Revealed

are gonna probably be hard for you to hear, but you don’t need to be freaked.”

“Because no matter what I’ll always be your Warrior and Guardian?”

He looked super nervous. I threaded my fingers through his. “Yes, that’s part of it, but there’s also the part about me loving you.”

“Oh, good. I like that part.”

“Me, too,” I said. “But I also have to like you.”

“I thought you just said you did.”

“No, I just said I loved you. And I do. But you’ve been doing some things lately that I don’t like very much and we have to talk about it.”

“What do you mean?”

I decided that if I was going to be honest with myself, I had to be honest with Stark, so I told him the truth —straight out. “I don’t like how you treat me when Aurox is around. You act like a possessive jerk, and I want you to stop.”

He tried to pull his hand from mine, but I wouldn’t let him. “The point is, I don’t think you are a possessive jerk. I like who you really are, and I want you to go back to being that guy, all the time.”

“Fine. Whatever.”

“No, Stark. This isn’t gonna work if you’re not honest with me, and with yourself. You’ll always be my Warrior, but if you get all defensive with me and we can’t talk about our problems, it’ll end up that you’ll only be my Warrior and nothing else.”

“Is that what you want?”

“Seriously, Stark, think about it. If that was what I wanted, why would you and I be having this conversation?”

“So, you’re not breaking up with me?”

“I hope not,” I said.

He slowly let out a long breath like he was deflating. His shoulders slumped and he stared at the floor between his feet. “Knowing that you love Aurox is driving me fucking crazy, and I’m sorry it’s made me act like a douche. I don’t know what to do about it, though, because I can’t stand to think about you being with him.”

“Okay, first, I don’t love Aurox. I love Heath. I’ll always love Heath. You know that.”

“But Aurox has Heath’s soul inside him.”

“Yep, and I’m glad he does because that’s all that saved Grandma. I’ll always appreciate Aurox for that, but I don’t love him.”

“You don’t want to be with him? For real?” Stark pulled his gaze from the floor to look at me.

“I’ve decided I don’t want to be with him. For real,” I said.

“Why not?” Then, before I could answer him, Stark cut me off, “No—no, nevermind. I don’t care why not. I just care that you don’t want to be with him. I don’t want to know anything more than that.”

Okay, I’d meant to tell Stark about me tasting Aurox’s blood, and that it was really hard for me when I caught glimpses of Heath peeking out from inside Aurox, and that I did actually still love Heath and him. But even with all of those ands I’d decided that I just couldn’t handle having more than one boyfriend at a time. Instead I didn’t get to say any of that because Stark pulled me into his arms.

“I’m so damn glad you picked me!” he whispered.

I could feel that he was trembling, so I held him and whispered, “Me, too.” Then he was kissing me with a need that burned so hot that I couldn’t think about what I’d meant to say. All I could think about was his touch and how much I loved him.

It was later, after the sun had risen and Stark slept soundly beside me, his arm draped across my body, his side pressed intimately against me, that my mind started to work again, and I knew I had to talk to Aurox. 

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Zoey

It wasn’t hard to slide Stark’s arm off me and sneak out of bed. Stark was totally passed out. I didn’t think an exploding bomb would wake him up. Still, I meditated on how sparkly my new phone cover was as I got dressed and tiptoed from the room.

A bomb might not wake Stark up, but my emotions going crazy probably would.

Thankfully, no one was around. Even though it was midmorning the sky was the color of a bruise and it smelled like spring thunderstorms. On the way to the field house I noticed the wisteria planted along parts of the school wall was budding up with big purple bunches of blossoms. Then I sneezed. Yep, thunderstorms, flowers, and allergies. Spring had to be coming to Oklahoma.

I went into the field house through the stables and paused in the hall between buildings, breathing deeply of horse and hay and trying to keep my emotions calm.

I’m just going to be honest. It’ll hurt his feelings more if I stretch this out and avoid him. Heath would understand.

I snorted a laugh at myself. No, Heath would not understand. Heath would tell me, “We belong together, babe!” and ignore the fact that I was breaking up with him. Again.

Kalona was standing by himself in the hallway outside the entrance to the basement.

“Zoey, you’re up late,” he said as he fisted his hand over his heart and gave me a little bow.

I hadn’t seen him since he’d cut Dallas’s head off and flown away with two fledglings struggling under his arms. He didn’t look any different. I suppose I shouldn’t expect him to. Still, I couldn’t help being morbidly curious. “Hi,” I said. “So, how’d things go with the two fledglings?”

“As they were meant to go.”

“Are they, you know, dead?”

Kalona shrugged, causing his massive wings to rustle. “I left them in the middle of the Tall Grass Prairie. With the storms covering the sun they might last the day, but they certainly will not last another.”

“Are you going to take care of their bodies?”

He shook his head. “Coyotes will do that job for me.”

“That’s really cold,” I said.

“Justice often seems cold. That is not a trait Thanatos and I originated. Judging, condemning, and carrying out justice is not pleasant. Is it not this country whose symbol for justice is a blind maiden holding scales of judgment?”

“Uh, I don’t think that’s because she’s cold. I think that’s because justice shouldn’t be based on the way a person looks or who he or she is—it should be based on the facts.”

“I do not understand the distinction you are making.”

“Nevermind.” I gave up. “I’m looking for Aurox. Have you seen him?”

“It was his turn to patrol the school perimeter. If you go out the front entrance to the field house, he should be circling back around shortly.”

“Okay, great. Uh, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention to anyone that I was looking for—”

Kalona held up a hand, cutting me off. “I will not tell tales to your Warrior.”

I thought about correcting him and saying that wasn’t it at all, that I just didn’t want fledglings to be gossiping about Aurox and me, but my mouth wouldn’t form the lie, so I sighed and said, “Yeah, thanks.” And then I scurried away.

No one was out in the front side of the school, either, and I found a bench not far from the field house door. While I sat and waited for Aurox, I watched the thunderclouds get closer and thought about what Kalona had said.

Maybe he was right. Judging others wasn’t pleasant. There was a time when I would have also thought judging others was wrong, but I’d agreed with Thanatos in her condemnation. I suppose I even agreed with her penalty. So, did that make me a hypocrite when, afterward, I felt all squeamish and disgusted? Or did that make