Another knock, which didn’t help his heart rate any. The way the poor organ had been abused tonight, it was a wonder it was still ticking at all. “Shit,” he said again, brilliantly.
“I didn’t answer when he called,” Abby said quietly.
He stared at her. What did she mean, she hadn’t answered the call? Hard to tell in the dark since he couldn’t read her expression.
The knock came again. Then Serena’s voice. “Hawk?”
Okay, maybe he could get those five years back. Holding onto his towel, he opened the door to find Serena holding a stack of folded clothing. “Hey,” she said, and looked him over with frank appreciation before grinning. “Damn.” She waggled her eyebrows. “Almost makes me sorry I dumped your workaholic ass.”
“Serena-”
“Oh, relax. I know what’s good for me and what’s not. And you are definitely not.” She thrust the clothing at him, which he struggled to grab and also keep a grip on the towel.
Serena appeared to enjoy the battle. “Thought you could use some of the clothes you left here. And I brought Abby something, too. Also, I pulled the truck into my garage.”
All irritation at her interruption vanished. “Thanks.”
She tried to peer into the dark room behind him, but couldn’t. “Also, there’s a first aid kit in the pile, for that cut on your head. Do you need a doctor?”
He felt like he’d been hit with a Mack truck, but he was fairly certain he was going to live. “Nah. I’m okay.”
“All right, tough guy.” Leaning in, she kissed his cheek. “You’re in it deep again, aren’t you?”
“A little.”
“Honey, with you, there’s no ‘little’ anything.” And with a smile she walked away.
Hawk shut the door and turned back to the dark room. There she was. Still by the bed.
“Did she love you?”
He couldn’t believe that this was the conversation they were going to have before he went to jail. “She used to say she did.”
“She still wants you.”
He set the clothes on the foot of the bed. “She dumped me.”
“Maybe, but that doesn’t change her feelings.”
Hawk reached for the light.
“Don’t, please.”
Easing back, he tried to see her. “Abby-”
“You let yourself be loved. I’m just trying to picture this, the big, badass, tough as nails, elusive, edgy Conner Hawk, letting himself be loved by a woman.”
“Badass?” With a harsh laugh, he scrubbed a hand over his face. “I don’t feel so badass. With you, I feel…”
“What?”
Since she sounded sincerely curious, he decided to tell her. “Like a sorry-ass marshmallow. Am I going to jail, Abby?”
“No.”
Relieved, he sank to the mattress. “And why is that?”
“Because while I retrieved Tibbs’s message, I didn’t speak to him.”
“What did he say?”
“That I need to tell him where I am. He said that they found the murder weapon in the clearing near the barn with your prints on the gun. Oh, and the barn was a complete loss-a total burn.”
That took some careful planning. Careful planning, and planting of explosives in the right spots.
Knowledge, of course, that Gaines had. “They have my prints because it’s my own damn gun,” he said tightly. “He took it from me. But how is it that the gun didn’t melt in the fire? Pretty damn suspicious if you ask me.”
“Agreed.”
Hawk didn’t know what hit him the hardest-that she’d stayed willingly when given a chance to leave or the quiet word that signaled she was beginning to believe him. It was a good thing he was already sitting, he was that shaky with relief.
But he wasn’t alone at all. He leaned back against the headboard, and with the same care he’d give a nuclear bomb, reached for her. “Come here.”
Shockingly, she let him pull her in. He did so very slowly, not wanting to scare her off, but needing to feel her close. She sat at his side, but went still when he tugged her into the crook of his arm.
“Don’t,” she choked out.
“Shh. You’re okay.”
Instead of responding with a slug to the gut as he was more than half braced for, Abby absolutely devastated him by setting her head on his shoulder.
And then she finished him off by turning her face into his neck.
His entire body went still as stone because he was afraid if he moved, hell if he so much as breathed, he’d scare her and she’d scramble away. It shocked him how much he wanted her to stay, just as she was, curled against him, for, oh…the rest of his life.
Holy shit, if that wasn’t a thought. His need for her surprised him, but not more so than her clear reflection of it right back at him.
Whether she admitted it or not, she wanted him, too.
She trusted him. An onslaught of tenderness hit him so hard he nearly bawled like a baby. Gently, because he couldn’t resist, Hawk pressed his mouth to her temple, brushing his lips across her skin in a light caress, more for comfort than sex, though there were plenty of those urges as well. “You okay?” he whispered.
“I think so. It’s the first time I’ve done this, gotten this physically close since…”
He closed his eyes and struggled not to squeeze her. “I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, Abby. I’d never do anything to hurt you.”
“I hurt you.” She was quiet a moment. “I hurt you and you didn’t hurt me back.”
“Yeah. The truth is, you could gut me right here, I’m that helpless when it comes to you. But not you. You are not helpless.”
“I was last time.”
He drew a careful breath to remain relaxed, as a shocking amount of violence suddenly coursed through him. “I’m sorry. So damned sorry.”
“They handcuffed me.”
Christ, he wished to God he’d never done that to her. He wished even more than he could go back in time and be there that day for her.
“To a wall. They took my clothes and brought out these jumper cables, which they said were effective in getting information out of people.”
He needed to shoot something. That might help.
“But Gaines rescued me just in time.”
He opened his eyes. “Before they-”
“Yes,” she whispered. “I was okay.”
“Yeah, you are.”
“No, I mean I don’t hate men or anything…” She let out a little laugh. “Contrary to how I’ve treated you.”
“I can’t tell you how very happy I am to hear that you don’t hate men, since I’m one. But…”
“But why, if I don’t hate men, did I treat you like crap from day one?” she guessed.
Hawk rubbed his jaw over the sweet silk of her hair. “Yeah.”
“Apparently not hating men and letting them close are two different ballgames entirely. Up until moving to Cheyenne, it was easy to keep my distance from guys. Probably too easy. Then I met you.”
He stopped breathing. “And…?”
“And I couldn’t keep my distance. So I pretended.”
“Okay, I have to do this.” Still moving slowly, he shifted onto his side, pulling her in for a hug, melting a little when she let him.
