brought me into a world of sin and sorrow, and your timely aid has helped me out of the one and the other. 'And the good-natured fellow threw himself back in his chair, and fairly drew his hand across his eyes.
'You would not have me be made to ride the Skimmington then,' said the dame; 'or parade me in a cart, with all the brass basins of the ward beating the march to Bridewell before me?'
'I would sooner be carted to Tyburn myself,' replied the penitent.
'Why, then, sit up like a man, and wipe thine eyes; and, if thou art pleased with what I have done, I will show thee how thou mayst requite me in the highest degree.'
'How?' said Jenkin Vincent, sitting straight up in his chair.—'You would have me, then, do you some service for this friendship of yours?'
'Ay, marry would I,' said Dame Ursley; 'for you are to know, that though I am right glad to stead you with it, this gold is not mine, but was placed in my hands in order to find a trusty agent, for a certain purpose; and so— But what's the matter with you?—are you fool enough to be angry because you cannot get a purse of gold for nothing? I would I knew where such were to come by. I never could find them lying in my road, I promise you.'
'No, no, dame,' said poor Jenkin, 'it is not for that; for, look you, I would rather work these ten bones to the knuckles, and live by my labour; but—' (and here he paused.)
'But what, man?' said Dame Ursley. 'You are willing to work for what you want; and yet, when I offer you gold for the winning, you look on me as the devil looks over Lincoln.'
'It is ill talking of the devil, mother,' said Jenkin. 'I had him even now in my head—for, look you, I am at that pass, when they say he will appear to wretched ruined creatures, and proffer them gold for the fee-simple of their salvation. But I have been trying these two days to bring my mind strongly up to the thought, that I will rather sit down in shame, and sin, and sorrow, as I am like to do, than hold on in ill courses to get rid of my present straits; and so take care, Dame Ursula, how you tempt me to break such a good resolution.'
'I tempt you to nothing, young man,' answered Ursula; 'and, as I perceive you are too wilful to be wise, I will e'en put my purse in my pocket, and look out for some one that will work my turn with better will, and more thankfulness. And you may go your own course,—break your indenture, ruin your father, lose your character, and bid pretty Mistress Margaret farewell, for ever and a day.'
'Stay, stay,' said Jenkin 'the woman is in as great a hurry as a brown baker when his oven is overheated. First, let me hear that which you have to propose to me.'
'Why, after all, it is but to get a gentleman of rank and fortune, who is in trouble, carried in secret down the river, as far as the Isle of Dogs, or somewhere thereabout, where he may lie concealed until he can escape aboard. I know thou knowest every place by the river's side as well as the devil knows an usurer, or the beggar knows his dish.'
'A plague of your similes, dame,' replied the apprentice; 'for the devil gave me that knowledge, and beggary may be the end on't.—But what has this gentleman done, that he should need to be under hiding? No Papist, I hope—no Catesby and Piercy business—no Gunpowder Plot?'
'Fy, fy!—what do you take me for?' said Dame Ursula. 'I am as good a churchwoman as the parson's wife, save that necessary business will not allow me to go there oftener than on Christmas-day, heaven help me!—No, no—this is no Popish matter. The gentleman hath but struck another in the Park—'
'Ha! what?' said Vincent, interrupting her with a start.
'Ay, ay, I see you guess whom I mean. It is even he we have spoken of so often—just Lord Glenvarloch, and no one else.'
Vincent sprung from his seat, and traversed the room with rapid and disorderly steps.
'There, there it is now—you are always ice or gunpowder. You sit in the great leathern armchair, as quiet as a rocket hangs upon the frame in a rejoicing-night till the match be fired, and then, whizz! you are in the third heaven, beyond the reach of the human voice, eye, or brain.—When you have wearied yourself with padding to and fro across the room, will you tell me your determination, for time presses? Will you aid me in this matter, or not?'
'No—no—no—a thousand times no,' replied Jenkin. 'Have you not confessed to me, that Margaret loves him?'
'Ay,' answered the dame, 'that she thinks she does; but that will not last long.'
