“Budget? I have no budget. Ever.” I say it before I can filter out my mother’s ingrained words, realizing too late how hoity toity and stuck up it sounds.
Grace pleases me again by not flinching or showing the slightest unease. “Sweet! Guess we’re going to get the best and hit lululemon in Frisco!”
“And for helping me, I’ll purchase you an outfit of your choice as well.”
Her eyes get huge. “For real! No way. You are crazy, girl. One top costs like two hundred dollars!”
“Then we must get you a few of them!” I half joke and wink. If the girl takes me shopping, I’m giving something to her in return. “Wish not, want not, Gracie,” I say, using the nickname I heard her brother use.
She takes another bite of her roll and dances in her chair once more. I follow along, eating my roll with a fork, sans the dancing, but I definitely do it smiling.
“And you’ll never believe what I did!” I pace behind the couch in Dr. Hart’s office.
She leans back and places a hand over her baby bump. Today she’s wearing a silk T-shirt dress that perfectly accentuates her protruding belly. I wonder if one day that life is in the cards for me. Before this week, I wouldn’t have even dared give it a thought. Now, I don’t know.
“What did you do?” Monet smiles, her lips painted a pale, glossy pink that goes well with her outfit. She looks like the goddess of Mother Nature. Fertile, with long flowing curls, pink lips, and a caring smile.
I shake off the random thoughts and go back to my pacing. “I accepted a date,” I offer proudly. “With a man.”
She chuckles. “That’s great. Where did you meet?”
“At the place where I’m taking yoga.”
“And how is that going for you, the yoga?” She alters my train of thought, breaking my desire to talk about Nick. It’s all about Nick lately. Every waking thought is about him or his sister.
I frown. “Fine. No, better than fine. Great. I’m working my body and muscles in ways I never dreamed, and I even made a friend.” I straighten my spine and lift my head.
“A friend?”
“Yes! We’re going shopping this week. And she’s the sister of the man who asked me on a date. She also teaches at the yoga studio.”
Dr. Hart leans forward placing her elbow on her knee. “I’m… I must say I’m really pleased with this progress. A new physical activity, a new friend, and a date. You’ve had quite the week, haven’t you?”
I come around the couch and plop down. Dr. Hart smiles instead of calling me out on my lack of poise.
“I’m sorry. That was rude and inappropriate,” I chastise myself.
She frowns. “No, it was a woman excited about her week, eager to tell me about it. Not rude. Not inappropriate. Now, continue. Let’s start with the yoga. How do you feel it’s helping you?”
I run my hand through my hair and think about how I lose myself, moving into each position. How everything around me just seems to slip away. There’s no anger, no grief, no fear. Just my body being pushed in healthy ways. “I think mentally and physically it’s helping me to balance some of the scrambled thoughts in my mind. It’s making me let go of the negative feelings that I have when I walk into the class. I leave feeling more refreshed. Does that make sense?”
She nods. “Very much so. I find yoga gives me a place of peace. Somewhere I can let my mind wander and just focus on my body and the movements.”
“Yes, exactly.”
“Now, the friend.”
“She’s younger than me,” I point out right away, though I’m not sure why. There’s nothing wrong with having a younger friend. “And she teaches Vinyasa Flow. She’s a very excitable and happy person. Nothing seems to bring her down.”
“And what do you think makes you connect with her?”
That’s the real question. “I don’t know. It’s more that she knows I’m going to go on a date with her brother, and for some reason, she clung on to me.”
“Not some reason. Perhaps she sees a nice girl who’s new to the yoga scene, and she wants to extend a friendly hand. Lots of people out in the world become friends and are often opposites of one another. Maybe she sees poise and class in you that she doesn’t have and would like to learn. Maybe she just thinks you’re new and cool. Or maybe she wants to impress her brother’s date. Whatever the reason, it doesn’t matter; she chose to be your friend. You have to choose to be hers in return.”
“I gave her my phone number, and she’s texted me a dozen times already.” I twirl my onyx ring around my finger.
Dr. Hart chuckles. “Eager, that one.”
“Yeah, I’ll say.” I smile, thinking about the variety of things she’s texted. Some were links to tops at the yoga store. Others were yoga poses. One was a selfie of her and Nick. I secretly made that my background on my phone.
“But isn’t it nice to receive those texts from someone who genuinely wants to talk to you or get your feedback?”
I nod. And she’s right. It really does feel good to have a friend. Picking up my phone and seeing texts from Grace gives me a sense of importance. Usually the only texts I get are from Sean checking in with me. Now I’ve got Sean and Grace texting to me. And supposedly Nick is going to check in with me this week too, prior to our date. I’m very eager to see if that happens.
Which reminds me that I’ve got to figure out a way to break off the date with my mom’s suitor, but honestly, I can hardly be bothered. I think I’m just going to ignore Mother and leave before the man is supposed to arrive. I’ve got yoga that night before I’m supposed to
