these current dark days. I smelled bad and I was past being a
whore and they didn’t want me to go in but I had the money
and I’m hard to move, because I’m more intransigent now; on
cement; hungry almost all the time; hates men; an old woman
nearly, hates men; and if you don’t have a soft spot for them,
you don’t have no soft spot. I wanted to see Linda; if she was a
creature or a person; I think they are all persons but you can’t
prove it, it’s a matter o f faith; I have this faith, but there’s no
proof. In the film she’s this nice girl who can’t have an orgasm
so they line up hundreds o f men to fuck her, all around the
block, and they just keep fucking her every which w ay to
Sunday to try to get her to have one and she’s bored which, on
the intellectual plane, would be true; but I fucked that many
men, it’s a w eek’s worth, not one afternoon as they show, and
no one gets an orgasm from such a line o f slime acting as men,
because it will tear you and bruise you inside as well as out and
you will hurt very bad, but she just smiles and acts disappointed; and there’s all this blah blah, talk with a supposed girlfriend, a hard-edged whore, by which I mean she been
used so much already there’s not too much left o f her and it
shows, how they’ve drained her away; and they talk about
how Linda can’t come; and the girlfriend puts a cigarette in her
own vagina and I wanted to reach into the film and take it out;
a burning cigarette in her vagina; but it was another joke; it
was all jokes; the men around the block; the vagina huffing and
puffing on the cigarette so smoke comes out; and the girl
Linda’s got big bruises all over her legs, real big bruises, high
and wide, master bruises, have to be from feet and fists, it ain’t
in the story, no one hit her in the legs in the story but someone
sure beat the hell out o f her all over her fucking legs; I see the
bruises; I feel the pain; I’ve taken such a beating; perhaps,
Linda, we could be friends, you and me, although I’m
unsavory now, perhaps you ain’t no creature at all, just a girl,
another girl, but they caught you and they put you under
glass, in the zoo, yo u ’re a girl they turned the camera on but
they had to beat you to pieces to do it; maybe yo u ’re just some
girl; and then there’s this doctor with a big cock w h o ’s pleased
with him self generally speaking and he finds out she’s got a
clitoris in her throat, the big joke, and that’s w hy she can’t
come from all these other sex acts so he fucks her in the throat
to cure her, he fucks her hard in the throat but slow so you can
see it, the whole distance in and out, the whole big thing, to
the bottom o f her throat; and she don’t seem ripped apart,
she’s smiling, she’s happy, shit, she’s conscious, she’s alive;
think o f it like an iron bar, a place in your throat where there’s
an iron bar, and if someone goes past it it don’t give, you
choke, you vom it, you can’t breathe, and if he goes past it with
a big penis he stretches muscles that can’t be stretched and he
pushes your throat out to where it can’t be pushed out, as if the
