousand times.”
“I’m not riding. Why do you care if I ride?” Heidi’s voice rose with her words until she was practically shouting.
“Because you can’t be afraid all the time. Because you need to learn how to live again and this is a start.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’ve never been set on fire. You can’t know what I go through every day. Don’t talk to me about being afraid. You don’t know anything.”
Izzy blocked the doorway, so Heidi couldn’t get past her and Izzy had no plans to move. She felt bad about the girl’s quiet crying, but she wasn’t going to back down.
“I was in an explosion,” she said. “Does that count?”
There was a sniff, then, “What do you mean?”
“I was on an oil rig that exploded. I don’t remember what happened, mostly because I was busy being tossed up in the air, falling through fire and then landing in the water. I could have drowned. Huh. I never thought of that before. Anyway, I was in the explosion. I had a few cuts and bruises but the big thing is I’m blind. Well, I have thirty percent of my sight, which is pretty darned close.”
“You’re not blind.”
Izzy laughed. “Tell that to my doctor.”
“But you’re so pretty.”
“Thanks, but that doesn’t matter. I get around, but I can’t read or drive.”
Heidi moved closer. “You can’t see me?”
“I can see your shape and the light and dark of colors. Not details.”
“So you don’t know what my face looks like.”
“No. Why? Is there something wrong with it?”
As soon as she asked the question, Izzy wanted to shoot herself. What a stupid thing to say. And here it had only been what? Twenty minutes?
“I’m hideous,” Heidi said, turning away. “A freak. Children run screaming when they see me.”
“So basically you never have to wait in line when you go to Disneyland.”
For the second time in as many minutes Izzy spoke without thinking. But before she could bang her head into the side of the stall, she heard a faint giggle. She breathed a sigh of relief.
“It’s not funny,” Heidi said, even as she giggled harder.
“You’re the one laughing, not me.”
“I know.” She cleared her throat, then chuckled again. “No one talks about how I look except my surgeon and his staff. And my therapist. We’re all supposed to pretend I’m normal.”
“Is that bad?”
“I don’t know. I’m not normal. I’ve had so many surgeries and I’m going to have more. I get scared because it hurts and I just want to be like everyone else.”
“Not an option, kid. Sorry. You’re going to have to be yourself. But you know what? That’s not so bad.”
“That’s what my mom says.”
Izzy winced. “So you’re saying I’m old and mom-like? I’m crushed.”
Heidi laughed again, then stepped toward Flower and patted her neck. “You’re funny.”
“Gee, thanks.”
A loud bell sounded.
“Mealtime,” Izzy said. “You are literally saved by the bell. By the time we’re done with dinner, it will be too late to go riding, so first thing tomorrow, we’re going to take this pony out and see what she can do.”
“Really?”
“You’ll love it. I promise. I’ll be with you every step of the way.”
“But you’re blind.”
“So?”
“You ride horses?”
“Honey, I do everything. Well, e-mail is a challenge. I need to get one of those talking programs.”
“You’re not like anyone I know.”
“I’m going to take that as a compliment,” Izzy said, grabbing Alfredo and walking out of the stall. She set the cat down, then waited until Heidi followed her before securing the low door. “See you tomorrow, Flower.”
The horse neighed.
“Does she understand you?” Heidi asked, sounding intrigued.
“Most of the time. Horses are people, too.”
Heidi laughed.
AFTER DINNER, Heidi followed Izzy into the living room while the other two kids went with Aaron to watch movies in the media room of the main guesthouse.
“Is your hair naturally curly?” Heidi asked as she bounced onto the sofa. “Do you like it?”
“It’s natural and sometimes I like it. Sometimes I want really straight hair, but I’ve learned to live with it.”
“I have straight hair,” Heidi said.
Izzy reached out and touched the silky strands. “Nice. Very soft.”
“My mom buys me this fancy conditioner that makes it shiny and stuff but…”
“But what?”
“No one’s looking at my hair. The scars are all along one side of my face. I’ve got a patch of hair missing where the follicles burned away. My surgeon said we can talk about a transplant, but he says that’s just minor stuff.”
“He’s not a twelve-year-old girl,” Izzy said, aching for her.
“Yeah.” Heidi sighed. “Sometimes I get scared about growing up. About being accepted and stuff.”
“Me, too.”
“What?”
“I have two brilliant and beautiful sisters. Lexi, the oldest, started her own business. It’s a day spa and it’s really successful. My other sister, Skye, runs a foundation. She inherited a bunch of money from our mom and is using most of it to feed hungry children.”
“Wow.”
“Exactly. I’m the screwup. I didn’t go to college and I look for crazy jobs, like ski patrol. I was an underwater welder on an oil rig, which is where the explosion occurred. Now I’m blind and I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“Don’t you work here?”
“Sort of. It’s temporary. Until I can get my life back together.”
“What do you want to do?” Heidi asked.
“I haven’t a clue.”
“Me, either.”
