“Let me help you with that.” He located another currycomb and started working on Amber’s other side, his long arms far more proficient than mine.
I’d been enjoying the solitude, but I had to remain gracious. “Denki, Mark.”
“Anytime.” He looked at me over Autumn’s withers. “I don’t mean to be pushy, but is there something you don’t like about me?”
“Not a thing.”
“Other than my age? What difference would five years make? In fact, a younger husband can take care of you longer.”
“Are you talking about marriage when we haven’t even been out on a date? I’m not ready. Please don’t rush me.” I wondered if he found me attractive because I was evasive. Maybe the same reason I’d wanted to seek Jake’s attention after he left.
A tangle of recollections snaked through my mind. Jake holding me in his arms as though he’d never let go. Our embraces in his buggy. But then my shock and bewilderment when I returned from Ohio to learn he’d gone away. I’d been tempted to hitch a ride or take the bus to New York to locate him. I’d held little dignity where Jake was concerned.
Fortunately, my parents suspected I was thinking about chasing him and stopped me. What kind of a man would marry a woman who’d grovel after him? Men were supposed to select their spouses, not the other way around.
Yet Jake told me he adored me, and I’d believed him.
My thoughts wandered to how the rumor I’d given birth to a child in Ohio had practically decimated me. According to the grapevine, my aunt and uncle had taken the child in and were raising it as their own. No way would I have abandoned my baby if I’d had one. In hindsight, maybe I shouldn’t have thwarted Jake’s more amorous advances. If I’d gotten pregnant, he might have married me. If not, I’d still have a child. Someone to love me more than anyone else in the world. Yet to deliberately raise a boppli without a father would be selfish.
Beatrice poked her head into the small barn. “How ya doing?” She seemed to feign a look of surprise. “Oh, I didn’t notice you, Mark.” Did she wish to be our chaperone?
“Stephen seemed to think you’re a fine horsewoman, Eva,” Beatrice said.
“I’m not as good as most.” I continued my chore and tried not to get flustered.
I felt Beatrice’s eyes assessing me. “My supper invitation still stands, Eva. You took off with Stephen too quickly to eat a meal at the end of your shift.”
I was hungry, my stomach growling, but I was also exhausted. “I have food in my cabin. But again, I thank you for your offer of hospitality.”
“As you like.” She humphed and left the barn.
The setting sun’s peach-colored rays illuminated the dust motes in the air. I noticed again what a handsome man Mark was. I understood Sadie’s attraction, but I felt more like his older sister. I wondered how he would have acted in Stephen’s situation with the Englisch sheep farmer. Would Mark have turned the other cheek as a righteous Amish man should? Would he have retrieved Heath through gentle conversation?
SIXTEEN
That night I awoke to a scuttling sound. A mouse in the roof space above the ceiling? As I drifted back to sleep, a tapping noise aroused me through the sheaves of slumber.
I imagined the intruder had returned to break in, but then I decided a perpetrator would try the door first. Maybe he’d found it locked and was about to throw a rock through the window.
Fully awake, I felt like a clock with a dead battery, its hands frozen in place. Until I heard rapping on the window. Pushing myself into action, I put on my bathrobe, grabbed the flashlight by my bed, and tiptoed to the window to see the silhouette of a man’s face. I heard my name.
“Evie, it’s me.” Hearing Jake’s voice sent a thrill through me.
“What are you doing here?” I moved closer and recognized his symmetrical face, illuminated by the main house’s porch light. His blond hair was cut short—Englisch. His square jaw was indeed cleanly shaven.
“Please let me in.” His voice sounded urgent.
“Nee, I can’t. Someone will see us.”
“Nee, they won’t.” His face pushed closer to the glass. “I walked in from the road without my flashlight on.”
I’d waited an eternity for this moment, but I cautioned myself. I didn’t break the rules anymore. And I didn’t trust Jake.
“Please,” he said. “I must talk to you.”
I stood frozen for a minute, my mind a battleground of indecision. This might be my one chance to speak to him in private. “Okay, for five minutes.”
Through the window, I scanned the big house, cloaked in darkness. Not a glimmer in Beatrice’s bedroom. No barking. Maybe the veterinarian had given Heath a sedative. Still, usually Minnie yapped.
As I cinched my bathrobe, Jake stole around to the door. I unlocked it, turned the handle, and cracked it open. He slipped inside. Being this close to Jake was almost unbearable. I caught the scent of his skin and work clothes. A mishmash of conflicting memories bombarded my mind, making me dizzy.
I took another look at the big house, and then closed the door without making a sound. I hoped.
“How did you know I’d be here?”
“Olivia told me.”
I wanted to throw myself into his arms, but I remained at a distance. “Why did you come?”
“To talk.”
“About?”
“You. Me. Everything.”
I was glad it was too dark for Jake to see my face or uncovered hair. A conflict of emotions flooded my chest, making it hard to breathe. “You shouldn’t be here.” I wanted to ask him about the woman I’d seen with him, but instead I said, “You sent me only two letters—with no return address—and left one
