The bed creaked as his momstood up. “No, you’re not,” she said matter-of-factly.
Caleb’s brow furrowed.“I’ve known since I was thirteen. I’ve kept it a secret because Iwas afraid. Confused.” His tone grew desperate. “And I didn’t wantto hurt you.”
His mom didn’t speak, andinstead, paced the room, running her fingers through her hair,dislodging her tight ponytail. Caleb’s eyes followed her movement.His breathing sounded heavy in his ears, marked by the rise andfall of his chest, a metronome that marked the seconds that tickedby.
His mom crouched by hisbed, sitting back on her heels.
“Caleb, listen to me. Youare not gay. I didn’t bring you up to be gay. Everyday, I pray foryou to grow up to be a kind, loving, healthy man, eventually with awife and kids of your own.” She drew in a deep breath. “This isjust a phase. We can go into counseling. I’m sure Father Mon canhelp us.”
“Ma!” Caleb sat up, hisback ramrod straight. “Are you even listening to me? I’m gay, andthis is not a temporary thing. It’s who I am.”
His mom shook her head.“I’m your mother, and I know you best.” The hand that smoothed backher hair was trembling. “And I know that no son of mine isgay.”
She stood up, feetscrambling into her black pumps. “You’ve done so well for yourself,Caleb. I’ve always been so proud of you.” She picked up herhandbag. “Don’t be a disappointment to me now.”
Pain was a cold, numbingthing that came in layers. First was disbelief at the wordsuttered, at his mom’s simple gesture of smoothing back her hair,signaling the end of their conversation. Then came a sadness sodeep that it made Caleb want to curl up and weep. The feeling ofbetrayal—that was what came next. How could someone who claimed tohave loved him even before he was born be capable of hurting himthis way? Caleb was grateful to discover that beneath all theselayers was an emotion he could hold on to. He allowed the hot angerto fill up his chest, drying up the tears even before theyfell.
“I’msorry, Ma,” Caleb said in a hard voice. “I’ve been a disappointmentto you for the past six years.”
They locked gazes for along time, but it was his mom who first looked away before she wentout the door.
Chapter 18: Play byEar
Caleb stuffed his bag withwhat he thought were essentials: school things, some clothes, atoothbrush, socks and slippers, a comb.
He didn’t have enoughmoney for a cab, so it took him a while to get to his destination.After three jeepneys and a long walk, he reached the house. Hepressed the doorbell and stepped back, heart pounding in hisears.
Out of nowhere, doubtchoked him with a vise-like grip. What was he doing? He couldn’tjust barge into someone else’s home like this. It was one of thoseimpulsive decisions that was bound to end badly. His body tensed,ready to turn around and leave. At the same moment, the gate flewopen.
“Yes?”Behind her black-rimmed glasses, the woman’s gaze was a mix ofconfused and suspicious. Caleb had never met any of “the aunts,”but this big-boned woman wearing a loose black shirt with thewords ROCK ON over a pair of shorts must be one of them. She looked likeshe was in her forties, still too young to be a grandma. But withher hair piled into a high bun, Caleb could picture her as apleasant old woman—the type who indulged her grandkids withhome-baked cookies.
He forced himself tospeak. “I’m here to see Ginny.”
“Ginny?” she repeated,forehead crinkling into three deep lines. She looked so baffledthat Caleb drew back to see if he had gotten the wrong house.“Ginny’s in school.” She peered at him. “And you are—?”
He felt his face redden.He hadn’t bothered checking the time when he left his house. It wasprobably just a few hours after lunch. Of course Ginny would stillbe in school.
“Caleb,” he mumbled.“Ginny’s friend.”
The face in front of himplayed out a montage of emotions—uncertainty, surprise, andfinally, delight. “Ginny talks about you all the time!” Shehesitated, as if wanting to ask more questions but she stoppedherself. Pushing the gate wide open, she smiled. “Comeinside.”
Caleb’s face burned withembarrassment. What right did he have to be here? He had avoidedGinny for days, and she had every right to be pissed at him. Andyet—here was her aunt looking at him like he was the most pleasantsurprise.
But where else would hego? He couldn’t stay home one minute longer. As the midday heatpummeled down his back, the weight of his backpack strained againsthis shoulders.
“Thank you.” Caleb bowedhis head and stepped inside.
* * *
Ginny didn’t talk muchabout her aunts—about what they did or how she was related tothem—but they popped into her stories often enough that Caleb knewshe was fond of them. He hadn’t been inside Ginny’s house either.Once inside, he was surprised to find the house spacious, dottedwith big, comfortable furniture perfect for lounging. In the livingroom, he encountered a massive wooden rocking chair, a daybedpeppered with throw pillows, and a linen couch that could easilyaccommodate his length. Through the sheer curtains, shafts ofsunlight lit the room.
Ginny’s aunt led him tothe couch at the same time another woman came down the stairs. Herpetite frame was dwarfed by her loose and colorful housedress.Caleb thought she looked like Ginny, minus the outrageoushair.
“Mitch, this is Caleb. Youremember Ginny’s friend?”
The shorthaired woman’seyes registered shock as she came up to Caleb. “Of course! We werewondering when we’d finally meet you.” Her eyes glided from thebulging backpack propped against the couch to his face. “Would youlike to wait for Ginny in the guest room? It’s more comfortablethere.”
Caleb shook his head.“I’ll be fine here, ma’am. Sorry for surprising you like this. Iforgot about Ginny being in school.” He added softly, “Thankyou.”
He caught the womenexchange pointed glances. “Please call me Tita Mitch.” Ginny’slookalike aunt smiled. “And don’t go all awkward on us because Kateand I are happy to meet you. Are you okay by yourself here? We’rein the middle of beating a work deadline.”
Caleb must have giventheir clothes a confused look because Kate chuckled. “We’rehome-based