'And have I not told you but this instant,' replied Jenkin, 'that it was this same Glenvarloch that rooked me, at the ordinary, of every penny I had, and made a knave of me to boot, by gaining more than was my own?—O that cursed gold, which Shortyard, the mercer, paid me that morning on accompt, for mending the clock of Saint Stephen's! If I had not, by ill chance, had that about me, I could but have beggared my purse, without blemishing my honesty; and, after I had been rooked of all the rest amongst them, I must needs risk the last five pieces with that shark among the minnows!'
'Granted,' said Dame Ursula. 'All this I know; and I own, that as Lord Glenvarloch was the last you played with, you have a right to charge your ruin on his head. Moreover, I admit, as already said, that Margaret has made him your rival. Yet surely, now he is in danger to lose his hand, it is not a time to remember all this?'
'By my faith, but it is, though,' said the young citizen. 'Lose his hand, indeed? They may take his head, for what I care. Head and hand have made me a miserable wretch!'
'Now, were it not better, my prince of flat-caps,' said Dame Ursula, 'that matters were squared between you; and that, through means of the same Scottish lord, who has, as you say, deprived you of your money and your mistress, you should in a short time recover both?'
'And how can your wisdom come to that conclusion, dame?' said the apprentice. 'My money, indeed, I can conceive—that is, if I comply with your proposal; but—my pretty Marget!—how serving this lord, whom she has set her nonsensical head upon, can do me good with her, is far beyond my conception.'
'That is because, in simple phrase,' said Dame Ursula, 'thou knowest no more of a woman's heart than doth a Norfolk gosling. Look you, man. Were I to report to Mistress Margaret that the young lord has miscarried through thy lack of courtesy in refusing to help him, why, then, thou wert odious to her for ever. She will loathe thee as she will loathe the very cook who is to strike off Glenvarloch's hand with his cleaver—and then she will be yet more fixed in her affections towards this lord. London will hear of nothing but him—speak of nothing but him—think of nothing but him, for three weeks at least, and all that outcry will serve to keep him uppermost in her mind; for nothing pleases a girl so much as to bear relation to any one who is the talk of the whole world around her. Then, if he suffer this sentence of the law, it is a chance if she ever forgets him. I saw that handsome, proper young gentleman Babington, suffer in the Queen's time myself, and though I was then but a girl, he was in my head for a year after he was hanged. But, above all, pardoned or punished, Glenvarloch will probably remain in London, and his presence will keep up the silly girl's nonsensical fancy about him. Whereas, if he escapes—'
'Ay, show me how that is to avail me?' said Jenkin. 'If he escapes,' said the dame, resuming her argument, 'he must resign the Court for years, if not for life; and you know the old saying, 'out of sight, and out of mind.''
'True—most true,' said Jenkin; 'spoken like an oracle, most wise Ursula.' 'Ay, ay, I knew you would hear reason at last,' said the wily dame; 'and then, when this same lord is off and away for once and for ever, who, I pray you, is to be pretty pet's confidential person, and who is to fill up the void in her affections?—why, who but thou, thou pearl of 'prentices! And then you will have overcome your own inclinations to comply with hers, and every woman is sensible of that- -and you will have run some risk, too, in carrying her desires into effect—and what is it that woman likes better than bravery, and devotion to her will? Then you have her secret, and she must treat you with favour and observance, and repose confidence in you, and hold private intercourse with you, till she weeps with one eye for the absent lover whom she is never to see again, and blinks with the other blithely upon him who is in presence; and then if you know not how to improve the relation in which you stand with her, you are not the brisk lively lad that all the world takes you for—Said I well?'
'You have spoken like an empress, most mighty Ursula,' said Jenkin Vincent; 'and your will shall be obeyed.'
'You know Alsatia well?' continued his tutoress.
'Well enough, well enough,' replied he with a nod; 'I have heard the dice rattle there in my day, before I must set up for gentleman, and go among the gallants at the Shavaleer Bojo's, as they call him,—the worse rookery of the two, though the feathers are the gayest.'
'And they will have a respect for thee yonder, I warrant?'
