Jaz Parks 5 - One More Bite

“Admi [sizt st to me you don’t miss—”

“This is about us! About our chance at eternity. Even Scidair finally had to leave the Path. If we succeed we will live forever!”

Low-voiced reply that I missed most of. The only words I caught were “I suppose” and “diamonds” before the women paused to think. Finally Flordaih said, “I might have an idea. Come on.” Bustle of big women’s thighs brushing quickly against one another as they rushed to the stairs. I sped down ahead of them.

“The Scidairans are on the move,” I reported, glad that the party line picked up whispers.

“We will meet you downstairs,” said Vayl.

“I’m getting the girls first,” Cole said.

“Bring me back something to eat that isn’t fruit,” Albert demanded. I knew we should’ve left him out of the loop!

I preceded Floraidh and Dormal into the lounge. As soon as they saw me they stopped whispering like a couple of backbiting adolescents and gave me their version of a friendly smile. “Ready to go?” asked Floraidh sweetly.

“Just about,” I said. “You know men. Always futzing with their clothes and makeup. I’m sure they’ll be down soon.”

She didn’t even blink at my joke. Just turned to Dormal and said, “Would you be a dear and check the oven? I can’t remember if I left it on or not.” Her head swiveled back to me as if an invisible hand had cranked it. “You know, if I leave that blessed old cooker on long enough without something stewing inside it, the stench begins to be enough to raise the dead!” She howled, opening her mouth wide to let all the mirth escape in a gust that might have knocked over a less hardy broad. Since I’d left Lucille in charge, she joined in Floraidh’s laughter, though she cut it off as soon as Dormal returned.

“All set,” she said, wiping her fingers on a blue-and-white-checked towel. What had she done in the brief time she’d been gone? She was sweating like a shot-putter at the World Championships. And I was pretty sure that gray smudge in the middle of her forehead wasn’t from bread mold.

What are you biddies up to? Before I could ask any probing questions, the rest of the guests trickled downstairs, first Vayl, then Cole, Viv, and Iona, followed by Rhona and the Haighs.

Iona had changed into a long denim skirt with a brown lace inset. It was held up by her teardrop belt, which she must’ve taken a buffer to since we’d last seen her, because it was now so shiny it almost glowed. Into it she’d tucked a gold short-sleeved sweater. Low-heeled boots completed the outfit.

Viv wore a boring beige knit dress that at least flattered her curves, and a pair of crimson heels with neat black bows at the toes. She and Cole were grinning at each other as they compared footwear, since his red high-tops matched her pumps. He’d opted for a pair of khakis with more pockets than a pool table and a black T-shirt with a Halloween ghost pictured on the front. The caption read, look after you leap club: charter member.

Rhona and Lesley Haigh hadn’t changed, though they’d definitely refreshed their lipstick. Why did o [ickdthlder ladies always go for cherry red? It made them look like corpses. And Humphrey had decided he needed extra cologne, which circled him like a life preserver as he came up to me.

I smiled as my nose hairs began to burn. Humphrey responded with equal kindness. “I couldn’t help but notice that lovely ring on your finger,” he said, motioning to Cirilai. “Curse of the trade, I suppose. Do you mind if I take a closer look?”

“Oh.” Shit yes! Get away from me, you reeking old penny-pincher! I raised my hand. “Not at all.”

He fished a jeweler’s glass out of his pocket and squinched it into his left eye. “Oh, my, that is exquisite. Where, may I ask, did you get it?”

“From Vayl.”

When Humphrey glanced his way, my sverhamin added, “It is a family piece.”

“Ahh.” He turned back to his inspection. “Would you mind taking it off? If I could just take a gander at the inside of the band—”

“Yes,” I said flatly, leaving Lucille to be polite to some other stranger. This one didn’t deserve her anymore. When he raised his eyebrows at me, as if he didn’t take my meaning, I pulled my hand out of his paw and wiped it down my pants. Suddenly I wouldn’t blame his wife if she had picked up a little hobby. This son of a bitch made me want to kill things, and I already had that outlet.

“Pardon me?” he said.

“I don’t take it off.” Okay, I had that one time. But it didn’t count because I’d been under the influence of funky Vampere powers. Plus Vayl had been acting like an ass. For the same reason.

Lesley bustled to my rescue. “Leave the poor thing alone, Humphrey,” she said, laying her hands on her husband’s tweed-covered arm. “Engaged girls don’t like to remove their rings.”

“Well, it’s damned hard on the stones and the settings,” Humphrey declared. “Better get that cleaned and checked regularly,” he said over his shoulder as his wife dragged him toward the front door, past Rhona and Floraidh, who were talking transportation.

“We were thinking of following you, if that’s all right,” Rhona said. “But is Castle Hoppringhill hard to find? And will you leave Tearlach open? We may want to return earlier than you’d planned to.”

Floraidh tapped her fingernail to her chin. “The castle is straight down the road, about three kilometers from here. And your room key will open the front door.” She dropped her arms as if coming to a decision. “Do let me know if you decide to leave GhostCon before me, won’t you? I’ll make sure Dormal goes back with you in case you find there’s something you need before you go to sleep.”

Yeah, you sound like a concerned innkeeper, but you just don’t want them nosing around your goodies unsupervised, do you, Floraidh?

As if she’d read my mind, the Scidairan shot me a sharp look. “Where is your man, Albert?” she asked.

The lie slid off my lips ready-made, as if my subconscious had done the baking in advance. I said, “The trip