“I’m talking to you,” my father says.
“Come on, Daddy!” I say, aggravated. “What’s wrong with you?”
“That tone is unacceptable, so I suggest you find a new one.” Now he’s agitated. “I would like to have a conversation with you if you don’t mind,” he presses.
“Do you have a girlfriend?” He wants to talk, right? So let’s get down to it.
“What?” He’s caught off guard. “That is none of your business. And frankly that isn’t what I want to talk about.”
“I do,” I persist. “It is our business, because Cameron and I have to go down south because you and Mommy are fighting, and it had nothing to do with us, but we’re the ones paying for whatever mistake you made.”
“You know, you’ve become very opinionated and outspoken lately, young lady, and I’m not sure I like it.” My dad is trying to change course here, but he can tell by my crossed arms and raised eyebrows that I am very serious about hearing an answer.
“Daddy, I’m not a kid anymore,” I try to reason. “I know when something is going on.”
“So do you have a girlfriend?” Cameron asks.
Shocked, my father checks his rearview mirror and realizes Cameron is in on the conversation. He glances back at me, and I give him the same look I did earlier. Well? Daddy sighs as he searches for words.
“Your mother and I haven’t been getting along for some time now. But you know”—he looks away for a moment—“she’s just very hard to live with.”
“And you’re easy to live with? Hmm,” I mumble. Is he for real?
“What was that?” Dad asks.
I shrug and look out the window.
“You leave your socks everywhere, and Mommy makes me pick them up,” Cameron chimes in.
I snicker. Daddy shoots me a look.
“Okay, maybe not,” he admits. “But the story is a lot deeper than that. I mean, your mother and I were so young when we got married. We hardly knew each other….Look, I want you both to know that no matter what we decide, we will make sure we don’t miss a beat with you, and we’ll be there for you one hundred percent.”
“So you really are thinking about getting a divorce?” I ask with sadness. Daddy doesn’t respond.
“What’s a divorce?” Cameron is so innocent. “Is that code for ‘we’re getting a dog’?”
“No, Cameron.” I try to cover. “It’s when two people play Ping-Pong with their kids and think it’s better that way.”
“I like Ping-Pong.” Cameron doesn’t get it.
“I like Ping-Pong too, buddy,” Dad responds. “But don’t get too excited. We might not be playing for a while. Just hang tight, okay?”
“Do you still love Mommy?” I ask.
“Of course I do,” he says as he squints and gives me the side-eye. To that I raise an eyebrow at him, as if to ask, Love-love or just love?
Daddy starts to speak, then hesitates. It’s like he wants to say something but doesn’t know how to tell us the truth. He just lets out a big sigh and focuses on the road. And I go back to listening to my music. Ugh! Love seems so complicated, which is exactly why I can’t even think about having a boyfriend. If love comes with this many headaches, I’d rather not even go there, ever!
—
When we arrive at the airport, the tension in the car is still suffocating; I can’t wait to get out. Now even the lady at the ticket counter is flirting with my dad. Can’t she see he has kids? Flirting back comes easy to my dad. It’s like it’s in his DNA. They laugh and joke throughout the whole process of shipping us away.
“Hold on to these.” Dad hands me the tickets. “Make sure you call when you land. You hear me?”
“Call you with what?” I ask. “I never did get that phone you promised when I got to junior high.”
“If you keep talking to me with that attitude, you’ll never get one,” Dad responds. “Is that clear?”
“Yes, Daddy.” I nod, with sadness and frustration written on my face. My father grabs my shoulders.
“Listen, your mother and I have some things to work out, and nothing is certain,” he says.
“Why not?” I ask, really not understanding.
“Because life is about constantly making the best decisions.” Is Dad trying to be philosophical? “You know, life doesn’t come with instructions, and neither does marriage. Just know that your mother and I love you both very much.” He pulls out a wad of money and peels off a few bills. “Here, I think you guys can have a good time with this.”
“This is supposed to make us happy?” I say, angry and disappointed. “A few hundred dollars?”
“I’ll take it!” Cameron says happily as I hold him back.
“Kayla, I told you, you need to check that tone of yours.” My dad’s patience wanes. “I am still your father.”
“Then act like it!” I grab the money and Cameron’s arm and move quickly toward the escalator. I can’t help it. I’m going to suffer my whole summer because “life is about constantly making the best decisions.” Whatever! I am going to miss my friends, the double Dutch competition, and everything about being home for the summer. This sucks!
Daddy watches as we go up the escalator. He looks upset, but he knows he only has himself to blame. Maybe I am being hard on him because I don’t know what’s really going on. My mother might be a witch when Cameron and I aren’t around, for all I know. But regardless of what my dad says now, he’s always taught me that when I start something I should finish it; never leave unfinished business. He’s not practicing what he preaches. Hopefully he won’t leave us unfinished.
—
On the plane, Cameron and I settle next to
