tears start falling again.
More than anything, I want to pull the car over and hold her. I want to kiss and touch her until all the pain of that stupid, shitty life melts away, but I don’t. I stare ahead at that white line, the only thing that’s kept me grounded and away from trouble these past few years. I stare at it until it blurs and burns into my mind the string of mistakes I’ve left behind me. I stare at it and wonder if it it’s time to start following it again until it runs out completely.
Chapter Fourteen
Ana
Pulling the front door shut behind me, I race across the gravel alley and into the back of the shop. Holly’s leaning over the front counter, fogging up the glass with her breath.
“You know I’m gonna make you clean that, right?” I say, and toss her a rag.
“Ana.” She whirls around, completely guilty. Her eyes practically pop out of her head when she takes in my outfit. The shock is not completely unwarranted, because I’m wearing skinny jeans, fuck-me boots and my fitted black leather jacket, zipped low with nothing but a bra beneath it. “Holy shit, woman! Where is he taking you, again?”
“Lantern Parade in Lismore. Do I look okay?”
“Are you kidding me? Cade is gonna bust a nut seeing you in this outfit.”
“That’s the idea. I think.”
A highly irritating laugh comes from the booth closest to the window. It sets my teeth on edge and, if I’m completely honest, kinda makes me want to punch someone’s face in. Then I remember the last time I had that feeling and it’s suddenly crystal clear who that pretentious sound belongs to: Nicole White. I glance in her direction and see her bitchy partner in crime sitting opposite.
Perhaps the only thing worse is seeing their pinched up, constipated faces pressed to the glass of my pie shop as they outright ogle the fresh meat out the window. I follow their gaze and realise they’re staring across the road at a shirtless, grease-stained Elijah.
A tsunami tide of jealousy swells inside me. It’s irrational, but there all the same.
“How long have Slut and Sluttier been here?” I whisper to Holly.
“About twenty minutes.”
“And how long has my boyfriend been parading around without a shirt?”
“About an hour,” she replies, dreamily. I whip my head around to glare at my supposed best friend and she shrugs. “What? There’s a kinky sex god half-naked across the road. Sorry, girl, but a body like that deserves to be worshiped.”
“He gets enough worshipfulness from me, his girlfriend by the way—in case you’d forgotten who you’re ogling.”
“Oh, I haven’t forgotten. Haven’t forgotten you promised me more details either.”
“You’re such a perve.”
“You know it. And honey, you have nothing to worry about. Anyone can see he’s mad about you.” She smiles and then throws me a wink. “Plus, even if I wanted to hit that, my hands are bound by the code: Hoe Hoes before Bros.”
“That’s too bad, because Elijah
“You dirty little slutsky. One of these days you’re going to remember I’m your best friend and tell me everything.”
“One of these days I’ll tell you every little insignificant detail, and it’ll be so ingrained in your mind, you won’t look at either one of us the same again. Then you’ll have to move towns in order to escape all those devastatingly gruesome mental pictures.”
“Ha! Like that’ll ever happen.” She leans over the counter and begins fogging it up again, then draws explicit pictures in the residue. “Ana, girl, you and I are gonna be stuck in this sad excuse of a town for the rest of our lives.”
“Maybe. But I’m beginning to wonder whether that would be such a bad thing.” I stare longingly out the window at my man. He wipes down his bike with smooth, even strokes and, with a giggle from the front booth, it’s apparent that I’m not the only girl in the room appreciating the sight of his muscled torso straining beneath his tanned, tattooed skin. His phone must ring because he straightens and stares at the screen before running a hand over the back of his neck and answering it. Then he disappears inside the shop and I take it as my cue to leave. Holly has other ideas and pulls me back to her side.
“You’re in love with him,” she accuses, but on her face is a huge, megawatt smile, and I can’t help but smile awkwardly back. Holly wipes a pretend tear from her eye. “Aw, my little girl’s all grown up. When are you going to let him stick it to ya?”
That’s my best friend for you; sadly there’s never been a filter between her brain and her mouth. Which, come to think of it, is probably why she’s always got someone’s penis in it.
“I was thinking tonight.”
“OH MY GOD! You’re letting the sex god nail you tonight and you’re only telling me this now?!” she screeches, and I so desperately want to hide beneath the counter because both Nicole and her bitchy sidekick, Renee, are glaring at us. Holly remains steadfastly unaware of the mortification she’s inflicting upon me and jumps up and down, clapping her hands. “Okay, okay, okay. Knickers?”
“The white G-string you helped me pick out.”
“White? That’s good. Virginal. He’ll be reminded this is a first for you and hopefully won’t just impale you on his pork sword.” Holly doesn’t see me scrunch up my nose in distaste at that imagery. Her mind is working a mile a minute and she has a glazed-over look in her eyes that I’m beginning to feel nervous about. “Matching bra?”
“Of course.”
“You know it hurts like a bitch the first time? Sometimes the second, too.”
“Yeah, I’m really not looking forward to that part.”
“You’ll be fine. You’re obviously in very good hands.”
“Really not as comforting as you’d think,” I deadpan.
“Hey, it’s better than being with a then fifteen-year-old Chris Johnson who couldn’t figure out which hole was which and ended up prematurely ejaculating before he’d even rolled the condom on the whole way.”
“You’re never gonna let him live that one down are you?”
“That experience scarred me for life!”
“And yet you still turned around and tried again the next weekend.”
“Yeah, and some friend you are. You really should have stepped in and prevented that. All I can say is, thank god your hot cousin Jackson came to town a month later; otherwise I might have never ridden another pony again.” She waves off my belligerent look. “Anywhoo, enough about me. You remember how babies are made, right? You’re covered, or he will be?”
“Yes, Mum. Unlike some, I paid attention in PD/Health class.”
“That a girl.” She slaps my arse hard and sends me on my way. “Now, go bring that tattooed, motorcycle riding, kinky sex god to his knees, and don’t come back until you’re walking funny.”
With a chuckle, I hurry to the front door of the diner, a bundle of nervous energy and excitement. Just as I reach for the handle Nicole slides out of the booth and steps in my path.
“Hi Ana.”
“Er, hi?”
“I just wanted to thank you for not making a big deal about me sharing Elijah the other day.”
“Come again?”
