One week had passed since the letter with the red ribbon had arrived. Hari Bilas had not yet decided what to do. He remained depressed all the time, rarely attended the court sessions and, when he appeared at all, he postponed the hearings and left forthwith. To his children also, he talked very little. In conversation he was highly irritable. He had told his wife about his difficulties, but she did not approve of his idea of resigning, and he hesitated to mention the matter to his sons because he was afraid of breaking their hearts. He no longer believed in the noble intentions of the government. This employment no longer appeared to him as an option. Every moment of it was a heavy burden on him. He did not know any vocation or trade on which he could fall back. Even the simplest trading transactions, by which thousands of barely literate people made a living, were a closed book to him. He found himself unfit for any employment other than government service. This inability further aggravated his torment. He was torn between personal interest and duty. His situation was pitiable indeed.
On the eighth day he got news that a new panchayat for a ban on drugs and alcohol was to be held in a village nearby. There would be moral instruction, the chanting of religious hymns and a debate on the question of penalties for drug users. He admitted that drug abuse was ruinous for the country and especially for the lower classes and, therefore, any attempt to stop it should be welcomed. Several years ago he had served as commissioner in the drugs department. At that time he had looked at the problem from an official angle, regarding the campaign against drugs as equivalent to pushing drug abuse and drug trafficking underground and the well-meaning efforts of enlightened reformers as mainly based on opposition to the government, but time and experience had considerably changed his perspective. According to the letter with the red ribbon it was his duty to observe the activities of the panchayat and to prevent anybody from putting pressure or enforcing abstinence on others. Such an action appeared thoroughly unacceptable to him. He was sitting tormented by the inner struggle between his duty as a human being and his official duty when the local sub-inspector of police arrived with some armed guards for his support. Seeing him Hari Bilas became furious. He addressed him in an imperious tone: ‘What are you doing here?’
The sub-inspector replied, ‘Your Honour must have received the announcement of the panchayat. It is feared that there will be a riot. We have come to accompany Your Honour.’
‘I don’t see any danger. Yes, there will be a riot when you interfere without any reason.’
The sub-inspector looked at him with utter confusion and said, ‘I will remain at Your Honour’s side.’
‘There is no need for you to accompany me.’
‘I have the written order of the Superintendent of Police to assist Your Honour.’
‘You go back home and spend some days seeking redress for your sins. You have looked after law and order long enough. It is wonderful how you ended robbery and theft. For a long time you have been strangling the poor. Devote the last days of your life to the remembrance of God. It is possible that on the way to His court your burden will lose some weight.’
The sub-inspector was dumbfounded when he heard this crazy speech. He thought this man must be drunk today, or perhaps he had received such a blow that he was out of his senses. He bid goodbye and left.
These words expressed Hari Bilas’s inner turmoil as well as his final decision, as though this was the declaration of his resolve. While the policeman bade him farewell Hari Bilas began to formulate his resignation.
‘My dear sir, it is my firm conviction that the government order is the outward expression of Divine Will and its laws are based on mercy, right and justice. I served the government for fifteen years in which I honestly fulfilled my duties. It is possible that the authorities were not always happy with me because I never felt obliged to obey personal orders. Whenever I saw a conflict between my understanding of the law and the command of an official I followed the law. I always thought government service to be the best way of serving my country, but the orders issued in a letter _____ dated ____ run counter to my conscience and my principles. To my mind they are so unjust that I cannot bring myself to implement them. These orders interfere with the rightful freedom of the subjects and are meant to prevent their political awakening.
‘In view of these facts it would mean acting against my country and my nation if I remained in government service.
‘Along with other rights the subjects also have the right to political action; and since the government is bent on curtailing this right, I as an Indian can no longer offer my services and, therefore, request to be relieved from office without further delay.’6
When his friends heard the news of Hari Bilas’s resignation they began to admonish him but he remained firm in his resolve. Even then people hoped that the government would not grant his application so soon, but the approval arrived by cable the very next day. Hari Bilas was very happy. He went to his office in the best of moods early in the morning and handed over charge with a smile on his face. But when evening came his cheerfulness waned and all kinds of worries began to surround him. He owed hundreds of rupees to the cloth merchant. Some wages of the servants were outstanding. For six months he had not paid the rent for the house. The confectioner and the milkman also had to get some money. Thinking of these creditors his heart began to sink. He
