I patted the ground beside me. “Sit down.”
“Why?”
I closed my eyes. “Because I want to talk to you and I can’t stand up anymore.”
Anaya hesitated for a second, then crossed over and sat down beside me. So close our thighs almost touched. So close her warmth reached out and latched onto me, making me shiver.
“What happens to me after all of this, Anaya?” I asked. “After all of this is over, what are the chances that I get the kind of peace you give to all those souls you carry over? What are the chances that I’ll get to be with my dad?”
She tensed beside me. I leaned my head back, letting the bark dig into my scalp, not wanting to acknowledge how much I wanted to touch her in that moment. Just how much I wanted the things she told me to be true. When Anaya didn’t answer me, I cracked an eye open to look at her. Her golden eyes were closed but her lids still glowed. Her skin looked like bronzed silk under the moonlight.
“Anaya?”
Anaya averted her gaze so that I couldn’t see her face and whispered, “Can’t we talk about something else?”
My heart thudded painfully in my chest. Noah was right. This wasn’t going to end well for me. I looked down the street to the dark windows of Emma’s house where the shadows waited. I should have demanded answers from her, the kind Noah was willing to give, but I didn’t. I didn’t think I could stomach it if she lied to me.
“Does it hurt?” she whispered.
“A little,” I said. “It’s hard to breathe. And I’m so freaking cold. I’m tired of being cold all the damn time.”
Anaya rested her hand on my wrist and I opened my eyes.
“Maybe I can help,” she said. “If you’ll let me.”
I swallowed and nodded. Anything. I was starting to think I’d do anything this girl asked me to.
Even with Noah’s words ringing in my ears, I was helpless when it came to wanting her. I couldn’t deny it anymore. I looked down at her hand. Hell, what did I have to lose? I was on my way out anyway.
Anaya sat on her knees and leaned in close to me. I couldn’t help but notice her white dress bunched up around her thighs. I probably shouldn’t have been looking. Probably.
“Cash?”
I tore my eyes away and Anaya was grinning. “Huh?”
She laughed and her whole face softened, taking the serious edge away, leaving just a pretty girl with gold eyes staring back at me, making my heart work a little faster. She reached up to cup my cheek with her palm and I flinched. Her fingers spread out, consuming the right side of my face.
“Just breathe,” she whispered. I took a deep breath. Exhaled. Took another breath, focusing on the feel of her open palm against my cheek. That last breath stayed stuck in my lungs when the warmth began to flow. Slow. Steady. It poured from Anaya’s palm and fingertips. Straight sunshine, seeping into my pores, setting my skull on fire. I closed my eyes and placed my hand over hers to hold it in place. God…
My heart pounded like it had been frozen for so long, it’d forgotten it could pump this fast. I needed more. Couldn’t wait. Without thinking, I reached out and snaked an arm around Anaya’s waist and jerked her on top of my lap. She gasped and the sound forced my eyes open.
“Cash…”
I pulled her other hand up and placed it on the right side of my face. My skin instantly began to thaw. So good. I’d almost forgotten what being warm felt like. Her thighs set my hips on fire, the flames spreading all the way down to my toes.
Heat. Peace. Pain. I could barely breathe through it all.
“Please,” I said. “Please, don’t let go.”
She slid her palms down my neck until they rested over the pulse throbbing just under my skin. She shook her head. “I won’t.”
Anaya pressed her forehead to mine and our breaths clashed in the one inch of space between our mouths. It took everything in me not to kiss her. She’d made it clear she didn’t want me, but it didn’t stop me from wanting her. I shuddered, gripping her hips, not wanting to let go. Not ever wanting this moment to end. Slowly, every part of me warmed. The blood in my veins. The bones and skin that held me together. All of it blazed with Anaya’s essence.
“Thank you,” I whispered against her cheek.
Anaya nodded, causing my lips to brush against her face. “Just…try to sleep. You need it.”
I needed a lot of things in that moment. But having her molded to me like this, her heat filling up my insides, my hands on the swell of her hips…let’s just say sleep was pretty far down the list.
“Like this?” I asked.
Her thumbs rubbed up and down my throat, causing me to squeeze her tighter. “Yes. Like this.”
“Why does this feel…”
“Right?”
“Yeah,” I said.
Anaya sighed and shook her head. Her braids created a tent around our faces. She smelled like the sea. She smelled…familiar. “I don’t know,” she said. “I…don’t know.”
Chapter 16
“Rise and shine.”
Cash groaned, pushing his face back into the pillow, and I frowned. I was risking a lot being here today. Especially after last night. Cash falling asleep cocooned in my warmth, his hands touching places that hadn’t known another in a thousand years…it had been too much. Too close. But it had helped him. He had actually slept all night. I hoped today would add to that progress as well as give me the answers that Balthazar refused to give.
“Sleeping,” he grumbled into the cool pillowcase.
I crossed my arms over my chest. “You can sleep when you’re dead. Get up.”
“How about you crawl in here with me to keep me warm instead? Fair warning, though, I can’t be held responsible for what happens once you’ve entered my lair.”
I could see half of his grin against the pillow and I couldn’t stop myself from smiling, wondering exactly what he would do if I took him up on his offer. I shouldn’t have been wondering things like that. Not when I would eventually end up trading him in for a ticket back to Tarik. I touched a fingertip to the back of his neck and watched him bow up off the bed as heat singed down his spine.
He inhaled, and stilled as if he expected me to go on. I pulled my hand away.
“Come on.” I sat on the edge of his bed and the sheets began to warm. “I want to show you something. It will make you feel better.”
Cash rolled over and squinted up at me.
“Don’t you have souls to reap?”
“Not at the moment.” I yanked the blankets off him. “But that’s why we should hurry. My time is limited.”
Cash grumbled something under his breath and stumbled off to the shower. When he emerged, his hair was wet and spiky and he was wearing a green T-shirt that said
He caught me reading it and grinned, scrubbing his fingers through his hair to shake the excess water out. “You wouldn’t be the first girl this shirt has worked on. But you could be the first dead one if you wanted.”
I rolled my eyes. “Let’s go.”
