What Would Mr. Darcy Do?

Did she have any idea of how he reacted when she said things like that? Unable to keep himself from touching her any longer, he cautiously and unobtrusively slipped his hand behind her and rested it on her lower back. With his thumb, he traced delicate circles over her spine, and smiled with satisfaction as he noted her response in the flushing of her cheeks and parted lips.

A trifle unsteadily, she said, “I must remind you that we are in church, sir.”

His eyes locked with hers. “And I am doing my best to encourage you to enter into the state of holy matrimony as soon as possible.”

“Lizzy!” Mrs. Bennet’s piercing voice penetrated their private world. “You are needed! Oh, this is too vexing!”

They both started, and as Darcy finally took in their surroundings, he saw everyone’s eyes on them, including a clearly amused Mr. Bennet.

The parson coughed, and began to explain to Elizabeth her role in the ceremony, allowing Darcy a few moments to collect himself before receiving his own set of instructions, as if he could concentrate on anything else after Elizabeth’s words. He struggled to contain his impatience as they walked through the stages of the service. As soon as she took her position across from him, he caught her eye and mouthed the question, “When?”

She glanced around, and seeing everyone’s attention focused elsewhere, and allowed her lips to shape the word, “Friday.”

His heart pounded. Friday was only three days away—she could be his so soon! Intoxicated by the concept, he countered soundlessly, “Thursday.”

The corners of her mouth twitched, but she shook her head slightly. “Friday,” she insisted silently.

He smiled slowly in return. “Thursday.”

“If I could have the complete attention of the bridesmaid and the groomsman for just a few minutes,” the parson said with some acerbity. Elizabeth, looking guilty, turned her attention forward.

Darcy continued to watch her, attending only slightly to the proceedings. At first he was content to bask in her presence and the knowledge that she wanted to marry so soon, but as she continued to avoid meeting his eyes, he began to wonder if she thought he had been too forward for suggesting an even earlier date. It seemed unlikely, as he had certainly made similar proposals to her in the past few days with no ill effect, so perhaps this was another case of his worrying over nothing. But perhaps it was not—he cast a searching gaze over Elizabeth, hunting vainly for some hint as to her state of mind.

He wondered if he would ever gain a sense of certainty about her feelings for him, or if his life was to be a continual cycle of worrying that he had somehow offended her. Surely marriage would help, and time would allow him to rebuild the sense of confidence that had been shattered at Hunsford. He had misread her so badly before that, and her change of sentiment toward him at Pemberley had happened so rapidly; how was he to feel certain of her?

When the rehearsal drew to a close, and the party prepared to adjourn to Longbourn, he finally managed to catch her attention. “Will you walk out with me, Elizabeth? It seems we have much to discuss.”

She hesitated, clearly torn between a desire to be alone with him and wondering about the wisdom of such a course, given their history.

“I will even promise to make an attempt to behave, if that will help,” he said.

“To make an attempt to behave? Does that mean that you do not usually make such an attempt, sir?” she responded playfully.

“Perhaps it means that I frequently encounter provocation beyond the ability of man to ignore,” he retorted in like spirit.

She shook her head with mock gravity. “Clearly I have misconstrued you yet again; it had seemed to me that you enjoyed being so provoked, sir.”

With a slow smile, he said, “You know very well what I like, my dearest, and at the moment I believe you would like to see how quickly you can defeat my resolve!”

Elizabeth glanced up at him, and gave a dramatic sigh. “Then I suppose that I must try not to say anything too provocative, since you clearly understand me too well!”

Darcy could not help but laugh. “Do not stop for my sake, my love! But to the subject at hand, please forgive my impatience earlier. If Friday is what you wish, Friday it shall be.”

With a teasing look, she responded, “Whereas I was beginning to think that a case could be made for Thursday! Sir, I must conclude that you and I are in danger of becoming altogether too agreeable.”

He laid a hand on her arm. “You are not angry, then?”

She looked at him in surprise. “Not in the slightest! If I have some cause for anger, I remain blissfully unaware of it.”

He smiled with relief—another false alarm. “When you would not look at me in the church, I was concerned. I am glad to know that it was groundless.”

Elizabeth laughed. “I was trying to pay attention to the rehearsal!”

“Whereas I myself have long since given up on paying attention to anything else when you are present!” His gaze warmed. “I recall once, last November, when you came into the library at Netherfield while I was reading there. You selected a book to read—some Renaissance poetry, if I am not mistaken—and I recall spending fully half an hour concentrating on turning the pages of my book at appropriate intervals so that you would not discover how much your presence distracted me.”

“You were quite successful, then, as I was typically oblivious to any of it!” said Elizabeth with some chagrin. “Even then, so early in our acquaintance, you had noticed me?”

“It took me very little time to notice you, but a great deal of time making an effort not to notice you.”

“You fought it so? When, then, did you begin to love me? I can comprehend your going on charmingly when you had once made a beginning, but what set you off in the first place?”

“I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew I had begun. Can you name the moment when you first realized that you loved me?”

“Easily—it was in Lambton, at the inn; I had just told you of Lydia’s folly. You said you were leaving, and I assumed that you wanted to avoid any further association with me. I thought that I should never see you again, and that was when I knew that I loved you.”

“You should have known by then that you could not be rid of me so easily!”

“Please recall that I had, at that point, hardly begun to reassure myself that you still cared for me at all! I am almost afraid of asking what you thought of me, when we met at Pemberley.”

“I felt nothing but surprise at first. Well, in truth, my very first thought was that I had somehow conjured you up from thin air, since you had been very much in my mind all that day.”

“As you had been in mine, but I had the excuse of being at your home, and hearing about you from your housekeeper. But why were you thinking of me?”

He took her hand and looked at it gravely. “You would no doubt be startled, my love, to know how frequently you were in my mind then.” He paused, remembering that afternoon, and his decision to reach Pemberley a day before the remainder of the party in order to have the opportunity to privately exorcise Elizabeth’s ghost from his home. It was the first time he had been there since Kent, and he had spent so many hours imagining her by his side there that he knew his return would be a painful reminder of the fact she would never be his. Finally clearing his head from the constant refrain of she has never been here; she never will be here during his ride to Pemberley, and then almost the minute he dismounted, he discovered that she was there.

He thought with mortification of the figure he must have cut then, covered with road dust and no doubt stinking of horse. “When I came across you there I was certainly at my least presentable, not only in appearance but in my complete inability to hold a coherent conversation—and what did you think, seeing me so?”

Elizabeth colored and laughed. “I was far too preoccupied with my own embarrassment to give a thought to your position! I thought you would believe I was throwing myself in your path, and I certainly did not expect any consideration from you at all!” She paused, then added, “But I must admit I did notice how handsome you looked.”