approachable friend she’d been sharing a comfortable interlude with. There was no point in apologising, the damage was done. She’d all but destroyed the fragile affection that had been growing between them.
“I had thought your antipathy towards me was gone, Isobel. I can do no more. If you won’t accept I’ve changed, meet me halfway in order to make this marriage work, then it will be best for both of us if I no longer spend time with you.”
Helplessly she gazed at him, willing him to understand that sometimes she spoke without thought, did not mean what she said. Pregnancy was making a veritable shrew of her. “I enjoy your company, I shall be sad if you decide to return to Grosvenor Square after all.”
“I’ve no intention of returning to London, this barracks of a place is more than big enough for us to avoid contact if that’s what you wish. I must attend to estate business. Reynolds has been clamouring for an interview since yesterday.” He nodded and strode away. The bed chamber seemed unpleasantly empty without him.
Life confined to her apartment was going to be tedious without his company. These past weeks she’d come to eagerly anticipate the evenings, looking forward to the time they spent together. Now her sharp tongue had driven him away—her life would be so much simpler if she could finally learn to trust him again.
“What do you think, Mary? Is lemon yellow a suitable colour for the curtains and upholstery in the nursery?” Isobel viewed the samples spread out on the table in her sitting room. “I must make a decision today as it could be as little as four weeks before I’m delivered.”
“It’s an unusual choice, my lady, but will suit either a boy or a girl. I know you have selected two girls from the staff already working here but what about the nanny? Does his lordship have someone in mind for that position?”
“No, he is leaving all such domestic details to me. When he went to Town last week he set enquiries in motion. It would seem there’s always a family who can recommend someone suitable.” She heaved herself to her feet. Her mobility was sadly restricted lately as her girth had dramatically increased. Alexander had laughingly he told her that very morning if she did not give birth soon she would pop. She had not found the comment particularly amusing.
Fortunately since her outburst a few weeks ago their relationship had drifted back to amicable. Unlike her
This was a highly unsuitable topic of conversation between a member of staff and herself, but Mary was first and foremost her friend. Even Alexander appeared to have accepted the closeness of their relationship and no longer stared haughtily down his nose when he came in and found them closeted together. Possibly the fact Mary was a far better housekeeper than ever Maynard had been, did much to improve his opinion of her.
“At first I thought it was an act in order to win you over, but as the months have passed I truly believe he loves you and has made himself a better person because of it.”
“I’ve always loved him deep in my heart but was too scared to admit it. I must find him at once and tell him. He will be so happy.”
Alexander rubbed his eyes and yawned, he was finding it damned difficult to sleep. Having his chambers so far from hers meant he was constantly on the alert in case she needed him. He had got up three times last night to check everything was as it should be at the back of the house.
The list of possible candidates for the position of nanny was not over long and the first two seemed the most likely. One had been with her previous employers for fifteen years, first as a nursery maid and then promoted to running the nursery herself. The other had been with the family for a shorter time, but had two other glowing recommendations from previous positions.
He would take the information up to Isobel directly. As Lady Everton had told him, most households would have everything in place three months before the due date and not have left it so late. A decision would have to be made today; Jamieson had told him the baby was readying itself for delivery. Isobel had yet to select the material for the curtains in the nursery.
He jumped to his feet as the familiar footsteps of his beloved approached the study. This was no longer a place where she was not welcome and she often joined him in the afternoon and sat reading with her feet up whilst he worked on his papers. He stepped out into the spacious corridor to greet her.
She smiled at him, her face illuminated by such love his chest squeezed making breathing impossible. He couldn’t speak, his heart was full, and tears filled his eyes. He opened his arms and she fell into them.
“Alexander, I had to come right away. I’ve just discovered I still love you, indeed that I love you more today than I ever did before.”
She was obliged to stand sideways as even
“I had no wish to wait another second to tell you.” Her eyes shone, he wanted to sweep her up and make love to her despite her advanced pregnancy. “I’ve finally chosen the fabric for the nursery and sent Sam to the warehouse to collect it. Fortunately Mary has a team of expert seamstresses assembled and the covers for the furniture, the curtains and everything else will be completed by the end of the week.”
“I’ve a list of possible candidates to take charge of the nursery. There are two that I think we should interview but I shall leave the decision to you.”
He knelt at her side and tenderly lifted her feet before fetching the various letters of recommendation. Perching himself on the edge of the sofa he watched her peruse the contents—he loved the way her nose crinkled when she was concentrating. He slid in behind her legs and dropped them back into his lap. As usual she was wearing no stockings and had kicked off her slippers as soon as she’d sat down.
Whilst she read he massaged her feet and ankles worried they were more swollen than they had been yesterday. Jamieson had warned him that swelling of this sort was a sign that she needed to do less. He would insist she stayed in bed until noon and then only got up to rest on her day bed in her parlour.
“I like the sound of Nanny Cooper. Which one did you prefer?”
“She was top of my list; the woman from the Everton household was the second. Would you like me to write and offer the position to Nanny Cooper?”
“Please, it might be better to send it express. Mary thinks I should be resting more and leaving the organisation of the nursery to a nanny.”
“Exactly so. I am going to insist, sweetheart, that until the baby is born you spend most of the time with your feet up. Jamieson told me swollen ankles are not a good sign.” He braced himself for the argument but to his surprise she nodded.
“I shall do so on one condition, my love, that you move into my apartment with me.” Her eyes danced as she continued. “I am quite certain from the size of the bed you never intended I sleep alone.”
His shout of laughter sent the papers flying. “Thank the good Lord for that, I’ve been prowling the corridors these past nights checking you were well. If I am at your side then I shall have a decent night’s sleep at last.”
“Then you had better get your man to bring your belongings down to me. There are, I could not help but notice, my dear, two quite distinct dressing rooms and enough closet space for an army to place their garments.” He tickled her feet in a bid to avoid answering that question but she was having none of it. “You always intended to be with me, didn’t you?”
His mischievous smile answered her question. “I hoped to one-day, I never dreamt you would welcome me so soon.”
“We have been through so much these past months, but I truly believe I can finally move forward and look to the future with happiness. There’s something I wished to ask you, Alexander, and now seems as good a time as any.” She needed to have his guidance on a matter she knew nothing about and could not in all conscience discuss with Mary. The only person she could talk to was her husband. Until today she had not believed the matter of any urgency.
His eyebrow quirked. “Go on, sweetheart, what do you wish to know?”
“I’ve to tell you that I haven’t enjoyed being pregnant, it does not seem to suit me as it does other women. If our baby is a boy …” His eyes dimmed as if a candle had been blown out inside him. Surely he did not believe she
